Gestalten
by spottedhorse
Summary: Is Jim Brass really just a sarcastically funny cop with a checkered past or is there more to him? Read and decide;-
1. The Invitation

Gestalt: a structure, arrangement, or pattern of physical, biological, or psychological phenomena so integrated as to constitute a functional unit with properties not derivable by summation of its parts. Why this title? Because the cannon on JIm Brass gives us details about his past but not much substance except for his relationship (or lack of) with Ellie. Even the events we were shown, the friendly fire incident where he shot Bell and his own brush with death later, were brushed over by the writers. They never showed us the long term effects of any of these events in his life. After Ellie left him at the hopsital, we've never heard from her or about her since. Are we to believe he lives in a vacumn and these happenigs haven't taken a toll? Anyway, I think Paul Guilfoyle has played a much deeper character than the writers have written. Kudos to P.G. and shame on the writers. There are some Brillows fans out there and this is for you, especially. I hope all enjoy. BTW, the title and my thoughts here are probably a lot deeper than the story.

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Jim Brass leaned back in his chair and tossed the paper in the general direction of his desk. It floated onto the smooth surface, made contact, and then slid to the edge, gently floating down to the floor. He watched its journey and grunted as it landed. Still watching it, his hand came up to the back of his head, rubbing the short dark hair that suddenly seemed to bother him and then bringing his hand to his face, he stroked his chin thoughtfully, betraying inner turmoil.

Catherine Willows watched the scene from across the hall, gazing through the glass wall of his office and wondering what his obvious discomfort was all about. He was staring at the paper now and flexing his fingers, a sure sign that he was agitated. Curious and concerned, she stepped through the door of his office. "Jim?"

The detective looked up from the focus of his consternation at the CSI and his long time friend. "Hey Catherine, what brings you to my side of the house?"

His distracted demeanor and quiet tone told her that he wasn't fully aware of her presence. Moving to the offending paper, she bent and picked it up, putting it on his desk without looking, requiring major effort on her part. The urge to look was almost overwhelming. "What's up? Get a jury duty summons or something?" she smirked.

His eyes had followed the paper from the floor to the desk and he let out a small breath as she placed it on the desk in front of him. Obvious relief settled over his body. "Ah, no…" he said flatly. Finally he looked at her.

She saw the resignation in his eyes, and disappointment. Something in that paper had taken away hope, but hope for what? "So, you going to tell me what that piece of paper did to ruin your day?"

Jim's eyes glanced back at t he paper as an inner debate played across his face. Finally he shrugged in resignation. _She's not going to leave until I tell her…._

"Nothing really. It is an itinerary for my high school reunion. I was thinking about going this year but…I don't think so."

"High school reunion," she said, intrigue lacing her voice. "That sounds like fun. I went to one of mine and hardly recognized anyone there. _They _had gotten old," she said trying to let humor lighten the atmosphere.

Jim smirked and shook his head. "Well, if you think your class has gotten old…imagine mine. There was a group picture on the website that was taken at the last one. It looked like a picture for the parents of the class."

Catherine smiled. He was relaxing. "So what changed your mind about going?"

"That," he said with disgust as he pointed to the paper.

"May I?" she asked as she reached for it again. He nodded and she picked it up, reading the list of activities. Finishing, she looked across at the disgruntled man. "Sounds like fun. What's the problem?"

"Did you really read it? I mean look….everything is geared towards couples."

Catherine looked again and she understood what was bothering him. He wasn't a couple and there was nothing worse than being the odd man out at that kind of gathering, especially when everyone is trying to measure up to some long ago reputation that really has nothing to do with real life; living up to it or maybe living it down. "What is it about these things that brings all that teenaged angst flooding back?" she asked.

He smiled. "I dunno, but whatever it is….I'm not that guy anymore."

"So Jim, who was _that guy_? I'll bet you were a real menace in high school."

Jim chuckled. "I was. Full of attitude, thought I owned the world for awhile even. Then a judge got hold of me and showed me just what a big guy I was."

"A judge?"

"Yeah, I can still remember the sound of his gavel and the gravel in his voice as he gave me the choice of jail or The Marines. Somehow the Marines sounded like a better match to my sense of self importance. I would play the game and beat the Marines at it." He snorted, "yeah, right."

"You almost went to jail? What did you do?"

"Just stupid teenage stuff that got out of hand. I didn't know it then, but the judge did me a favor. The Marines straightened me out, showed me just how really important me and my in your face attitude was."

Catherine smiled. Obviously he didn't realize that he still carried a little of that attitude with him even now. But he had learned to use it to his advantage and could turn it on and off as the occasion required. "So back to the reunion, would you go if you were still married or had a date?"

"Yeah, I think I would. I've never been to one and, well….I'd just like to see how we all turned out, you know?"

Catherine studied his face, looking for signs of something deeper. And suddenly she knew. He wanted to see how _he_ had measured up against all that youthful potential and promise of high school. Jim was haunted by so many ghosts and after being shot, a greater sense of his own mortality. He needed to find out if his life measured up against the people he had grown up with. "So…if you had a date, you would go?" she asked again thoughtfully.

"Yeah," he grunted, eyeing her suspiciously.

"So, problem solved," she smiled. "I'll be your date."

"Catherine, I can't ask you to give up your vacation time to go on some warped trip down memory lane with a bunch of old hoodlums…." He was smiling but his face was sad.

"Oh no you don't, "she warned. "You are not backing out. I want to go. Finding out what you were like in high school….this could be a lot of fun, not to mention a lifetime of blackmail material."

"But, wouldn't you rather spend your time with Lindsey?"

"Yeah right. A whole week with a sixteen year old that hates me…."

Jim looked at her intently and she could tell that he was considering it.

"Tell you what," she said." I'll let you ease your guilt over dragging me to this thing by showing me New York. I've never been and I've always wanted to go. Newark is close to New York, right?"

"Well, yeah….are you sure about this?" She could see that his mood was lifting. He was even getting a little excited over it.

"You kidding me? I get enough ammunition to taunt you for the rest of your life and I get to see New York. Yeah, I'm sure!"

"Okay. Well, I'll pay for everything. All you have to do is show up and have some fun." He was smiling now, anticipating.

"Oh, I like fun," she winked. "So you'll make the arrangements and let me know what days I need to have off?"

"ASAP."

"Okay, well….guess I should get back to work. That is what we get paid for, isn't it?"

Jim chuckled, distracted. His mind was already at work on the travel plans. "Hey Catherine…" he called out as she started out the door. She turned and looked at him. "Yeah?"

"Thanks." He smiled. She winked and left.

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So, good beginning? The little button is there, please use it.


	2. Plans and Expectations

Jim made all the arrangements, checking with Catherine about what she would like to do while in New York and planning a few surprises as well. As the plans came together, she scheduled vacation time, giving herself an added day on either side of the trip for her own preparations and recovery.

All the guys at the lab gave her strange looks whenever the topic of the trip came up and she commented to Jim about it one night as they sat in his office discussing which Broadway plays she might enjoy. "I just don't get why they are looking at me like that," she complained. "I want to go _see _Phantom of the Opera, not sleep with him…"

Jim frowned a little. "That's the kind of looks they are giving you?"

"Yeah." Then she chuckled. "I can't decide which one of us they think the other one is taking advantage of; do they think I'm going on this trip to seduce you or is the other way around."

Jim sighed. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea," he lamented.

"No way you are backing out on this Jim Brass. No way! Besides, let them wonder…certainly can't hurt my reputation any; unless you are worried about yours?"

Jim grunted and then smirked. "I wish…guys like me would kill for the reputation of being able to score with women like you."

Catherine looked at him, perplexed. "What do you mean by that?"

Shrugging, Jim answered. "It's just….well, I'm not your type, you know. I'm the class clown and you are the homecoming queen. The two just never go together. Guys like me end up with Mary Sue from Home Ec and girls like you end up with the football jock."

"In high school maybe; but I'd like to think we cheerleader types do grow up and see men for who they are and not how they play with their balls." Jim started laughing. "What?" Catherine asked.

"How they play with their balls?" he answered, still chuckling.

"Oh," she said, giggling. "But it still fits…"

Jim shook with quiet laughter, nodding his head. "Okay…just, if those guys give you anymore grief, let me know. I'll bust their heads for it."

"Oh yeah, like I can see you landing one on Gil's jaw or taking Nick down….I don't think so."

"Gil is giving you funny looks too?" he asked incredulously.

"Not like the others, but he is wondering what's going on. I guess everything with Sara has made him more aware of human relationships."

"Not aware enough, evidently…"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, she is still 'visiting her mother' isn't she?"

"Yeah Jim, and he's still waiting for her to come back. But I think they do talk, so maybe there is hope."

"Yeah, right." He paused and then spoke quietly, as if speaking to himself. "No hope until he gets off his sorry ass and goes to get her back…"

Catherine smiled. "Jim Brass, you are _such _a romantic; I never would have guessed."

Jim adopted a goofy grin and then with his best toothless impression, replied. "Aw shucks Ma'm, even us ole geezers get a little tingle every now and again…"

Catherine smiled and then swatted his shoulder. "Geezer my ass, Jim. You still have what it takes to light a woman's fire. Just need to get out more….get back in the game."

Suddenly Jim's demeanor grew somber. "I don't know Catherine; I've been in the game and it hurts. I had hockey pucks to the face that made softer landings…."

Catherine looked at her friend thoughtfully. "Boy, you're ex really did a number on you…"

"Yeah, she did," Jim grimaced. "And she wasn't the only one." He shifted in his chair as painful memories flashed through his mind; then refocusing on the computer screen, his attitude changed. "So, you really want to go see Phantom?"

Catherine was surprised by his sudden change, but went along. "Ah, yeah… that would be a good choice or there's _Chicago_. Oh, and I've heard _Curtains_ was good. Oh and look at all the revivals….oh Jim, I never thought I would get the chance to see any of these actually on Broadway."

"Well, you realize that not all Broadway shows are musicals, don't you?"

"Well….yeah."

"There's one about Thurgood Marshall or here's one called November that seems to be about the elections."

"Oh, there's Macbeth. Gil would love that," Catherine smirked.

"Well, then let him buy the tickets."

"What Jim, you don't like Macbeth?" Catherine said in mock surprise.

"It's okay. Just more Gil than me."

They continued to scroll down the list and check availability for the dates they needed. Finally, Jim leaned back in his chair. "So, we have a list of ten shows and only two days to fit them into. So which are your top choices?"

Catherine smiled at him. "Surprise me." Then she stood up and left, winking as she turned at his door to head down the hall.

Jim sat, watching her go and wondering what he had gotten himself into this time. Then turning his attention back to the screen, he clicked a few times and the tickets were purchased. Leaning back, he smiled. Then an idea struck him and he leaned forward to plan a very special surprise.

_Two months later…_

"I can't believe that in two days, I'll be headed for New York," Catherine said to Gil as they sipped coffee in the break room.

"You're really excited about this trip, aren't you?" he smiled.

"I am. I've always wanted to go to New York."

"Jim seems excited too," Gil observed.

"Yeah, I think he is. He's anxious to see all his high school buddies."

Gil cocked his head and looked at her over his glasses. "Cath, are you sure that's all he's excited about?"

"What," she asked, confused.

"Well, I know if I were going on a trip like this with a beautiful woman, I'd be very nervous. And planning the trip has occupied most of his spare time for a couple of months… He's thought of little else. And most men, well they…"

"Oh Gil, come on. It's Jim. We've been friends for years. He knows that…" her voice faded as she looked across at her long time friend. "You don't really think that he might think…do you?"

"I don't know what to think. Jim's a lot smarter about these things than I am, but…he is shelling out a lot of money for this trip."

"Oh no….god, I hope he doesn't think that I …that …oh damn." She huffed and then looked across the table at him. "So why are you just now mentioning this?"

"I thought you might figure it out for yourself."

"What am I going to do? I mean if he does… well you know, expect something?"

"Be honest, I suppose."

"But I don't want to hurt him."

"He's a big boy, Catherine. I think he can handle it."

"Yeah, but I'm not sure I can."

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So we have Gil, the cluless one introducing the idea that something special might happen on this trip. Hmmm...

Oh well, reviews please. They make the little fingers type so much faster:-)


	3. The Flight

Jim picked Catherine up at her house and they headed to the airport. He teased her about the amount of luggage she had and she teased him about only needing to pack a toothbrush.

"Hey, I was a Marine. We learned to travel light in the jungle."

"Well, I hope we aren't going to a jungle," she chuckled.

"It's all a jungle. New York is just buildings instead of trees." He observed.

Check in went smoothly until they hit security. Jim's badge set the sensor's off. "Oh I forgot," he said sheepishly as he put the wallet in the basket that the security officer offered.. Stepping through the gate, he got the all clear and picked up his items from the basket.

"What, no gun?" Catherine teased him.

"I thought about it, but it's too much hassle anymore. Besides, this is a pleasure trip. I just picked up the badge out of habit."

Soon they were on the plane and heading east. "We land at La Guardia," Jim told Catherine.

"Isn't that in New York?"

"Yeah, I figured we'd land there, spend the first couple of nights in New York and then move over to Newark for the reunion. Then we'll head back to New York for one last night and then fly out of Kennedy in the next day."

"Isn't that terribly expensive…the nights in New York, I mean?"

"Nothing but the best for you, Catherine. You deserve it for agreeing to this thing in the first place."

"Oh come on, Jim. What are friends for?"

"Well, this is above and beyond and I do appreciate it. I want to be sure that you get something out of it too."

Catherine cast him a sideways glance. _He really is being very considerate…I wonder if this is how he treated his wife? I'll bet it was until things fell apart. _"Jim Brass, your ex was a fool."

Jim grimaced as he looked at her cautiously. "While I appreciate what you are saying, I wasn't always this handsome debonair guy sitting next to you. She had her reasons and although she had her share of the blame, I wasn't easy to live with either."

Catherine's mouth fell open. "I think that's the nicest thing you've ever said about her."

"Yeah, well," he said uncomfortably. "She is Ellie's mother…"

"Yeah, and we all know what that meant."

Jim looked at her, surprised. "You know?"

"Yeah, it sort of…well, it came out when you were shot. Gil wasn't too sure about her and he needed to talk to someone and I got elected. I'm sorry; I know it isn't something you want spread around."

"No, I don't. But I trust you…and Gil. I just…well, it just surprised me, that's all."

"It must've really hurt, finding out, I mean."

Yeah, it did," he answered as he turned to look out the window.

Catherine watched as his features settled into a bland expression. But the subtle working of his jaw and the way he was clenching his fingers, told her of his inner turmoil. She realized that as much as he wanted to go to this reunion, going back to Jersey was hard on him. There were too many memories….

Contrary to what Catherine believed he was thinking, he was really feeling shame; emasculated. _She must think I'm a real loser. First, I was afraid of going to this thing because of all the couples stuff and now she's telling me that she knows I was cuckolded and then wasn't man enough to kick the bitch out. Shit, this trip was a bad idea…_

Watching him, Catherine decided she needed to say something. Gingerly covering his hand with hers, she whispered. "Jim, now that you know I know…I can say something I've been thinking for a long time."

_Oh shit, here it goes…_he thought.

"I um, well….to overlook you r wife's…betrayal, and to take that baby and raise it as your own, well, I think there's something noble…heroic in all of that. I admire you for doing that Jim. I don't think I could've done that if Eddie had come home with some other woman's child."

"Yeah," he sighed, "well I didn't do such a good job. I wasn't there enough and so Ellie has taken after her mother. She's a whore in LA now, did you know that too?" His tone was bitter and his face grim.

"I knew she was into drugs, but I didn't know about the rest." _Oh god, he feels so guilty about it. How much more is he carrying around inside that we don't know about?" _Catherine watched as he blinked, fighting back tears. "Jim, I know you did your best for her, and would do whatever you could now if she would let you."

"Yeah, well…she won't. I pretty well screwed up any chances with her. I've had to accept that one day the phone will ring and someone will be telling me that she is dead."

Catherine couldn't imagine how she would manage with that kind of phone call about Lindsey. She squeezed his hand as she understood the weight of that daily burden on him. "Maybe not, maybe she'll figure it out before…"

He sighed again and then turned to look at her, a tear sitting in the corner of his eye. "I hope so, Catherine; I really hope so."

They sat quietly for a few minutes and then Catherine decided to venture into other territory. "So, you expecting many of your old buddies to be at this thing?"

He appreciated the change of subject. "I really don't know. I lost track of most of them, especially after I moved to Vegas."

Reflecting on her own high school days, Catherine smirked.

"What?" Jim asked as he watched her face.

"Oh nothing really. I was just thinking about how stupid I was in high school; all the stupid stunts I pulled."

"Like what? I'll bet I can top them…"

"Well, I snuck out one night and met this guy, Barry Fox. He was a year older. I was only fifteen at the time but was I looking for trouble. Anyway, Barry snuck me backstage at one of the clubs. His uncle owned it. It was a real eye opener."

"How?" He was smirking.

"The dancers were doing all kinds of things….drugs, having sex, two of them got into a fight…I thought it was very exciting…"

"Yeah, I'll bet," he grimaced.

"So Barry introduced me to this one male dancer; I can't even remember his name, but oh was he fine…a real hottie. And he had just come off the stage so he was all sweaty and I thought that was so…I don't know, sexy?"

"You think hot and sweaty is sexy? No wonder I can't get anywhere with women; I always try to clean up before spending time with them." His mood was lighter and he chuckled.

Catherine grinned. "Well, this Catherine appreciates men who do but that Catherine, well….she was kind of dumb. Anyway, I flirted outrageously with him and was so excited when he acted interested. He started coming on to me and I thought things were going to progress. Problem was, I had no idea of the fire I was playing with. But Barry's uncle happened to walk backstage and saw me with the hunk and told Barry to take me home immediately."

"Damn, spoiled all your fun." Jim grinned.

"I thought so. Then Sam came over the next day and the fun really went out the window. Seems Barry's uncle knew that Sam was a friend of the family and told him about me being there. Sam was really upset with me and with Mom for letting me out."

Jim's brow furrowed as he listened. "Seems like Sam was trying to be a father to you, even if he wasn't claiming the right."

"Yeah, looking back I guess he was." Catherine's expression turned somber.

"So that's the best you got?"

"Well, no…but I wouldn't want to embarrass you…"

"You know me; I don't embarrass easily. Come on…give…."

"Only after you share…" she chuckled.

"Okay, let's see….Yeah, here's one. My buddy Corky Simms and I told our parents were staying at each other's place and then snuck out. We went across town and talked our way into Madame Fargo's. It was the local whore house and all the guys were always trying to get in."

"That's it? You snuck into a brothel? No details?"

"What, you wanna hear how I became a man?" Jim snickered.

Laughing, Catherine nodded. "Yeah, this should be good."

Jim turned a little red, especially his ears. "Yeah…well, it didn't happen that night."

"No?"

"No. Corky and I were taken to a room and one of the girls went in with us. She offered to …well, you know…'show us how to be men' for free. For some reason, she thought we were cute."

"Wait; how old were you?"

"Fourteen."

"Oh my…"

"Yeah. Needless to say, she began undressing and we both popped our corks before she ever even touched us."

Catherine giggled. "Oh Jim….that's too funny. I can't picture you so ….innocent."

"Well, it _was_ a long time ago. Anyway, the owner recognized Corky; his dad was a local judge so we got hustled out in a hurry."

"So when did you 'become a man?"

"Later. But you have to share another one first," he teased.

"Okay, well…my friend Lenore had a sleep over and there were ten of us girls. Some of the guys came over after her parents went to bed and we ended up playing strip poker."

"Catherine, you're a terrible poker player."

"Yeah, well….I was even worse then. I lost big time. But I thought it was very exciting at the time, having all those boys looking at me."

"So how old?"

"Fifteen. You know, I get so upset at some of the stunts Lindsey pulls and thinking back…"

"Yeah, well I won't tell her what a trollop you were in high school."

"Trollop?" She was laughing.

"Hey, I'm trying to be nice here." He grinned.

"Okay, so your turn."

"Well, about my manhood…I was fifteen and she was Laurel Smith. She was decent looking and had a set of…" He looked trapped.

"Of what Jim?"

"Uh….well, she um…was stacked?"

"Uh huh." Her eyes were twinkling with amusement at his discomfort. "And?"

"Well, I was on the hockey team and she liked hockey and hockey players. Turned out I was just one of many that she …favored."

"Yeah, so ….details."

"It was after a game. I'd had a pretty good game and was feeling pretty pumped up over it. She was waiting outside the locker room and came up to me when I came out. We ended up under the bleachers with her doing things that I thought only the Playboy bunnies did. She definitely knew what she was doing, which was a good thing 'cause I didn't have a clue."

"So you never really dated her or anything?"

"No." He got quiet for a minute. "To be honest, it was kind of disappointing. I mean, I really didn't even like the girl. When it was all said and done, I didn't really have a very good feeling about it."

Looking at him, she felt something warm inside. "I kind of thought, well…I mean when you first got to Vegas, you always seemed to be playing the field, always had different women in tow."

"Yeah, I was still stinging from my ex. I didn't want anything too personal. So I'd go out with someone a time or two and then move on."

"Oh," she sighed. "I assumed that…well that you, well, everyone thought you were a player…you know slept around."

"Slept with them?" He looked at her incredulously. Then he chuckled. "No. I was feeling pretty hollow then but not that bad. No, I'm not interested in one night stands or anything like that. I dunno, I want…well, I guess I want things to mean something, you know?"

"Yeah, I do." She patted his hand and smiled. After a moment she looked up at him. "I'm glad we're getting this time with each other. We're always so busy with cases or just trying to unwind. I feel like there's this whole side to you that I'm just now discovering."

"Just the same old me," he smiled. "But yeah, I'm glad too."

Their flight continued but the need to talk had subsided. Both were content with the quiet as they flew east. Jim's silence was due the many memories flooding back and how he might deal with them over the weekend. Catherine, on the other hand, was seriously reconsidering the personal side of Jim Brass. They had always had the fact that they were parents as a common bond that the others on the team did not share, and they both had first hand knowledge of the seedier side of life. But now she was seeing him in a different light and she found it somewhat confusing, although she couldn't understand why.

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Okay first, if you haven't responded to my poll please take a moment to do so. It is on my profile page. It's just for fun but the results are getting interesting.

Next, reviews are a real pick me upper! I love 'em; especially ones with constructive criticism. Please take the time to let me know what you think as the story progresses. Even through in some ideas; I might just use them.

Last; a simple thank you for reading. It's never any fun to write what no one wants to read.


	4. Bedazzled

Catherine was impressed by the way Jim negotiated their way once they landed in New York. He led her to the baggage claim where he teased her again about the amount of luggage she brought. Then they made their way to the curb where he hailed a taxi.

She marveled as they drove through the city, looking out of the windows fascinated. Finally they pulled up in front of their hotel."Jim!" Catherine exclaimed when she realized where the taxi had taken them. "The Waldorf Astoria?"

He smiled. "Told you, nothing but the best for you, Catherine. Although, the most I could afford was a one bedroom suite. I figured I would sleep on the sofa, if that's okay with you?"

"Okay? Yeah…but really, it's too much."

"Can't cancel now. And no, it's not too much. Come on, let's get checked in and get a bite to eat. I'm starving."

Catherine studied the art deco surroundings as she stood, waiting for Jim to finish the check in procedure. A few minutes later they were in the suite and Catherine was immediately drawn to the window. "It's amazing."

Chuckling, Jim responded. "It's the Big Apple." He stood behind her a little to the side where he was able too see some of her expression as she looked out over the city. Suddenly he was very glad that they were having a few days in the city. Her excitement was worth the extra time and expense.

Catherine sensed him watching her and slowly turned to see a twinkle in his eyes. _He doesn't twinkle like that as much as he used to,_ she thought. _I miss that look on him._ Their eyes met and a small smile crept across his face, which she responded to with a smile of her own.

"Better get settled and then I thought we'd grab something to eat somewhere close by. We have the theater tonight," Jim reminded her.

"Right…which show is tonight?"

"_Curtains_. I heard it got all sorts of Tony nominations and awards, so it should be good."

"Good. Okay, well, just let me hang out my dress for tonight and then we can go find food. I know you are hungry."

After they ate, they came back to the suite and began preparing for the evening. Jim showered and changed into his shirt and slacks so Catherine could have full use of the bathroom as long as she needed. She soaked in the luxurious tub and then began her process of getting dressed. Eventually Jim called to her through the bedroom door that they need to leave in about twenty minutes.

Sitting on the sofa, Jim looked up when the bedroom door opened and Catherine walked out. His face lit up as he saw her and he stood in awe. "Wow," he exclaimed as he eyed every detail of her appearance. The blue/green of her dress was perfect for her coloring and matched her eyes, setting them off. Fitting snugly over her torso, the dress fell loosely over hips to her knees giving it motion as she walked. The neckline was daring yet not too revealing, teasing Jim with what he couldn't see. "You look…amazing," he finally said, after catching his breath.

Enjoying the effect that she was having on Jim, Catherine smiled. "Thank you. You look very nice yourself," she said as she noted his stylish suit. "I love that tie; the colors set off your eyes," she commented. _Indeed they do, _she thought_. The blues and grays in the tie liven up his eyes. _Catherine found herself looking at Jim from a new perspective. _I never noticed his outline under his shirt before; he has muscle under there. _Her eyes glanced over the rest of him, coolly appraising him as something more than a co-worker and friend. _He's got a tight ass for guy his age too, but those eyes…he could break hearts with those eyes._

Jim slipped into his jacket and even though his tie really didn't need straightening, Catherine stepped close to him to adjust it "There…perfect," she said as she finished and patted him on his lapel, smiling.

Her interest in adjusting his tie surprised Jim. He knew it was straight, he had been very careful to get it right when he tied it about five minutes before she had emerged from the bedroom. His brain was spinning the possibilities and he spent the ride to the theater in confusion. Once they entered the theater however, thoughts of the tie and her attention to detail fell away as he was caught up in her excitement. Catherine had once confided to him that she had dreamed of being a Rockette when she was young. Sitting in the theater, he wondered if perhaps she had dreamed of Broadway as well. The action on the stage had her full attention as she watched, spellbound. Captivated by her obvious delight with the show and their surroundings in the theater, he was pleased to see her so happy.

Confusion set in again however, when half way through the last act, Catherine worked her hand between his arm and body and wrapped her arm around his, leaning into his shoulder and resting her head against him. It wasn't that he minded; he liked the sensation of her so near to him. But he wasn't sure what she meant by it. Was she just resting her head or was there something more to it? And if there was, what was it? _What's she up to? _He wondered.

After the show, they made their way back to the street, Catherine firmly holding onto Jim's hand. Taxis were available and Jim had them in one quickly. He was somewhat surprised once they had settled in the back seat to realize that she still hadn't let go of his hand. He tried to listen as she babbled about the show and how wonderful it was and what she liked best, but his mind was grappling with all of the physical contact of the last couple of hours. _She's always been one for a quick hug or a pat on the arm, but holding hands? Does she even realize she's doing it? Does she realize it's me?_ Jim was becoming more and more perplexed.

Back at the hotel, she glanced over at him and suggested that they visit one of the bars for a nightcap. That's how Jim suddenly found himself in a cozy corner of the Peacock Alley Bar wishing the hell he knew what Catherine was up to and wondering what it would be like to kiss her. _No, no, strike that thought,_ he told himself. _You know what kissing her would be like, it'd be unbelievable. But no, don't go there._ He watched as she sipped her drink, looking around elatedly.

Her eyes took in all of the surroundings as if she were recording everything. _Maybe she is… _"I'm surprised all of this excites you so much. I mean, you have been to some of the best casinos and clubs in Vegas," he commented.

"Yeah, but this is New York!" Suddenly her eyes turned back to him, boring into his. There's so much to be excited about. And I'm here with you…"

_Damn, what did that mean? _"Yeah, well I guess it is different," he offered. _Lame Brass, really lame. _

Catherine chuckled. "Yeah…and it makes me feel different. And you seem different too, Jim."

"Just the same ole me," he smiled. _Okay, that's it. She's just caught up in all the excitement. Don't read too much into anything she does._

"Well, the same ole you looks pretty good here in the Big Apple. Why am I just discovering this side of you, Jim?"

"Well," he shrugged. "It's hard to be charming over dead bodies and across interrogation tables."

Her warm eyes settled on him and then seemed to be analyzing. "You've always had a certain charm Captain Brass, but you are so relaxed and comfortable with yourself here. And there's a little different attitude…"

_Comfortable? She thinks I'm comfortable. I'm sitting with a gorgeous woman, who up until now I've never allowed myself to look at as anything but a friend, in a bar with our hotel room just a few floors up and I have no idea what she expects but she's looking at me differently and she thinks I'm comfortable? Geez… _"Yeah well, no dead bodies to stumble over…" He grimaced inwardly…_still lame Jimmy Boy. Get it together before you make a complete ass of yourself. Yeah right, like you haven't already?_

A set of sultry blue eyes looked at him through long lashes as she thanked him for a wonderful evening. "I really did enjoy the play," she said. "Everything had been perfect so far. I think I'm getting the better part of the deal…"

Riveted by her gaze Jim sat dumbly, unable to think of anything cohesive to say. _Come on asshole, you haven't been this awkward since high school. _"Thank you," he finally managed.

After their nightcaps they headed up in the elevator. As soon as they made it to the room, she kicked off her shoes and headed for the bedroom. "Changing into something more comfortable," she informed him as she disappeared behind the door.

Bewildered, Jim stood frozen in the middle of the room for a few seconds. "_Something more comfortable? Damn, what's that mean? Is she coming out in sweatpants and a tee shirt or something more…well, less …Dammit Brass, stop it. She is your friend, has been for a long time. Too late to go thinking anything else about her, not that you'd stand a snowball's chance in hell… _Nervousness was setting in.

He kicked off his shoes and loosened his tie. Slipping out of his jacket he tossed it across the back of a chair and shedding his tie completely, tossed it over the jacket. While unbuttoning his collar, he went to the wetbar to investigate. "I need another drink_,_" he growled. Opening the cabinet door, he was impressed by the selection. A quick survey revealed what he was looking for, scotch. Once he had poured himself a glass, he carried it over to the sofa and sat down. Taking a big gulp, he swallowed and then whispered to himself, "sure is taking a long time to change into sweats…" Spying the remote on the table, he clicked on the tv. "Maybe there's a game on," he said to the empty room. _Need something to bring my mind back to reality…_

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_So, the pressure is beginning to build! Now what? Reviews help the process along..._


	5. Things That Go Bump in the Night

Thanks to those who have reviewed! It keeps me going. You are doing so wonderfully well in that department that I decided to give you an extra long chapter, at least long for me. Hope you enjoy.

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Jim was channel surfing when he heard the bedroom door open. Glancing up, he saw Catherine walk into the room wearing red silk pajamas and a robe. _Better than sweats, not provocative like some other nighttime clothing might be…safe, thank God. Still...she looks damn sexy..._ He smiled. "I was just looking for a game but if there is something you'd rather watch?"

"Game is okay," she said languidly. "I just want to relax awhile anyway."

"Oh hey, the bar is well stocked. You want anything?"

"No, I don't think so. If I change my mind, I'll find it." She walked over and sat on the sofa next to him, close but not too close.

Jim stopped at a channel that had the Yankees and settled in to the sofa to watch. Catherine curled her feet under her and leaned sideways into the sofa. He heard the announcer say it was the bottom of the eighth inning, so there wouldn't be much more game to watch anyway. He tried to pay attention to what was happening on the screen but he couldn't help but glance over at his companion.

_And here we go with the bottom half of the inning…" droned the announcer._

Out of the corner of his eye, Jim saw Catherine close her eyes, a contented smile on her face.

_First pitch... ball one…_

Her head began to slide down the back of the couch and she jerked. Resting her arm under her head, her eyes slowly shut.

_Batter is ready…and here's the pitch…strike! That looked like a sinker…rambled the announcer_

The arm didn't help much and Catherine shifted her position slightly so that the back of her head was against the sofa.

_Catcher gives the sign and here's the pitch…another ball…_

Shifting again, Catherine settled closer to Jim, making him squirm in his place.

_And here's the windup and... its strike two!_

Jim took another long gulp of his scotch and glanced at Catherine again…

_And the ump calls a ball, but it really was close. Let's look at our computer graphic and see if the ump called it correctly…_

Jim watched the little red box on the screen and decided the ump could see after all. Then he felt Catherine on the move again.

_Okay so…full count. And the wind up…_the crack of the bat was heard over the tv and Jim watched the ball as it flew towards right field. Suddenly he felt her next to him, her head leaning on his shoulder. He lifted his arm to the back of the sofa and she squirmed in even closer, her head resting on the inside of his shoulder with his arm cradling her head and his hand resting over her upper arm. Even though he felt a little uneasy, he welcomed the opportunity to hold her.

_And it onehops to the right fielder for a single. And here's the next batter in the box…_

Jim groaned inwardly. _A single…getting to first base…maybe gonna score...damn it Jim, quit it. Concentrate on the baseball game, not the game playing in your head. __Okay, next batter is A_._ Rod. Wonder if he'll hit a home run._ Looking down at the top of her head and filling his nostrils with the scent of her hair, his stomach suddenly felt like there was a pinball game going on inside. Her arm moved, wrapping around his waist, sending a warm rush through his body. Jim swallowed, cursed himself and then punched the remote. _No home runs for you, Jimmy Boy. _"Hey Catherine, I'm kind of tired. How about we call it a night?"

She lifted her head and yawned. "Yeah, me too. Do you have everything you need… pillow, blankets…"

"Yeah, all in the drawer under the tv. I'm good."

"Okay, well, I'll see you in the morning. Thanks again for a wonderful evening."

Yeah, I really had a good time too," he smiled. "Get a good night's rest; you've got a full day tomorrow."

He watched as she disappeared behind the bedroom door, part of him relieved and another part disappointed that she was gone. Crazy thoughts rambled through his head as he finished his drink; at least he thought they were crazy. Images of her played in his mind, some real memories and some newly created fantasies, all of them stimulating. _Whoa now, settle down. She is your friend…got it? Friend! You've never looked at her as anything but a co worker and friend, no need to change that now. _Glancing back at the door, he sighed. _Like it would matter anyway; she's out of your league Jimmy Boy._ He knocked back the last few drops of his scotch and then began preparing for bed.

Once he was settled on the couch, the movie reel began playing in his mind again. He remembered Catherine from when he'd first moved to Vegas and little scenes played out over the years that had stuck with him. A grimace formed on his face as he remembered the pain when he woke up at the hospital and Gil commenting about his fan club. Catherine's was the first face he saw when he looked through the glass wall. He had a fuzzier memory of coming out of it and seeing Ellie with Grissom and Catherine. Catherine had looked frightened; he found out later why. Apparently he had died and been brought back. Subconsciously he rubbed the scar on his right shoulder where he'd taken the bullet as he thought about how attentive she had been during his recovery. Two or three times a week she would show up bringing food or a movie and spending time with him. He'd appreciated it immensely because it broke the boredom of his recovery. And they had gotten a little closer through all of that.

Fast forwarding, he recalled how angry and scared he'd been when he heard about her abduction and the whole story of her waking up at the motel thinking she had been raped. The subsequent kidnapping of Lindsey had nearly sent her over the edge and as he recollected his feelings of helplessness in the situation, his neck began to tense. But they had found Lindsey and it had been Jim that led the way into the house. Determination had propelled him through the door and steadied his hand when he saw the gun in the kidnapper's hand. Relief had frozen him as he watched Catherine take Lindsey into her arms and hold her, but anger lingered in his gut that they had been put through the ordeal.

In all of those years, through all of their shared experiences, happy times and sad times, it had never occurred to Jim Brass to think of her in any sort of romantic way. _Well, not since the first week after I got to Vegas…_he mused honestly. _Didn't take long to realize I wasn't her type. Besides, she was still married to Eddie then._ He frowned momentarily as a thought fluttered through his mind. _But why not after Eddie? Why didn't you…come on dumbass, you knew it would be pointless. She'd never give you a second look._

His eyes grew heavy and just as he was about to slip into oblivion, another thought scurried through his brain._ So what was all the touchy feely tonight? And she sure seemed to be looking just before we left for the theater. Oh geez, stop thinking like a teenager; you're too old for these games._

He forced his mind to clear and began to settle into the fog of sleep again when his thoughts turned back to the conversation on the plane. Visions of Catherine playing and losing at strip poker played through his head until finally sleep claimed him and his brain quieted; well, at least as far as he was aware. Sometimes dreams are forgotten upon awakening. Which is what happened when he woke up sometime during the night, urgently needing the bathroom. "Too many damned drinks," he muttered grumpily as he headed for the bedroom door. When he reached it, he realized that it was closed. _Damn, what does that mean? Was it shut out of habit or is it a keep out sign? Doesn't matter…gotta go to the bathroom. _As quietly as he could he opened the door and stepped into the room. It was darker in the bedroom so he paused to give his eyes a chance to adjust. Spotting the bathroom door he started inching his way over, peeking towards the bed to be sure he wasn't disturbing the sleeping Catherine.

Suddenly a sharp pain radiated through his toe and up his foot as his little toes came into contact with a table leg. "Shit," he cried out in pain, reaching toward his foot in a useless effort to quell the throbbing.

"Jim?" called out a sleepy sounding Catherine.

"Yeah…sorry," he said between clenched teeth.

She turned on the bedside lamp and looked across the room at him. Her eyes squinted in response to the sudden light and she looked half asleep. "You okay?"

"Yeah," he grunted. "Stubbed my toe on the table here."

"What? Why did you do that?"

"Oh, I dunno Catherine. It's my little toe and I decided that it needed to match my big toe; you know, add symmetry to my foot…" he growled sarcastically.

Catherine's mouth fell open. Then she closed it in a huff. "Touchy aren't we?" she snarled.

"Damn…"he sighed, still clutching his foot. "Look, I'm sorry. I was trying to get to the bathroom and caught my toe on the table leg. And dammit, it hurts."

Laughter filled the room as she scooted out of the bed and headed over to him. "Let me see your toe."

"No, it's okay…" he said, quickly covering it with his hand.

"Oh no you don't, Jim. You woke me up in the middle of the night and I'm going to see what all the commotion was about."

He uncovered his foot and gingerly held it out for her to see his toe. "I think maybe I broke it," he moaned.

She looked closely at it and then carefully touched it. "Maybe. It's beginning to swell. Go sit on the bed and I'll get some ice." She went into the other room and left him standing by the table. He looked across at the bed and began to hobble, mumbling obscenities all the way. Once he reached the bed, he froze. Staring at it as if the fires of hell were gathered in that one spot, he debated the wisdom of him sitting on _her_ bed. _This is getting far too close for comfort,_ he mused.

He heard her coming back and turned, bumping the toe on the leg of the bed, sending him into another frenzy of socially unacceptable words. Catherine reached his side and pushed him onto the bed. "What was that?" he bellowed.

"Just trying to get you on the bed before you do something else to that poor toe and your yelping gets us thrown out of the place," She snickered.

Again holding his toe, he looked up at her sheepishly. "Sorry."

She sat next to him and pulled his hand away from the offended toe. Cautiously she covered it with the ice pack she'd fashioned out of the plastic bag for the ice bucket liner and ice from the little refrigerator.

"Uh, Catherine?"

"Yeah?"

"I um, well…I still need to get to the bathroom."

"Oh yeah. Well, hurry before the ice melts."

He stood and hobbled to the bathroom, his toe throbbing with every step. A few minutes later, he came out, feeling better in at least one department. Limping back to the bed, he lifted his foot to check out the toe.

"Ouch," Catherine exclaimed.

"Yeah," he groaned as he looked at the puffy troublemaker. "It's turning purple already."

"Ice," she said as she covered it again with the makeshift ice pack. They leaned back against the headboard, both feeling awkward. Then Catherine began to chuckle.

"What?" Jim looked at her suspiciously.

"Nothing,"

"That was _not_ 'nothing."

"I was just thinking," she said as she stared towards the foot of the bed.

"Wanna let me in on it since it is obviously amusing?"

"I was thinking about feet," she grinned.

"What about feet?" He was really guarded now, wondering where she was going with this.

"It's just…you know…feet are just such strange creations; funny really when you look at them closely."

Jim looked down at their feet. He looked at hers and a smile tugged at the corners of his mouth. "Your feet don't look funny. They are sleek and graceful looking."

Catherine tilted her head to look at him. "Thank you. I don't think anyone has ever complimented my feet before."

Jim glanced at his own feet and grimaced. Catherine caught his expression and started chuckling again. "I have ugly feet," he complained.

"You do not! You just have…cop feet," she managed to say before erupting into giggles.

Jim watched her giggling, chagrinned. "Cop feet? Wait, no, no, no…don't answer that. I don't think I want to know," he smirked.

She tried to stop her giggles and shook from the effort. "Oh, I'm sorry," she said as another burst erupted. "Your feet are just fine; they fit you…" she was able to say as she began to settle down.

Jim gave her a sideways glance and grinned. He had to admit that he didn't exactly have pretty feet. Besides, he liked it when she laughed. His foot was freezing but as he sat on the bed next to Catherine in her silky red pajamas, Jim was aware of other parts of his body that were beginning to get rather warm. _This isn't good,_ he thought. "Look, there's no sense in both of us losing sleep over this. I'll just go back to the couch and you can get some shut eye."

"You sure? I don't mind sitting up with you…and that ice will need refreshing in a few minutes."

He looked into her concerned blue eyes and felt glued to his spot. Glancing away, he found a spot on the carpet that demanded his attention. "Yeah, I'll be okay," he said without conviction.

An understanding smile played at the corners of Catherine's mouth as she watched him stare at the floor. "I have an idea. Why don't you just lie down on the bed. That way, I'll be right here to change the ice when you need it."

Jim's eyes got huge. Catherine couldn't ever remember seeing him so surprised or panicked. "Uh, no…that … it isn't necessary. Really, I'll be fine," he said as stood up, wincing from the pain.

"Yeah, right," she answered. Grabbing his tee shirt, she pulled him back down on the bed, turned and fluffed a pillow and then pointed. "Now scoot."

He could feel the tips of his ears turning red. _Now what? _He looked up at Catherine and saw in her eyes that she knew exactly what was bothering him. _Ohhh shit._

"Jim Brass, do you really believe after all the years you've known me that I would take advantage of an injured friend like that? No way. That toe is going to be completely healed before I have my way with you," she chuckled.

"But Catherine, I… well, this isn't … I hadn't planned on…" He stopped to catch his breath and collect his brain. "What I'm trying to say is…it was never my intention to sleep in your bed."

A warm smile lit her face as she reached over to stroke his cheek. "I know Jim. And you've been every bit the gentleman. But you don't need to walk all the way back into the other room right now and you will need help with the ice. And what if you have to go to the bathroom again? I'd offer to sleep on the couch myself if that would make you more comfortable, but I kind of like this bed; it's very comfortable. And I think we are both mature enough to handle this situation; I mean, it's not like either of us is a hormone crazed teenager anymore, right?"

Jim looked at her doubtfully. "Speak for yourself, sister," he chuckled. Relenting, he scooted to his assigned sleeping place. She grabbed the ice pack and disappeared into the other room for more ice. She came back and grabbed a towel from the bathroom. Putting the ice on his toe, she wrapped the towel around it. "Maybe that will keep you from soaking the bed," she commented. He grunted and tried to relax as she settled in on the other side of the bed. "Thank God for king sized beds," he mumbled as she turned off the light.

He heard her giggle in the darkness. "By the way Jim…."

"Yeah?"

"Are your feet ticklish?"

"Don't even think it…" he warned.

"It's just that, for some people anyway, the feet are a very ticklish spot. Just want to be sure that I know what to expect…"

He lay there quietly a few minutes. Then, "Catherine?"

"Yeah?"

"It is a comfortable bed."

"Yeah," she yawned. "Good night Jim."

"Yeah…"

As Catherine drifted to sleep, she wondered how many men could be so much fun in bed …without sex.

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Wasn't what you expected, was it? Hey it's Jim and Catherine, there has to be humor involved, right? You know how it works...you push the little button and type and then I type alot and then you get to read more:-) Hope you enjoyed the latest installment. There's more in the works.


	6. Fifth Ave

Jim woke up to the sensation that he was being watched. Slowly he opened his eyes and was met by a soft gaze from another set of blue eyes. He felt off balance and at a loss for what he should do. A little voice told him to get up, but he felt strangely comfortable with her eyes looking into his. Tempted to glance away, he forced himself to remain still and hold the gaze. Turning his inner voices off and relaxing in the moment, he relished the sense of tranquility that settled over him. Time was suspended as they lay there, gazing at one another and Jim would never know if it had lasted a few seconds or many minutes, but it was a snapshot that would be etched in his memory forever.

He watched, captivated as a quiet smile settled on her lips. Her eyes still held his as she whispered, "good morning."

A flood of unnamed and nebulous emotions swelled in his chest and travelled upwards, pressuring the space behind his eyes. Something about this moment and her look stirred him in ways that he hadn't felt in a long time, maybe never. He didn't understand what he felt, he just knew that he wanted to stay in this moment forever and already mourned the sure knowledge that it would pass. A smile crept across his face but he didn't speak, afraid of shattering this…whatever it was he was feeling, whatever connection that was between them.

Her hand moved delicately to his face, her fingers tracing his smile and then brushing his morning stubble before resting on his cheek. His own hand found hers, covered it and then shifted it back to his mouth, where he kissed it. The squeezing it, he moved their hands to the mattress between them and continued to look into her eyes. That's when he saw it; she wanted to kiss him. He recognized the look and suddenly it alarmed him. _Geez, just kiss her, you ass; you know you want to. But no, _said another voice_, you know it will ruin everything. If you kiss her then everything will change. You could lose her friendship completely…_ He blinked as the battle raged within him, but the more reasonable voice won and he suddenly began backing out of the bed. "Uh, the bathroom," he groaned as he headed to the door. A glance over his shoulder told him everything. She was smirking at him; she knew what was going on better than he did.

They got dressed and Jim mentioned the complimentary breakfast. He had produced a backpack from his luggage and began stuffing breakfast items in it and then reached for a couple cartons of juice. "Come on," he said, grabbing her hand. "I know the perfect place."

They headed up the street several blocks and then crossed into Central Park. He led her along a path until it opened into a field, dotted with trees. He found a tree that provided ample shade and smiled at her. "Here," he said as he nodded at the spot. They sat and he opened the bag, taking the food out.

Catherine watched his action with curiosity. "What else is in there Jim? I can't believe you planned to have a pack just in case we decided to eat in Central Park."

He looked at her impishly. "Oh, you'll find out this afternoon. Until then, it's my secret." He saw the inquisitive expression in her eyes and knew she wasn't finished with the topic. Carefully he placed the bag on the side of him, opposite from her. "No fair peeking," he grinned.

They ate quietly, occasionally glancing at each other but also watching the joggers and strollers as they passed by. It was still early in the day but already the park was busy. "It's amazing," Catherine commented. "It is so quiet. You'd never know you were in the middle of a huge city."

"Yeah," commented Jim. "And I'd forgotten how green everything is back here."

Catherine looked around at the grass and trees and understood him. "Yeah, Vegas seems brown compared to this."

"Vegas _is_ brown," he replied.

Once they finished breakfast, he found a trash can and then they headed across the park. "Ever been to F.A.O. Swartz?" he asked.

"I've been to the one in Vegas a couple of times…"

"It's great but not like the mother ship here," he said as he pointed to the store. "Remember the movie 'Big?"

"That was this store?"

"Yeah. Want to go in?"

"Sure."

So they crossed the street and entered. They spent some time in the store, checking out the various displays and games, even playing with a few. They finally made their way out into the sunshine and Jim looked around, getting his bearings. Then taking her hand he led Catherine down Fifth Ave.

The Trump Towers had astonished her. "It's so _golden_," she had exclaimed as they wandered through the lobby and peeked into the shops on the ground floor. As they continued the walk down the avenue, Jim was amused by Catherine's window shopping. She stopped and peered into each window, studying the display and commenting. Some she found exciting and a few brought derogatory remarks. Cartier and Tiffany's definitely received a lot of attention as she ogled the jewelry in their windows. She also spent longer amounts of time in front of the Prada, Versace, and Gucci stores. Then, of course, there were many others to see also. "I can't believe they put those colors together," she said as she frowned at the latest display. "You know, we could go into some of these places," he suggested.

"What, and have my bubble burst?" she chuckled. "As long as I'm out here criticizing their displays, I can pretend that I really can afford but don't care to own what's inside."

"Oh geez, Catherine. You are one of Sam Braun's heirs; you telling me you can't afford _something _from one of these places?"

"All of that is tied up in The Eclipse. I won't see any of his money for years. But it's okay. I'm having fun just looking."

Finally they arrived at Rockefeller Center. Glancing at his watch, Jim suggested they grab a bite to eat. "What? Hungry again?" Catherine teased.

"You know me…" Jim shrugged. He nodded towards the Dean & Deluca Café. "That's good," he suggested.

They enjoyed the food and also the window seat, where they could watch the activities around the Center. As she finished her last bite, Catherine looked across at Jim. "So, what's next?"

"Radio City Music Hall. I know you dreamed of being a Rockette once. We'll go see where they hang out."

Her eyes lit up. "Yeah, that sounds great. But Jim, what about your foot? I know that toe has to be throbbing with all the walking."

"A little; but I'm okay. We'll see Radio City and then head over to the hotel. It's only a couple of blocks. I can take a time out before we have to get ready for dinner and the theater."

Surely you'll have more than just a short time out. Radio City Music Hall can't take that long, can it?"

"You never know…" he answered, his eyes twinkling.

They headed across the street and into the lobby. A young man was there, ready for visitors. Jim stepped over to him. "Where do we go for the Rockette Experience?" he asked.

The man looked at Jim and then at Catherine. "Oh yes…you're the couple from Vegas. I was told to expect you. Please, just wait her a moment." The man disappeared behind a door.

Catherine looked a t Jim curiously. "Okay, what's going on?"

Jim handed her his backpack. "You're going to need this," he smiled.

"What? Okay, give," she said as she began to unzip it.

"Lindsey helped me and packed your things. They have this workshop for dance students and I signed you up. It's sort of a taste of the whole Rockette thing."

"But Jim, I haven't done that kind of dancing in years."

"Lindsey told me you practice with her all the time. Besides, you always wanted to be a Rockette; here's your chance…for a day anyway. Only thing is, most of the participants will be kids, you know dance students starting out."

"Right…and I'm supposed to keep up with them…"

"No. You are supposed to have fun and live your dream, if only for a few hours." He was smiling, but as she looked into his eyes she saw how serious he was about this.

Jim was trying to give her something special and so Catherine gave in. "Okay, I'll do it," she smiled. "And I'll show those kids a thing or two while I'm at it."

A small chuckle erupted from deep within Jim's chest. "I bet you will."

A middle aged woman stepped out with the young man and introduced herself. "Ms. Willows?" she asked.

Catherine nodded. "Please, call me Catherine. And…I'm really sorry about this. I realize you usually have students for this thing. Jim here insisted…"

"Yes, Mr. Brass was quite insistent. But occasionally we bend the rules and he assures me that you can dance. It is quite strenuous, however. If at any time you need to take a break, please do. But we want you to enjoy the afternoon. I understand that you once dreamed of being a Rockette?" The woman continued talking as she led Catherine away.

Jim stood, smiling as he watched them leave. Then he turned to the man. "Hey, can I get back in if I leave for a little while?"

"Sure. Let me give you a pass. Someone will be here. It might be me depending on when you come back. I have a tour to run in a few minutes and then I come back to door duty."

"Okay, thanks." Jim pocketed the pass and headed out the door. By the time he returned, the young man was back at the door and when he saw Jim, he called him over. "They are out on the stage now, if you would like to watch."

"Yeah, that'd be great…"

He followed the man through the hall and into the theater. There was a group of parents huddled together near the front, watching as their children went through the steps they had learned in the first part of the workshop. Catherine was easily the tallest in the group and for a minute Jim was worried that this had been a bad idea. He was afraid that she was feeling terribly out of place. But as he watched her face, he realized she was having a good time with it. He settled into a seat about half way in, away from the parents. He wanted to concentrate on her and not have to be polite to the strangers. Watching in awe as Catherine moved gracefully around the stage, he was glad he had pushed so hard to get her in this thing. She looked like she truly belonged up there. Finally they were in a line and he realized they were doing the famous Rockette high kick. He chuckled as he watched her try to match her leg height to the other dancers. While they had to kick as high as they could, she had to hold back a little until the director finally called to her, "Let it go, Catherine. Show us what you can do." So Catherine did. Her leg went high standing out above the others and as Jim's eyes followed her on the stage, he felt a strange sensation in the pit of his stomach. _She's amazing, _he thought. _She's so graceful and full of energy…hasn't had a lesson in years and she outshines them all…_He swallowed, pride and something else mingling in his chest as he continued to watch. _Of course she's graceful you idiot. She always had been. She's one of a kind, a star and you know it…why else would you have gone back to Tiffany's?"_ He patted his jacket pocket, happy with his little trip back up Fifth Ave. _I just hope she likes it. I couldn't afford much, but it seemed appropriate…_

When the workshop concluded, he met her at the front door. She had changed back into her street clothes and looked tired but happy. "Wow," she breathed. "That was quite a workout."

"Yeah, but you seemed to be keeping up with all those kids."

"Yeah, I did…didn't I," she smiled. "It was fun. But how did you manage it?" she asked as she handed him the bag.

They stepped out onto the street and he guided her back to the hotel. "I just made a few phone calls," he told her. "Lindsey put together the tights and shoes and all. She was very helpful about what kind of dance instruction you'd had too. They insisted that you had to have had some kind of formal training."

Catherine stopped on the sidewalk and looked at him. "Jim you didn't tell them…I mean, they don't know about…"

"I told them you had danced professionally in Vegas as a young woman. I didn't say where and they never asked. They seemed to assume you were a show girl at one of the casinos or theaters. They have no idea that you were at the Palace."

"Thank you. I know a lot of people wouldn't understand the distinction, but…"

"Catherine, it doesn't matter where you are or what you are doing…you are a class act and it shows. That's all they needed to know."

Catherine was relieved to hear that he hadn't revealed her past. But more importantly, what he'd said about her played through her mind as they headed back to the hotel. _He thinks I'm classy…_

As they walked into the lobby of the hotel, Jim asked her a question. "Hey, do you have a cocktail dress that you can wear tonight?"

"I brought one, thinking I might need it Saturday for the dance at the reunion," she said looking at him curiously.

"Good, then wear it tonight." He was grinning mysteriously.

"To the theater?"

"Yeah…and for after."

"After?"

"Yeah, it's going to be a late night so maybe a soak in the tub and a short nap?" They were on the elevator by now.

"Ooookaaay," she said quizzically.

"I'm going to prop up my foot for awhile. And take a snooze too," he offered as he opened the door to their room.

Catherine grinned and headed for the bar. Opening the fridge, she pulled out a bottle of water. Then she headed for the bedroom. "Do you need the bathroom before I soak?" she called out.

"No, go ahead…"

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Okay, I took some poetic license here. The Rockette Experience is available on Saturdays but in my story timeline this is Thursday. But hey, it's my story and I can do what I want, right?

Did you like Jim's surprise? He has more but you know the drill, use the little button and all will be revealed…eventually.


	7. Theater and After

Jim was waiting, his tie adjusted and his jacket straightened several times. His foot had been throbbing when they got back to the hotel but was feeling better after resting. Catherine had enjoyed a long soak in the tub after her workout that afternoon. Both had settled in for a nap; then he had ordered room service for a quick bite of dinner since they had both napped longer than they intended. Catherine disappeared into the bedroom to change for the evening some time ago and Jim glanced at his watch, hoping that she would come out soon. Finally the door opened and what he saw took Jim's breath away. When she stepped into the main room, he forgot about his foot and whether or not his tie was straight; he felt like his eyes were bulging and swallowing became impossible. Clearing his throat, he found his voice, although it was somewhat weakened by the lack of air. "You look…gorgeous," he said.

She smiled at him. "I know," she said playfully. Then walking to him, her hand went to his lapel and glided down, smoothing his jacket as she went. "You're looking pretty dapper yourself. For a cop, you sure have good taste in clothes."

"Hey, the suit makes the man, right?" he quipped, still trying to breathe.

"In this case, I think the man makes the suit," she smiled.

Jim felt his ears tinge with red and heat was building where her hand rested. He blinked fighting the urge to take her in his arms and kiss her and show her the effect she was having on him. But once again, his reasonable side won out and he stepped away, looking at his watch. "We'd uh…better get going…"

The taxi dropped them in front of the theater and they headed inside. Once again Catherine was mesmerized by the action on the stage. Jim enjoyed watching her but his mind was reeling. This was turning into more than he had bargained for. His mind and his body was a mass of conflicting feelings and emotions, throwing his stomach into turmoil. Just sitting next to her in the darkened theater was deliriously exciting, frightening, tantalizing, and daunting. And then it hit him like a ton of bricks falling from above; he was falling in love with Catherine Willows. _No, _one of his inner voices whispered_, you've been in love with her for awhile; you are just now seeing it. _The sudden understanding weighed heavily on him. He valued having her in his life. If he made a wrong move here, he could lose her…lose all hope of any kind of relationship with her. He had to be careful. _You can't go crazy here, _he told himself_. Just go slow…think things through…_He nodded to himself, confident in his plan until another voice cried out in his mind; _but I don't want to!_

He tried to watch the play, after all _Chicago_ was one of his favorites; but his mind kept taunting him and he was certain that he missed large portions of every scene as he glanced sideways at his companion. _Wonder what she thinks about me? Oh don't be ridiculous…you are a friend and nothing more. Hell, she could have her pick of any guy around…why would she look twice at you? But she liked the way I looked, she said so just before we left… Oh geez, you loser…she was just being polite; after all, you had just thrown a big compliment her way. She was just throwing you a bone._ On and on his inner voices argued as he became more confused and his heart sank further and further. And then in the last act, she did something that really threw him. Her hand crept across and found his. Then gently, her fingers entwined themselves with his and she squeezed. He froze as he looked down at her hand over his, her touch sending a searing heat through his veins. He felt the heat rise in his neck and settle in his ears as he wondered what the meaning was behind her gesture. Finally the play ended and they made their way outside. Once again hailing a cab, Jim leaned in to give the driver instructions. As they pulled up to Rockefeller Center, Catherine looked at Jim confused. "Oh no you don't; no more workshops for me," she laughed.

He smiled as he paid the driver and then taking her hand, led her towards the plaza and once they entered the building, he guided her to the elevators. "Where are you taking me?" she asked once they were in a car.

"You'll see," he smirked.

She waited impatiently until the car came to a halt and the doors opened. Catherine gasped as she realized where they were. "Jim...the Rainbow Room!" she exclaimed excitedly.

"Yeah, thought you might enjoy the view. I couldn't fit dinner here into the itinerary so I thought …you know, after theater drinks…."

"This is wonderful," she said as they entered. Catherine looked around in awe at all the elegantly dressed people. Many wore tuxes and evening gowns. "I feel so under dressed," she commented.

"You look great," he assured her. "Lots of the ladies are in cocktail dresses. And despite whatever designer wear some of them may have on, you are the most beautiful woman in the room," he added.

Catherine was used to men telling her she was beautiful, or sexy, or whatever. But the little compliments that Jim had been tossing out thrilled her more than any man's compliments had in a very long time. _And now he's saying you are the most beautiful woman in the room…_She cast a sideways glance at him and realized he was watching her closely…_no, not watching… admiring. _A warm glow began within her and radiated outward, casting an equally warm smile on her face.

They were shown to a table and seated. Their drink orders were taken and Jim ordered some appetizers for snacks, as well. He delighted in watching her eyes glitter as she watched all the 'beautiful people' dancing around the floor. He glanced at them occasionally also and wondered if he could hold his own dancing with her. Part of him was shy about asking, after seeing her that afternoon. He knew she could dance circles around him. Besides he wasn't sure how he would manage self control, holding her so close like that. Their drinks arrived and after two long gulps, he found the courage to ask.

She smiled and nodded and the next thing he knew, he had her in his arms, their bodies moving in unison. _God she feels good, doesn't she?_ He closed his eyes and let out a long sigh as they moved around the floor. _Indeed she does, _his other little voice agreed_. _He was enjoying just being able to hold her. _I wish this dance would never end. I could hold her like this through eternity and be a happy man…_

But the music stopped momentarily as the band prepared for another number. Catherine looked into his eyes and realized the effect all of this was having on him. _Is it just because we've had an intoxicating couple of days or is something else going on with him? _She wondered_._

The band began to play again and gently they began to move with the music. It was a slow, romantic piece and Jim melted when she moved even closer into him, her free hand working its way to his collar, her fingers gingerly rubbing his neck and travelling upwards into his hair. She sighed and then rested her head on his shoulder as he guided her around the floor. Tenderly he pulled their clasped hands to his chest and used his other arm to pull her tighter to him. He could feel his heart beating rapidly and although there was a fire burning deep within, he also realized that he had never felt so contented in his life. He would deal with the fire later; for this moment, all he wanted to do was to hold her and continue dancing on the clouds.

They spent some time enjoying the view and then Catherine insisted that Jim sit for a few minutes and take some of the pressure off his foot. She had noticed him beginning to limp a little during their last dance. Besides, she needed a few minutes to process what was happening between them. Her mind kept wandering back to the conversation with Gil about Jim's expectations on this trip. _I know he's feeling it... is turned on, but he hasn't done anything to indicate he expects anything to happen. He's been a perfect gentleman. Should I initiate something? But what if I'm reading him all wrong? What if this is the result of two very intoxicating days and he really does just want to be friends? He said on the plane that he didn't like one night stands; he wants things to mean something…could he really be feeling something more for me? If he does, well…how do I feel?_ Catherine was finding herself in a state of confusion that equaled Jim's.

They danced a few more numbers that were as equally exciting and bewildering as the first dances had been. The band finished its last set and the room began to clear. Jim settled the bill and then putting his arm around her waist, guided her through the crowd and onto an elevator. Catherine felt like a teenager, suddenly delighted and at the same time shy about his possessive hold on her. It wasn't that she was a novice where men were concerned; just with this one. It seemed like all the men she had dated in recent years had made it clear from the beginning what they wanted and expected; sex. But with Jim it was a totally different ballgame. She wasn't sure he wanted anything really. _What happens when we get back to the room? What should I do then? Damn, I'm too old for this, _she reflected. But smiling inwardly, she realized just how young all of this was making her feel.

Once they were back on the street, Jim hailed another cab and ushered her in. He noticed that she had gotten very quiet and he was really beginning to get nervous. _Damn, she must have figured it out and now she just wants on the next flight back to Vegas. Dammit Brass, you've screwed things up again…_ It was a miserable Jim Brass that emerged from the cab in front of the hotel and quietly walked with Catherine across the lobby and into an elevator.

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Okay, so we like, dislike, could care less..._what?_ I do appreciate those who continue to let me know they are reading and are still with me. It's like having made a bunch of new friends almost. Jim Brass invited us all over for a party...


	8. The Morning After

So, we don't like cliffhangers, eh? Okay, I'll solve one of the mysteries for you then...

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Back in the room, Catherine lingered for a few minutes trying to understand what was going on with Jim. He pulled his tie loose and headed for the bar, pouring himself a scotch. "Want anything?" he asked.

"No thanks, I think I've had my quota," she replied. _Besides, one of us needs to keep a clear head…_

She sat on the sofa and was a little disappointed when he sat at the other end…as far at the other end as he could get. But she was somewhat relieved too. He glanced at her sheepishly and then felt in his jacket pocket. Then he glanced away, seemingly having a conversation with himself of some kind. Finally he grunted and looked back at her shyly. "Um…I forgot to …I mean, I was going to give this to you at The Rainbow Room, but we started dancing and …I forgot," he said, looking forlorn.

She looked down at the little package he was holding out to her. It was wrapped in Tiffany blue paper and her heart began to race. It was too big to be a ring…_that's good, we're no where near ready to think about that…_ She took it from him and looked into his face. She smiled, _he just looked too cute,_ she thought. He looked a little like a teenager himself, giving a girl a present for the first time. The mixture of excited anticipation and fear and trepidation in his eyes gripped her heart. Her hand shook as she opened the gift. Inside the box was a sterling silver keychain with a star on it. "Jim, it's beautiful!" She looked up in time to see his eyes change from fearful to happy. He was genuinely pleased that she liked his gift.

"You really like it?" he asked excitedly, a huge grin on his face and his eyes twinkling. "Because, well…you were being such a good sport about the workshop thing and you really were fantastic up there…you know, the _star_ of the show? And…well, we'd passed all those nice shops and you didn't drag me in and make me …you know, do the shopping thing. I just…" he took a deep breath, "wanted you to have something to remember the day by."

She looked at the warm, almost childlike sincerity in his expression and her heart melted. "Jim, this is one of the sweetest things anybody has ever done for me. In fact, the whole day was like that. I can't believe you went to so much trouble. This is way beyond anything I had imagined when we set up this trip."

_Sweetest…she thinks you're sweet. Well, if that isn't the kiss of death…brotherly love and all that crap. _He sighed_. Well, at least she isn't asking about the next flight back…_He smiled at her and said rather distractedly, "Told you, nothing but the best for you; you deserve it." Jim was feeling a shyness that he was unaccustomed to.

She sensed his mood change and decided it might be a good idea to retreat. She was too confused about her feelings and didn't want to make a mess of things. Standing up, she moved closer to him and leaned down. She pecked him on the cheek and smiled. "Thank you for a very memorable day, one of the best I've ever had; and for a this beautiful keepsake to remember it by. You really are something special, Jim." Then she headed for the bedroom.

"Oh, hey…" he called out. "Mind if I use the bathroom before you tuck in for the night?"

She chuckled and nodded. "Help yourself."

He grabbed his toothbrush and headed in. He emerged a few minutes later and spied her sitting on the bed, holding the keychain up and admiring it. Then she gathered it in her hand and held it to her heart. "You really like it?" he asked.

He thought he saw tears in her eyes when she looked at him briefly. "It's one of the nicest things anyone has ever given me, especially in the context of the day. Yes, I really like it," she smiled at him.

"Good," he grinned and then he headed to the other room, softly closing the door behind him.

_She liked it, she really liked it,_ one of his inner voices told him gleefully. _Yeah, but who wouldn't,_ chimed in the other. _Can't read too much into it. Besides, do you really want to go there with her? I mean, really Brass…you are a total screw up at relationships. Or have you forgotten that in all the excitement? That's a good point_, his other voice added.

So Jim sat, finishing his scotch and wondering how the hell he had gotten himself into this predicament. Finally the drinks and the length of the day forced his thoughts about Catherine aside and he settled in on the sofa to sleep.

The morning light woke Jim and as much as he wanted more sleep, he realized that it was time to get moving. As he moved around, folding his blanket and putting the bedding away, he got grumpier and grumpier. Too many drinks the night before and too much confusion were the source of his bad mood. Consequently, when Catherine opened the door to the bedroom and called out a cheerful "Good morning," she was greeted by a grunt as he mumbled "yeah."

She watched as his face twitched slightly and then frowned before settling back into his usual non committal, bland expression. She had seen it thousands of times through the years, especially in interrogations when he didn't want to give anything away to a suspect. _What is going on with him? He's hiding something and it isn't good._

She tried to be calm but his attitude was making her nervous. _He seemed okay at the end last night. What has happened since then? Honestly though, do you really want to know? What if…really girl, you're being ridiculous; you have been friends for too long, there's no way he feels anything else about you or you about him….right?_ Catherine contemplated the question as she watched him finish his task and reach over to the table. He picked up his watch and began strapping it on. As he fastened it, she suddenly felt sad. _It's the little things about having a man around that I miss the most, just inconsequential things like watching him put on a watch…or shaving, or even just reading a newspaper. A sudden impulse surged through her and she simply wanted to be held in a man's arms. _"Jim?" she whispered breathlessly.

He turned and cocked his head, looking at her, his expression wide open like a child that's eager to please. When she didn't say anything else, his eyes narrowed and she saw him closing down again. "Catherine?" he asked quietly.

"It's nothing really; it's just that watching you fasten your watch…" His eyebrows twitched as he glanced down at his wrist and then back at her, a questioning gaze directed towards her. "I um," she tried to continue, "it's just that…" His expression was more focused now, more intent as he tried to decipher her. "Well, I just thought…oh hell, I need a hug," she finally declared.

She was relieved when a smile cracked on his face and a soft chuckle rumbled out of his chest. He stepped to her, opening his arms and pulling her in. "What's the hug about?" he asked as he held her. "Something bothering you?"

She pulled back a little to see his face. "You are," she stated with a smile.

Surprise registered in his features and then she saw a cloud move over his countenance as his eyes darkened. "Me?" His voice was quiet, almost cracking.

"Yes, you. You're so…"

"I know, an asshole," he said dolefully.

"What?" It was her turn to be surprised. "I was going to say 'charming,"

His brows furrowed again and then shot up briefly. A hand went to the back of his head where he began to rub the short hair at his neck. His other arm released her and he stepped away, turning his back to her. She heard and saw a heavy sigh. "Jim?"

She recognized his stance; had seen it so many times when something had hit him hard and he was taking a moment to process it. _What's so difficult about being told you are charming?_ She wondered.

Finally he sighed and turned to face her. "Catherine I…"

The sadness in his expression overwhelmed her. "My god Jim, what is wrong?"

"I… well, I was a bit… snippy last night and I'm sorry."

"What?" She tried to remember but all she could think of was the perfect evening he had planned for her. "Snippy?"

"Yeah, in the taxi and when we got back here…"

"Oh, I thought you were just tired and maybe your toe was hurting. I didn't…it didn't even register with me until you just mentioned it."

"It's just that with all this togetherness and staying in the same suite and all…it feels like we're in a relationship and its damned confusing."

Catherine smiled. Finally he had said something she could sink her teeth into. "Oh, well…yeah, it does sort of, doesn't it? But we're friends, no matter what else happens this weekend…right? Because I mean, at the reunion I'm your date so it might seem to others that we really are in a relationship, but you and I know what's really going on right?"

Shrugging he smiled. "Of course, friends. I just want to be sure we don't confuse the issue, you know?"

She smile and nodded, her heart sinking. _Why does that bother you? You've said from the outset you wanted to keep things clear between the two of you. So why are you disappointed that he's stating the obvious again, you are just friends?_

Unknown to Catherine, Jim was having similar thoughts. _Yeah, just friends…you'd screw up anything more. But what if…no, keep that door closed._

They ate breakfast, packed their bags and headed downstairs. Jim had arranged for a rental to be delivered and it was waiting in the garage. He tossed their bags in the back and climbed in, where Catherine was already seated. "Thought we'd do a quick driving tour before heading over to Jersey," he commented.

She smiled and nodded, still disappointed from the morning conversation. He drove her past some of the famous landmarks but she wasn't really paying attention. She had known Jim Brass, the cop, for years. And occasionally she had gotten a glimpse of his private side. But she'd never imagined that her longtime friend had this side to him, all kindness and thoughtfulness…and romantic charm; _yes, Catherine…you heard me, romantic…how could you have missed that side of him? _She closed her eyes and sighed as the painful truth hit her_; because you never tried to see it, you never looked. _An overwhelming desire to know that side of him hit her full force and as she eyed him through a sideways glance, she made a pact with herself. _You're going to get to the bottom of this before the weekend is over, _she declared inwardly.

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Satisfied? If you are, I'm not doing avery good job. Let me look; oh yes, the littel button is still there. (That's a hint just in case you don't recognize it.)


	9. Moving

Catherine was surprised at how quickly they made it Newark once they left New York. "I didn't realize that it is just across the river," she commented.

"Yeah," Jim grinned. "At night you can see the Manhattan skyline from various parts of the city."

"Wow. So you visited the city often when you were growing up?"

"Some. My Mom would take us over to go shopping and for special events. But it wasn't until I got older that I really learned my way around New York. Mostly I stayed in the old neighborhood here when I was growing up."

"Your parent's still there…or any of your family?"

"Mom and Dad passed away some years ago. My brother moved to New York about fifteen years ago. And my sister, well…last I heard she was still in Newark but it's been awhile."

"You don't talk?"

"Not really," he sighed. "Long story…basically she believed everything Nancy told her about me; they were friends growing up and I guess she wanted to keep her friend. She never would hear my side of things…"

Suddenly Catherine was sorry she had asked. She could hear the hurt that still surrounded his failed marriage. "I'm sorry, Jim. I didn't mean to bring up bad memories."

He shrugged as he made a turn at a light. "It's okay. I have a feeling I'm going to be facing a lot of old memories this weekend. But maybe it's a good thing, you know? Maybe I'll finally be able to let go of some of it. But that's not really why I wanted to come."

"So what was the real reason?"

"Remember I mentioned my buddy, Corky Simms? Well, he's got cancer, you see…and this might be the last time I get a chance to see him."

Instinctively Catherine reached out and touched his arm. "Oh Jim…I wish I had known…"

"Why? Would it change anything?" His expression was unreadable and his voice even. Catherine wasn't sure what he meant by the question. "Uh, I don't see how it could," she said honestly. "It's just…well, it's going to be bittersweet."

He glanced at her and nodded. "Yeah, probably. Only…"

"What Jim?"

"I don't want to think about that part of it too much and I doubt Corky does either. Just too ole pals getting together; that's what it'll be."

"Of course," she smiled. _Men, _she thought_._

They pulled up at the Robert Trent Hotel. "They decided to have the Reunion here. It's where we had our Senior Prom," he commented.

"Cool," she said as she surveyed the historic building. "It looks really nice."

"I got us adjoining rooms. That way we can have our privacy but still be in earshot."

"Sounds good."

After checking in, they made it to their rooms and Catherine found herself standing in the middle of hers, surveying her surroundings. _Not the Waldorf, but nice…_ She heard a soft knock at the adjoining door and stepped over to open it. Jim smiled from his side. "Everything okay?"

"It's nice," she said. "Bet it looks like yours?"

He peeked around the corner and nodded. "Yep."

She stepped back, leaving the door open for him to follow, which he did. "Hey, you hungry or anything?"

"No, not yet. Just thought I'd hang out my clothes real quick," she told him.

"Okay, well…the sign-in is downstairs beginning at four and there's cocktails followed by dinner on the roof."

"I'll be ready."

"Okay," he said, working his fingers nervously. "I'll see you in a little bit then."

"Yeah…and hey Jim, just leave the door open if you want to."

"Ah…okay," he replied as he disappeared through it.

She dazzled him again when she appeared in the doorway, ready for the evening's activities. He stood dumbstruck as he took in her appearance, his throat suddenly dry. The pounding of his heart in his chest resounded in his ears as he felt blood rushing throughout his body.

Jim's reaction to her wasn't lost on Catherine. As she had finished dressing, making the last minute adjustments and adding the final touches, she knew that she looked damned fine. But the sudden color in his face and the twinkle in his eye told her just how good she looked. Catherine had always enjoyed being admired by men, liked the power she felt when she caught their eye but with Jim standing there awestruck, she felt something different. It wasn't about power with him; his look of appreciation reached deep within her, touching her at her core. She felt the color rise into her own face as she realized that she wanted more from him than a fun night filled with flirtation; she just wasn't sure what she was after. One thing was certain; if she followed through on her thoughts, Jim could be hurt. Catherine didn't think she could stand being the reason for anymore pain in his life.

One thing that had always endeared him to her was the fact that everything you needed to know about Jim Brass showed in his face. As she looked into his eyes in that moment, she knew that he had feelings for her that went beyond friendship. _So what are you going to do with that? _She asked herself.

Finally he found his voice and with a wave of his hand towards the door asked if she was ready. She smiled and nodded, following his lead. The ride down in the elevator was quiet. Jim glanced sideways at her several times, his heart still in his throat. _Geez, how am I going to be able to behave myself with her looking like that? At some point, I'm gonna make a fool of myself, I just know it. _He closed his eyes and took in a deep breath. _But she looks so damned good! Of course she does, you dolt,_ his inner voice teased. _What did you expect? It is Catherine. You're going to have to hold hands with yourself all night long to stay out of trouble, you know._ And so, as the elevator doors opened Jim was standing inside, his fingers interlaced and his hands in front of him, wondering if he should have any drinks at all that night because the last thing he needed was for alcohol to do his talking.

They stepped out of the elevator car into a crowd. Jim's hand went to Catherine's back protectively as he guided her through the crowd. He located the sign-in table and stepped into line. Catherine leaned in and whispered, "recognize any body?"

"Yeah, I see several of my classmate's parents," he chuckled.

Just as they stepped up to the table they heard someone calling from behind them. "Jimmy, hey Jimmy…"

Jim turned, looking for the source of the call. His face lit up. "Corky!" Catherine saw his face and remembering that Corky was his main reason for wanting to come, turned to meet his childhood buddy.

A refined looking man approached smiling and waving. Catherine liked what she saw at first glance. He was a couple of inches taller than Jim and had a full head of gray hair that framed a handsome face with sparkling blue eyes. His features were strong, almost chiseled with a strong jaw finishing the effect. As he walked towards them, it was apparent that he was accustomed to commanding a room and others moved out of his way without thinking. "Jimmy, I'm so glad you could make it," he said as the two men shook hands.

"Me too, Corky….me too," smiled Jim.

Corky looked at Catherine and smiled. "I'm Charles Simms…or as Jimmy here calls me, Corky." His manner was gracious and welcoming and Catherine couldn't help but be charmed by the man. "Oh, I'm sorry," said Jim quickly. "Corky, this is Catherine Willows. She made the trip with me from Vegas. Thought I'd show her the sights."

Catherine smiled. "It's nice to meet you, Corky. Jim's been sharing some stories about the two of you."

A soft chuckle rumbled out of the man as he smiled at her. Then winking, he turned to Jim. "Your taste in women has improved, I see, Jimmy."

Jim smirked. "It could only go up, Corky. But Catherine's…"

Before he could say more, Catherine slid her arm through Jim's possessively and jumped in. "I'm looking forward to hearing more stories about Jim when he was growing up. We've shared so much, but he hasn't said much about his younger days. I've teased him about being a menace to society, Corky and I'm excited to finally be able to talk to someone who can fill me in."

Both men chuckled but Jim was wondering what she was doing. _It's like she wants him to think we're an item, like she's my girlfriend or something. Why?_

"Well look, Jimmy. a bunch of us are over at the bar. Why don't you get all signed in and join us?"

"Okay, sure…" answered Jim. Corky disappeared back into the crowd.

Jim turned to Catherine. "Hey, I appreciate you acting like that…I mean, like you're my girlfriend and all, but you really don't have to. It's enough just having you here with me, you know. I don't want you to think…"

Catherine reached up and put a finger over his lips. "I promise, I won't do anything I'm not comfortable with. And in the meantime, if your old buddies think I'm your girlfriend, well…let 'em drool." As she stood looking at Jim, she could see Corky at the bar with some other men, all staring at Jim and talking among themselves. Evidently Corky had delivered the news that Jimmy Brass brought a girlfriend.

Jim knew he was wearing a silly grin but he didn't care. "You're something else, you know that don't you Catherine?"

Pinching his cheek, she winked. "Just don't forget it, Jimmy." Glancing over his shoulder, she saw the admiring looks of the men as her familiarity with Jim registered in their minds.

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Ooooo, thank you so much for the wonderful reviews. Hopefully thigs will start picking up now for our nervous couple...well couple in waiting, maybe?


	10. Introductions

Once they were signed in, Jim led Catherine over to the bar to meet the others. Corky made the reintroductions. Jim, you remember Mike Ferris, Bill Wiggins, Dan McMillian, and Jerry Kingery…"

Jim smiled as each name was called, recognizing his high school friends. "Hey guys, this is Catherine. She…well, she was curious about my checkered past so I brought her along for the trip down memory lane." He smiled as he watched each man react to Catherine, their eyes giving away their admiration.

Catherine was amused by the group of men as they all shuffled places to make room for her at the bar. "Thanks fellas," she smiled her best coquettish smile. Jim was shaking his head as he watched her captivate the whole group. Catherine listened as the men began talking, catching up on the years that had passed since they'd seen one another. There were plenty of laughs and back slaps being exchanged until another man joined the group. Catherine's instincts told her that he was trouble and her radar went up even more when Jim subtly inched closer to her, putting himself between her and the newcomer.

"Hey guys," he said.

Corky nodded. "Jack Whitlock. I'm surprised to see you here." The other men nodded an acknowledgement of his presence but none seemed friendly.

"Aw, don't be that way guys. High School was a long time ago. I'm sure we've all grown up a little since then."

"Yeah," growled Jim. "But most of us didn't do it in the state pen."

"Come on now, Jimmy…that is you isn't it, Jimmy Brass? I did my time and I've been a good boy since I got out. Besides, if it wasn't for Judge Simms, you'd have been there with me." His smile was sinister.

"Yeah, but what about Susan Myers? What did her life turn out to be? She's still in a prison of your making."

"Look, I tried to make it up to her, you know. I still try. I send a check every month to help with her expenses and make sure that stuff gets taken care of around the house. I can't change what happened, but I've tried to make amends…"

Catherine could feel the tension in Jim as he continued to stand between Jack and her. "Come on fellas, let me buy you a round…" Jack offered.

The group broke up and moved away, Jim putting his arm around Catherine as they walked past Jack Whitlock. Corky caught up with them a few minutes later at a table. "I can't believe he came," Corky commented.

"Yeah, well…he'd just better stay the hell away from me," stated Jim.

Catherine looked at Jim concerned. "What's his story, Jim? Why all the concern?"

Jim brushed his hand across his mouth and sighed, sadness radiating from his eyes. "He um…raped a classmate of ours the night before Prom. It was brutal and once she was released from the hospital, she was taken to a mental institution where she spent several years. She hasn't been right since it happened."

"Oh," said Catherine sadly.

Corky looked from Jim to Catherine and back to Jim. His expression told Catherine that there was more to the story. She glanced at Jim and then back at Corky, her eyes questioning.

"What Jim's not telling you is that he and Susie were dating…seriously dating. When Susie was found, she was incoherent and the assumption was that he had done it. He spent Prom night in jail until I heard what had happened. I was his alibi, you see. We'd been out partying the night before and he was with me the whole time. It took the police awhile to piece it all together and then Susie finally came out of it enough to identify Jack. Jim got to him before the cops did. The judge was a friend of my father's and once Dad explained the circumstances, the judge looked on Jim with leniency. He was given the choice of jail or The Marines; he chose the Marines."

Catherine turned to Jim. "You…got to him first?"

Jim's lip had curled slightly on his left side, a look she recognized. He was seething. "I um…well, I…"

"Jim beat the shit out of him," Corky shared. "He deserved it."

Jim was looking down at the table, using his finger to trace circles in the water left by his beer glass. Catherine was staring at him, tears forming in her eyes. Corky saw that they needed a few minutes for Jim to explain so he excused himself and headed to rejoin the group at that reformed at another table. "Jim?"

"I'm sorry Catherine; I didn't want you to hear that story…"

"You were serious about her?"

He flinched, his head twitching. "Yeah." He still wouldn't look at her.

"You were in love with her, then?"

"As much as an eighteen year old guy can be, I suppose. She was… well, she knew me, you know? I had this wild streak in high school and did some crazy stuff but she saw through all of that; saw who I wanted to be…So when I heard what had happened, I went all to pieces. We were supposed to go to the Prom together but instead she spent the night in the hospital and I spent it in jail. When they let me out, I went straight to her; it was pretty bad. He um…I can't tell you what he did to her, but…" He sighed and rubbed the back of his head. "He fixed it so she wouldn't ever be able to have kids. And her face…it was all messed up. I still have nightmares about that night. So when I heard her say it was him, I went after him and when I got to him all I could think was to mess him up like he'd done her. But I didn't have a knife, so he wasn't left scarred like she was."

Catherine gently rubbed his shoulder and then took his cheek in her hand, turning his face towards hers. Jim didn't want to meet her eyes. Something deep within him was ashamed of what he had done, although as Corky had said, the guy deserved it. Even more, Catherine had found out one more sorry detail of his messed up life. But he felt her eyes boring into him and like metal drawn to a magnet, his eyes lifted to hers. He expected to see pity in her eyes and an element of judgment, but it wasn't there. Instead he found honest sympathy and even more, acceptance. Her eyes held his for a long time, the two of them locked in silent communication and a new understanding. He felt her fingers travel to the hair behind his ear and she gently began to caress him there. "Catherine…I um…" he whispered, "I…" he wanted desperately to hold her, be held by her but he didn't know how to give voice to his feelings. "Me too Jim," she whispered back. "Me too."

He looked around, wondering how obvious it would be if they left and then his eye caught a new couple entering the room. Catherine sensed immediately that something was terribly wrong as Jim froze. She looked in the general direction of his stare but couldn't see anything out of the ordinary. At first she wondered if Jack Whitlock was approaching but she didn't see him anywhere. Then she spotted the couple that had caught his attention. "Jim, who are they? She asked turning to see him clenching his jaw.

"Damn," was all he said.

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Now what? Hmmm, reviews make the postings go faster, lol.


	11. Cats

Catherine watched Jim as his eyes followed the couple to a table near the one where Corky sat. "Just when I thought it couldn't get any worse," Jim groaned.

"Who are they?" Catherine asked again.

"The guy is Kenny Dawkins and the woman with him is Nancy, my ex."

"Your ex wife? What's she doing at a reunion for your class?"

"I guess she and Kenny are together now. She was a couple of years behind me in school but dated guys from my class. I never dated her in high school, since she was my sister's friend and all. It wasn't until I got back from Vietnam that we connected." He sighed.  
"Damn, I really don't need this…"

Catherine looked around the room. "We could sneak out the other way…"

Just then, Nancy spotted Jim and Catherine and tugging on Kenny's sleeve, pulled him over with her to the table. "Jim," she said with a false smile. It was so contrived, in fact, that Catherine wanted to smack it off her face.

Trying to be a gentleman, Jim stood and forced a friendly smile. "Nancy…Kenny," he acknowledged them both.

"I'm surprised to see you here, Jim. I didn't think you ever wanted to come back," Nancy said.

"Yeah, well…I wanted to see Corky and some of the other guys…"

Nancy was eyeing Catherine by now, giving her a very blatant look of appraisal. "So who's your friend, Jimmy?"

Jim rolled his eyes and then glanced at Catherine. "Catherine Willows, this is Nancy Brass…at least, I think it's still Brass. Is it, Nancy?" He asked as he glared back at her.

"Yeah, it's still Brass, for now anyway. So you brought a Vegas bimbo to the party. Just your style Jimmy."

Catherine glared at her as Jim bristled at her comment. "Look Nancy, you wanna say something about me then say it. But Catherine didn't deserve that. You owe her an apology."

"You're kidding, right?"

Kenny grabbed her arm. "Come on Nancy, leave them alone. I'm sure Jim just wants to revisit old times like the rest of us."

She shook her arm loose from Kenny's grasp. Glaring at Jim, she continued. "Oh Kenny, you know she's a paid escort…at least, I think that's what they call them these days. Back when Jimmy worked vice, he just called 'em hookers, though. But no decent woman would want Jimmy…"

Catherine was appalled at the woman's behavior and worried about Jim. She recognized the look on his face; he was on the verge of losing control. Standing up next to him, Catherine looked across at Nancy. "Well Nancy, that's where you are mistaken because back in Vegas Jim is considered quite a catch. He doesn't have to pay anybody for anything; he always has several ladies to choose from. I'm just glad he chose me," she smiled coyly.

Jim looked at her and blinked. She turned her smile on him and her expression turned to one of pure wantonness. Jim's eyebrows travelled upwards and a small grin twitched at the corners of his mouth. Catherine was relieved to see a twinkle in his eyes.

"Oh you've got to be kidding," Nancy laughed. "Jim a catch? Women in Vegas must be pretty desperate."

It was Catherine who laughed at her comment. "Yeah, right… Then turning towards Jim, she reached in his jacket pocket where he's put the room keys and she pulled one out. Then she leaned into him, giving him a quick but suggestive kiss. "I'll meet you upstairs," she said meaningfully and then she walked out of the bar, her hips swaying and the eyes of every man there following her. Nancy realized the attention that Catherine was receiving and it made her fume more.

Jim turned back to Nancy. "She's not a bimbo, Nancy. She's a criminalist at the LVPD lab and one of the top people in her field; really smart as well as beautiful and caring, something that you wouldn't understand. And after your little diatribe I'm embarrassed to have brought her here. She's way out of your league and doesn't deserve the treatment you gave her. Now, if you'll excuse me…I don't want to keep the lady waiting." Looking from Nancy to Kenny, he nodded and then he turned and followed Catherine's path out of the room, several sets of envious eyes following him.

He headed for the elevators but before he got there, Catherine came out of a corner and entwined her arms in his, laughing. "Now that was fun," she said.

"Catherine, I'm sorry…" Jim began.

"For what, your ex wife's catty behavior? I had fun clawing back. I think I'll spend the weekend making her green."

"Nancy won't turn green over me," he told her, shrugging his shoulders. "She tossed me out with the garbage years ago."

"Ah, but she's a woman and you _were_ hers. She's not going to like seeing you with another woman, whether she really wants you or not. By the end of the weekend she'll be wondering what she missed all these years."

"Catherine, I really don't want…"

"Aw, come on Jimmy. Can't a girl have some fun?" she cooed.

Jim's mouth fought to contain the grin that threatened. He realized that he was about to be caught in the middle of a cat fight and even though Catherine was on Nancy's turf, Catherine would have the advantage. Although he appreciated that Catherine was going after Nancy because of him, he was dismayed. This was the kind of thing he had hoped to avoid. _Still, _he thought_, this could be fun to watch…_

Just then Corky walked out into the lobby. Spotting the two, he strode over. "There you are. Hey, there's a bar down the block. Let's head down there for a quiet drink before dinner and really catch up, okay Jimmy?"

Jim glanced at Catherine who smiled and nodded. "I'll just hang out in the room…"

"No way," Corky said before Jim could respond. "I want the scoop on Vegas and what Jimmy's up to these days and I know he won't tell me. Besides, I like you and want us to get to know each other better, just in case you get bored with Jimmy." His tone was friendly and inviting and glancing at Jim, she knew he wanted her to go with them.

"Okay," she said as she wrapped her arm around Jim's. She could feel the tension ebbing from him and was relieved. He deserved to have some fun at this thing and drinks with Corky was perfect.

So a few minutes later they were seated in a booth at the bar, a local hangout and not the kind of place that would draw tourists. Catherine's mind went into investigator mode momentarily as she looked around. It seemed like a blue collar kind of place; no ties and jackets were here except for the jackets worn by Jim and Corky.

Jim got the drinks at the bar and carried them over. He settled in next to Catherine and sighed. "I dunno, Corky. I really wanted to come back and see you and some of the other guys, but I'm beginning to think this was a bad idea."

Corky gazed across the table at him, his face showing understanding and a weary smile. "I'm glad you came, Jim. It took me two months of treatment and recovery to be up for this thing and it'll be my last. I'd rather get to visit with you now then have you come back just to go to my funeral. It means a lot to me that you are here; I know the price…"

Jim twitched, suddenly having a tic in his neck that Catherine had never seen before. "Well, you can thank Catherine, then. I was about to bail and she convinced me to come."

Corky smiled at her. "Thank you. I can see Jim has better friends in Las Vegas than most of us were to him back here."

Catherine frowned and looked at Jim, hoping for an explanation. His expression told her that she wouldn't get one.

"Jim, I'm sorry I didn't stay in better touch after you and Nancy got married. I really don't have a good excuse except that I didn't like her for you and didn't understand it. Why did you marry her?"

Jim shrugged. "I thought I was in love with her; she was familiar. And we were okay for awhile. But she didn't like that I was a cop. And my hours left a lot to be desired. She wanted attention and I wasn't there to give it to her."

"Yeah, but we all knew it wouldn't take. She never stuck with one guy for long; still doesn't."

"Yeah, well then I feel sorry for Kenny. She's got her hooks into him now, apparently."

"She does. And before that she was after Frankie Domiano. And before that it was…well, you get the idea, anyway."

"Yeah, I know…now. I wish somebody would have told me before I married her."

"Jimmy, we tried. But you wouldn't listen."

"Well, I listened plenty as the stories made their way around the squad room. The last straw, as far as I was concerned, was Mike O'Toole. You remember him?"

"Yeah, I had the pleasure of sending him to prison. He's out now, you know?"

"I thought so. I really don't care anymore." There was sadness in his expression that gripped Catherine's heart. She knew that there was more to this O'Toole guy. "But then I had one…one affair and she nailed me with it. That's how she got custody of Ellie. Not that I was in any shape to take her, but…"

Then Corky asked a question that made Catherine wince. "How is Ellie anyway? She's what…23…24?"

"Twenty six. She's in L.A. She and I don't…talk, so I really don't know how she's doing. You'd have to ask Nancy." Catherine's hand went to Jim's on the table and she squeezed it, trying to give comfort. It was a gesture that was not lost on Corky.

"So you like it in Vegas, Jim?" He was changing the subject, giving everyone relief.

"Yeah, it was a fresh start for me. I worked as a detective when I first got there and then moved over to CSI; that's where I met Catherine. Then later I got kicked back to Homicide."

"CSI?"

"Crime Scene Investigation," Catherine told him. "Forensics."

Corky chuckled. "So you were hanging out with the geeks?"

Catherine smiled and Jim grinned. "Yeah. Although not all of them are geeks. Catherine is one of the top blood splatter analysts around and she's hardly a geek." He winked in her direction.

Corky looked at her with a new appreciation. "Really? I had no idea…"

Catherine was amused by the speculative look in his eyes. "Yeah. But we do have our share of geeks. And the cops love to call us the 'geek squad.' Jim got counted among us while he was there and took some heavy ribbing from his peers at PD. Some of them still think he likes us better than him."

Corky looked from her to Jim. "From where I sit, there's plenty to like…"

Jim's mood was lightening up and Catherine saw the twinkle coming back into his eyes. "Oh, we're partial to Jim too. He's our favorite detective…mine at least."

Suddenly Jim's ears began to burn. He shifted in the booth as he realized how much he wanted to believe what she said; but she'd seen the way she and Vartann had flirted and there's been a couple of others too. He knew where he stood; she was just keeping up the appearance of something special between them while they were here.

Corky misread Jim's discomfort and wondered just how close the two were. He hoped it was very close because he wanted Jim to have some happiness. "Well, I'm glad. Jim had a lot of crap thrown at him here and he deserves to have things go his way."

Jim remained quiet as flashes of his years in Vegas played in his mind. He'd had a lot of crap thrown at him there too, but he also had friends that stood by him; something that didn't happen before. When things had fallen apart in Jersey, he had faced it alone. It was Catherine who gave voice to what he felt. "Oh, shit happens in Vegas too and Jim gets his share of it. But our team, his team from when he was at CSI…we're like a little family sort of and Jim's one of us. He's stood up for us and taken the heat for us many times and we try to do the same for him."

There was a somber pause in the conversation until Catherine relieved it. "So Corky, tell me about Jim as a young guy…he has alluded to some high school pranks but he doesn't share easily."

Corky chuckled and looked across at Jim, who was giving him a death glare. "Pranks? He told you there were pranks?"

"I didn'tell her anything, she assumed." Jim smirked.

"Yeah…right. What about Madame Fargos?" She shot back.

Corky choked on his drink at the mention of Madame's. "You told her about that?" he laughed as he looked across at his buddy. Jim shrugged sheepishly.

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More has been revealed! And there is more to come:-)


	12. History Lesson

Catherine watched the two men and was glad that she had coerced Jim into coming. Seeing his childhood buddy one last time was good for Jim. Corky's mind was at work, she saw; and then looking at her he began talking.

"Did he tell you about blowing up the toilet in the school bathroom when we in the seventh grade?"

Catherine's eyes got huge. "No…you two did that?"

"Yeah, we stuffed it with fireworks and then set them off. We almost got caught in the explosion, but it was worth it just to see the look on Mrs. Glass' face."

Jim's shoulders shook as he chuckled. "Hey, you remember the night we set of the strings of firecrackers at old Mr. Dobson's?"

"Yeah," answered Corky. "I didn't think he could move that fast but he flew out of that recliner," he laughed. Then turning to Catherine he added, "it was a summer night and all of his windows were open. He always fell asleep in his recliner by the double windows on the front of his house. We strung firecrackers on all the window sills and lit them. You'd have thought it was a war zone."

Catherine was enjoying their memories and glad to see Jim in a better mood. He had enough darkness in his life; he didn't need it this weekend. Besides, this was what he had come for.

Jim looked across at Corky, still grinning. "You remember Leslie Lyons?"

Corky started laughing again. "Oh, you gotta tell Catherine that one…"

Catherine looked at Jim expectantly. "Well," he said, "there was this girl…Leslie Lyons. Actually she was kind of cute; petite, short dark hair, and a really bubbly trusting personality; a really sweet girl. Every time we saw her, Corky and me would tell her that one of the guys had the hots for her and was planning to ask her out. Of course, none of the guys called her so finally, she challenged me on it. Wanted to know who was gonna call this time? So I told her that I couldn't name him, but he had red hair. Now, there were three guys in our class that had red hair; the football running back, a guy in the band that looked like Alfred E. Neuman but was a cool funny guy, and Ray Phillips. Now Ray was the acne king in school with a face covered in zits, but that might have been overlooked if he wasn't so clumsy and uncoordinated. On top of that he had a really high pitched, squeaky voice and was totally naive about everything. He was the type that just made your skin crawl. But of course, Leslie thought about the jock and the trumpet player when I said red hair.

"So she waited for one of them to call. Meantime, I had a little chat with Ray. He worked up the nerve to pass her a note in class and ask her to meet him at the library after school. So Corky and I told everybody that Ray had a girlfriend; that we saw them at the library and they met there often. So of course, half the class shows up at the library to see Ray's girlfriend…"

"Jim, that was terrible…" Catherine admonished him. "Poor Ray…and even worse, Leslie. None of the guys would have asked her out after that…"

Corky jumped in. "They didn't for awhile and then we got to feeling bad about it. Jim asked her out first and made sure a bunch of the guys saw them together. Then I took her out a couple of times. We talked some of the other guys into asking her out a time or two and then the thing took on a life of its own. The jock finally did ask her out. Last count, they have four grandkids now."

Jim smiled. "Really? I'll bet she's a fantastic granny, that sweet personality and all."

"Jim, from your expression I'd guess that you were a little sweet on her yourself," Catherine teased.

"A little maybe. She was a sweet girl and while no beauty, she wasn't hard on the eyes. But I made her nervous; guess I was too wild for her or something."

They sat quietly for a moment and then Corky piped up. "The stink bomb in the cafeteria was a masterpiece."

Jim started laughing. "Yeah, I can still remember the yellow smoke…"

"My favorite…Jim's best stunt ever though, was the motorcycle."

Jim grinned. "Yeah, that was great. It was worth all the crap that landed on my head for it."

Catherine looked from one to the other. "So, is anybody going to share?"

Corky jumped in. "Jim conned a salesman at the Harley Davidson dealership into letting him take one out for a test ride. He'd ditched school to go over there. Then he shows up at school on this thing and gets one of the guys to open the door on the south end of the building. By this time, it's like 1:30 in the afternoon. Everybody is back in class after lunch. We're sitting there and hear engine noises in the hallway and head to the doorways to see what's happening. There goes Jim, straight down the hall on this bike. Just as he gets to the principal's office, he pops a wheelie, revs the engine and flies past Mr. Hayden's door. The he brings it back down and runs on down the hall and out the door on the opposite end. Mr. Hayden was furious."

"Yeah, I think I spent the rest of the year in detention. Not to mention, my parents had me on a strict curfew, and the local constabulary and judges were on the look out for me. I couldn't even so much as jaw walk with out a cop being on my case. And if I showed up in court, they were going to slam me. But it was worth it."

"Yeah, Jim was the school hero," chortled Corky.

"Some hero," laughed Catherine. "Jim, I knew there was a mischievous side to you, but really…"

Jim beamed. "What can I say? I had a lot of the wrong kind of energy back then… But I didn't think up all of the pranks; Corky concocted a scheme about chickens."

"Chickens?" Catherine glanced across at Corky who nodded smugly.

"Yeah, we took up a collection from the class and in the last week of school, we had a chicken farmer deliver crates of chickens to us behind the gym. Then, Corky organized us in teams of two and at 9:00 am, all the doors opened and the chickens were released into the school. There were chickens everywhere…" Jim was laughing so hard that tears were forming in his eyes.

"Yeah," Corky said. "It took days to finally get all the chickens. They went everywhere…" he said snickering.

Catherine was laughing too. The image of so many chickens ran in her mind. She could only imagine what the adults in those boys lives thought of all of their pranks.

"Oh hey," Corky said as he looked at his watch. "We'd better head back. It's about time for dinner…"

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Hmmm, Jim was quite the prankster evidently. Let me know what you think, please.


	13. Dinner

Back at the hotel, they saw members of their class moving towards the elevators as they made their way through the lobby, heading up to the roof for dinner. "It's really nice at the Star Light; you can see the Manhattan skyline, as well as Newark," Corky told Catherine.

"Hey Corky, where's Jennifer? asked Jim.

Corky smiled. "She's meeting me on the roof. She had some last minute appointments to take care of. She's trying to keep her practice going while taking care of me. I'm glad because she'll need something after…well, you know." He smiled but there was sadness in his eyes.

"Jennifer?" Catherine asked.

"My better half," replied Corky. "We've been married thirty years now and it seems like they have flown by. We're grandparents and still, when she smiles at me my knees go weak."

Sadness clouded Jim as he listened to his friend talk about his wife. _That was the kind of marriage I had hoped for…_"You're one hell of a lucky guy, Corky; to have a woman like that stick with you for all these years."

"I know," he smiled. "And I am reminded of it everyday, especially since I've been sick. Don't know how I would have made it this far without her. She was the one that encouraged me to come to this thing…made her mission to be sure I was healthy enough to make it."

Sensing that things could get gloomy, Catherine decided to steer the conversation away from sad topics. "Well, I'm glad she convinced you. I'm enjoying getting to know you, Corky. And I love getting the goods on Jim. Back in Vegas, we all suspected he was a rascal as a younger guy and your stories are confirming our suspicions."

Corky chuckled as the elevator doors opened to the roof. Catherine gasped in awe at the view. "Back in Vegas you go to the top of a building and all you see is sand."

"Come on Catherine, you know that's not true," grimaced Jim. There are lots of rooftops that give you a view of the city and Sam's casinos."

"Yeah, well most of them were sold years ago. The Eclipse is the only big project left."

"Who's Sam?" asked Corky.

"My father." Catherine said sadly. "He was killed last year just as he was beginning to build his last casino…and the biggest."

"Oh, I'm sorry."

"Thank you. He was 'old Vegas' but had changed with the times and so survived…at least until that last night," her voice trailed off.

Corky looked at Jim and started to ask what had happened but Jim shook his head, essentially waving him off. Putting his arm around her waist, Jim spoke softly. "Hey kid, Sam would want you to enjoy the party…."

Catherine nodded and smiled at him as they arrived at their table. Jennifer was waiting there and so Corky introduced the two women. Another couple joined them, Jerry Kingery and his wife Anna. Finally all three couples were settled at the table. The women began to talk; Anna and Jennifer apparently knew each other but as they talked, they were sure to include Catherine. She appreciated the effort; it would have been easy for them to leave her the odd woman out.

The men began reminiscing and comparing notes on what had happened to some of the old crowd. Jim listened and added his two cents in occasionally, but found he was more interested in watching Catherine as she interacted with the two wives. _Somehow she manages to look interested as they go on and on about people she doesn't even know…_She smiled at a story that Jennifer was telling but her eyes turned towards Jim and changed their expression as they fell on him. He couldn't define the look exactly; all he knew was that it was warm and…_inviting?_ Her smile changed too, from the 'I'm listening but don't have the faintest idea of what you are talking about' smile she'd been wearing for the two women to a demure kittenish grin that was meant for only him. Their eyes flirted and seemed to be having a conversation totally separate from the one at the table. The evening continued with stories being shared and everyone catching up on everyone else but no one at the table missed the surreptitious glances between Jim and Catherine.

The glances were being watched with another pair of eyes from across the room. Nancy Brass sat with Kenny, watching her ex husband with 'that' woman. She was forced to admit to herself that Jimmy looked good. He was trimmer and in better shape than when he left Newark and he no longer had the bags under his eyes and puffiness from too much drinking. Somehow he seemed more comfortable with himself. All of this only made her angrier.

When she couldn't contain her irritation any longer, she made her way across the room to Jim. "Si Jim, have you talked to Ellie lately?" She was standing behind him when she spoke.

Jim looked up, surprised by her presence as well as her question.

"No, I haven't," he answered. Catherine saw the pain in his expression and knew he wouldn't tolerate much discussion. "Oh, I've met Ellie," she said, trying to deflect the conversation.

"You've met my daughter?" Nancy was getting angrier.

"Yes, a couple of years ago. I was at the hospital when she came to visit Jim. She's a very pretty girl."

The conversation was unnerving to Jim. He didn't like being reminded of Ellie's last visit, nor did he want talk about his being shot to cloud the evening. But he understood what Catherine was trying to do. One the other hand, he was furious with Nancy for intruding on them. He told himself that he was being unreasonable, but at that moment he wanted to be unreasonable.

"Yes, she is. What were you doing in the hospital, Jimmy; getting your ingrown toenails clipped?"

Her comment was only just sinking in for Jim but Catherine was instantly in her face, her fear from that incident rising in her throat. "He was shot. We almost lost him." Gasps were heard as the others around them reacted to the news.

"Look Nancy, I don't know why you came over here, but…" Jim began.

Catherine wasn't finished with the woman yet, however and she jumped in again. "Jim saved a woman's life that day; not the first time he's saved lives but if he hadn't done what he did, that woman would be dead now. You understand that, Nancy? You seem to think so little of him, but where I come from…well, he's a hero."

Nancy snickered. "Hero? Jimmy? Do you really expect me to believe he's some sort of hero? I guess you think Anna and Jerry's son is some sort of hero for getting shot in Iraq too."

"Nancy, stop it," warned Jim.

Catherine turned to look at Anna and Jerry and saw the hurt in their faces. "Of course he is a hero. And, _if _Jim made mistakes back here, I'm sure he had you to thank. After all, you were _so_ supportive of him…" Catherine shot back. "I mean, why would he be distracted by a wife that's screwing around?"

"Catherine…please…" Jim cut in. His hand went to her arm, trying to calm her down.

Nancy saw her opportunity to goad them more. "Me screwing around…so his nailing that she detective didn't count? Let me tell you a thing or two about good old Jimmy here…

Catherine cut her off. "Oh there's nothing you need to tell me." She said, smiling wickedly. "I know all about Jim…everything that's important to know anyway." She paused and looked at Jim, her expression becoming tender. "But I do want to thank you Nancy, because if you hadn't been such a …well, you know…bitch; then Jim wouldn't have come to Vegas and I would have never known him." Her voiced dropped and got throaty as she continued. "And I do so enjoy _knowing_ him," she smiled salaciously. She had a sudden urge to lick her lips as she turned back to Jim, a hungry look in her eyes.

Nancy started to speak, managed to spit out "tramp," and then quickly turned and stomped away.

Catherine turned to apologize to Jim and the others but her bad behavior but was greeted by approving smiles. Jennifer spoke for all of them when she told Catherine that they were glad Jim had her in his corner. "Nancy treated him so horribly and he tried so hard to make it work. I'm glad he's with someone who appreciates him now."

Sitting quietly, Jim was trying to grasp what had just happened. He watched Catherine as she played her role, telling them that she did appreciate him…that he was one of the best men she'd ever known. He saw their approving nods as a gnawing sensation grew in his stomach. This game that he and Catherine were playing was beginning to get to him; he was beginning to hate it. His chair became more and more uncomfortable until finally he leaned over to her and asked if she'd like to see the skyline.

They walked across the roof to a spot where they could stand and look out at the New York skyline. As he pointed out various landmarks, his senses worked overtime, taking in every nuance of her. His skin began to tingle as she eased into him, standing closer and closer until he could feel her body heat. She was almost completely in front of him, her silky red hair teasing his nose with feather like brushes as the breeze fluttered through it. A silent battle waged within him as he tried to decide whether or not he should kiss her. Gingerly he put his arms around her, his hand reaching around to hold her hands in front of her.

Catherine felt him moving closer and savored the feel of his arms wrapping around her. They stood like that for a few minutes, simply relishing the closeness. Just as Jim was working up his courage to kiss her, she turned. Smoldering blue eyes met smoky ones as they gazed at one another. He felt her hand move behind his neck and then suddenly she was kissing him. It wasn't a playful, role playing kiss like she had given him before. This was the real thing.

Jim's entire body was aflame as he felt her lips on his, warm and probing. He was so stunned he just stood there, letting her flame consume him. He felt himself whimper as her tongue pressed for access and he fell into a spiraling chasm of emotions and he surrendered to the waves of passion that were flowing through him.

When he reflected on it later, Jim couldn't remember much about the elevator ride to their floor except the smell of her perfume. By the time they made it to their rooms, his heart was pounding so hard in his chest that he thought it might explode. She was kissing him again and this time he was coherent enough to kiss back. His brain was on sensory overload as her taste, smell, and touch electrified him.

It was then that one of his little voices decided to speak. _Whoa, hold on there…what are you doing? This is Catherine after all. _Stepping back, Jim took a deep breath, silently apologizing to Catherine as her look of confusion registered in his brain. After a momentary panic attack, he found his voice. "Catherine, I…I'm sorry. Things… got out of hand. Really… I…" His brain couldn't form a coherent thought so his mouth lost its momentum.

As her eyes met his, a knowing smile crept across her face. There was a sparkle to her expression as she cooled. Licking her lips seductively, she stepped back also. Then tilting her head coyly, she whispered in a sultry tone. "It's okay Jim, really. You'll figure it out." Then she turned and disappeared through the adjoining door, closing it softly behind her. He heard the click as the lock on her side slid into place. Standing alone in the middle of his room, he could have sworn that the sound was his heart hitting the floor.

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Okay, I know...I left poor Jim a mess; yes, another 'cliffy.' But hopefully moving in the right direction? You know the drill, lol.


	14. Color My World

Jim Brass had a long night. His dreams were filled with Catherine and he woke several times, the feel of her still warm on his skin and the smell of her in his room, or so he thought. _She kissed me, _he kept telling himself. _Why'd she kiss me? And she said I would figure it out… what's to figure? I just lost my head there for a moment. _

Then his other little voice spoke. _You know you want her, just admit it._

_Yeah, but I want her forever, not just for the weekend. She's not going to want me forever. I'm too old, too used up…She's so full of life…vivacious…God, she's so beautiful…_He felt his insides twist as he though of her.

_You know you're in love with her…do something about it._

_Sure, and get shot down faster than a lame duck in hunting season. Besides, then it would just be too difficult…_

_You're a sorry SOB, you know that? You're gonna die alone because you are too scared to gamble on this. Big Jim Brass, big detective, defender of the weak and down trodden…gun toting coward is what you are…_

_Yeah, maybe…_

On and on it went through the night with Jim tossing and turning under the bedcovers. Several times he got up and walked to her door but just as he raised his hand to knock, he turned and went back to bed. _Coward…_

When he woke up the last time, her door was ajar. He slipped on some pants and padded over, peeking around the corner. Water was running in the bathroom and he assumed she was in the shower, so he decided to take one himself. By the time he had showered and shaved, she was dressed and waiting in her room. He peeked around the corner again and she looked up and smiled. He could have sworn that the sun had been delivered to her room; her smile brightened him so much. "Hey," he said quietly.

"Hey yourself. Sleep well?"

"No…"

"Me neither…" Jim couldn't believe how together she looked. He felt like he was a bundle of nerves and she looked so composed. "Ready for breakfast?"

Jim was surprised by the sudden interest in food. "Ah, sure…"

They headed down to the private room that had been reserved for the reunion and found several of their companions from the previous night. After serving themselves at the buffet, they sat down next to Corky and Jerry. Jerry smirked at Jim. "Jimmy, looks like you didn't get much sleep last night."

Jim shrugged. He knew what Jerry and the others were thinking. He didn't want to tell them that he'd choked…or why."

Catherine smiled demurely, playing along with the illusion and leaving little doubt in their minds about why Jim had lost sleep. Jim was torn between hugging her and burying his head in the sand. Everyone was silent for a few minutes until Jerry broke the quiet. "Any of you guys going on the tour of the school this morning?"

Jim looked at Catherine and she nodded in the affirmative. "Yeah, I'd like to see the hallway where the infamous ride took place," she smirked. So an hour later, Jim found himself wandering the halls of his old high school pointing out areas of interest to Catherine. He showed her the trophy his hockey team won and told her about his small role in the victory. Then he showed her some of the classrooms where he'd spent a lot of time. Then they walked the hallway with him retelling the story of the motorcycle ride. "Right here is where I popped thee wheelie," he said as they stood in front of the principal's office.

Memories of high school flooded through him as they walked the halls and then they came upon a picture of his class. There were class pictures hanging all through the halls, so Catherine wasn't surprised when they stopped in front of his. He stood, looking at the picture. After a moment, he pointed to a skinny, young face. "He was killed in Vietnam. So was he," he added as he pointed at another face. Then pointing at two girls, he continued. "They were in the World Trade Center on 9/11. He was one of the firemen that went in," he said pointing at another face. "He died two years later from the damage that was done to his lungs." A small grin played at his mouth. "He's in Congress and he just retired from the Army as a General. She's on the State Supreme Court…" He went on and on talking about the achievements of his classmates. "Corky is the District Judge here, you know? And Jerry is on the City Council. Our class had done a lot…has quite a few leading citizens…"

Catherine watched his face as he talked and saw a cloud settle over his features. _He thinks he hasn't measured up…_ "Including one Captain of Detectives in Sin City, one of the toughest crime challenges in the country. You do a good job, Jim. You always have; you're one of the best."

His expression as he turned to look at her almost broke her heart. It was evident that he didn't believe her. "Am I? Because it seems to me that I'm always screwing up…"

Putting her hand on his cheek, her eyes bored into his. "No Jim, you're not screwing up. You're always trying to do what's right; it's the rest of the world that's screwed up. You are one of the best men I've ever known and I feel honored to count you among my friends. You make me and everyone around you a better person. You're one of the guys in the white hats, Jim. Don't ever forget that."

Jim looked from her back to the picture. His lost expression was heartrending and Catherine choked back tears when she saw it. "I've tried," he said finally. "I really have tried…"

She wrapped her arm in his and pulled him away from the picture. "Come on, let's head back. It's almost time for the picnic."

The group spent the afternoon at a local park, grilling and having a picnic. Catherine spotted Jack Whitlock leering at her several times but said nothing to Jim. She was trying to get him to lighten up and somehow mentioning Jack Whitlock didn't seem like a step in the right direction. She also spotted Nancy a few times watching them. Each time she saw Nancy, Catherine tried to do something that made Jim and her appear to be a couple. She brushed imaginary leaves from his hair or wiped a smudge off his face. When they were eating, she made sure to take a few bites off his plate and made him sample some of hers. Jim had seen Nancy watching them and guessed what Catherine was doing. He played along, following her cues. Nancy's reactions kept him amused.

A dance was scheduled for that night. Once the picnic ended, they headed back to the hotel, where they showered and changed and then went out for dinner. A couple of hours later, they were in the ballroom for the dance. As usual Jim thought Catherine was stunning and told her so several times. He watched as she good naturedly danced with some of his old buddies and then finally approached him. "You owe me a dance, Captain Brass." Her expression left no room for argument.

The band was playing songs from the sixties and seventies and after the third dance with her, Jim suggested they take a break. Her close proximity was tying his stomach in knots. Then the band began another tune and she grabbed his hand. "After this one…this is one of my old favorites," she said. He smiled and gathered her in his arms as the chords to Chicago's _Color My World_ began.

_As time goes on I realize  
Just what you mean to me_

She snuggled into him, her head resting against his shoulder and he dipped his own head to rest against hers. They began to move in unison as their bodies seem to meld. He felt a strange combination of contentment and heat as she moved with him.

_  
And now, now that you're near_

The smell of her perfume was intoxicating, as was the softness of her skin. Her fingers worked their way to his neck and played gently along his hairline, sending thrills through him. He heard her small gasp as his hand made its way down to her lower back, pressing her closer to him.

_  
Promise your love  
That I've waited to share_

She seemed to melt into him. Awareness of the room faded until all he knew was the sound of the music and the feel of her against him. Everything fell away as Jim Brass's world got smaller and smaller until it was only Catherine. And he knew…he figured it out. He was in love with her…really in love, the real thing this time. She was his hope for the life he had always wanted…the little house with the picket fence and the wife that meant everything to him.

_  
And dreams of our moments together  
Color my world with hope of loving you_

"Catherine…" he whispered as the music ended.

She was still melded to him, swaying with music that was no longer playing; her eyes closed and her mind held in that moment. "Hmmm?"

"I think I figured it out…"

Her movement was subtle and relaxed as she kissed him below his ear. "Then let's go to your room and you can explain it to me…"

He tilted his head back a little and looked at her. "You sure?"

Her eyes were heavily and lusty looking. "Yeah…"

He took her hand and led her out of the room. Everyone that saw them knew where they were going and why but neither cared. Nancy looked on with angry eyes but said nothing as her gaze followed them across the room until they disappeared out of the door.

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Ooops, another cliffy. Hopefully I can make it worth the wait...or rather, our couple can.


	15. The Real Deal

Jim did have the big picture figured out…sort of. But as they rode down on the elevator, he wondered what he was going to do about the smaller picture, tonight. He hoped that this wouldn't turn into a one nighter but it had the earmarks of one. _Stupid. _As he looked at her standing next to him, he knew he had to get it right.

Within a few minutes, he found himself standing just inside the door to his room, looking at her in the middle of the room. Her eyes took on an absolutely wicked look as she watched him cross the space between them until he stood in front of her. "What now Jim?"

He studied her face, his eyes noting every nuance of her countenance; then her hair, the red tints standing out in the low light of the room. Then his eyes went back to hers as his hand cradled her cheek. Her face leaned into his hand as her eyes closed with his touch. His thumb began to caress her cheek and then moved over her eye, his fingers resting behind her ear. And then he did it; he kissed her. He was tentative at first, wanting to savor the initial sensation. His lips covered her soft ones, at first full on and then he backed off a little, slowly running his lips over hers, barely touching, yet craving more. His other hand made its way to her face, sliding her hair back and out of the way as he trailed across her cheek to nuzzle her ear and then her neck. He rested for a moment in the crook of her neck as he listened to her breathing; or was it his own breathing that was so heavy?

Then he began kissing again. This time as his lips covered hers, his tongue traced the line of her lips, still teasing and taunting, even as her lips parted. More heavy breathing as her hands travelled up his back and pulled him closer to her. The kiss ended and he shed his jacket and tie. The he led her to the bed. He sat down, his back against the headboard and she settled next to him, turned sideways . The kissing began again with her leaning across him, her hand on his chest.

"Just so you know," he whispered between kisses, "I intend to do a lot of this."

"Mmmm, and you do it so well, too," she said as he began kissing her again.

As the heat built between the two of them, the kisses became more intense. "I feel like I'm in high school again, making out on my mother's couch," she said.

"This isn't high school or your mother's couch." He said as he looked at her. "And we're going to do more than just make out…at least I hope…" He was cut off by her kiss…which led to more passionate kissing. Her hand found its way under his shirt. "No, definitely not high school," she said as her fingers found his little tufts of chest hair.

Things progressed slowly as clothes were shed and they savored the sensations of one another. She was, as he had known she would be, absolutely beautiful all over. She was surprised by the tightness of his muscles, especially in his chest and posterior. There was an awkward moment when she discovered the scar from when he was shot. Memories of that time flooded through her as she fingered it. His hand covered hers and gently he moved it away, making it clear he didn't want to focus on the scar.

Catherine wasn't sure what she had expected from Jim in the love making department; he wasn't the most suave, sophisticated guy. But as the night progressed, she learned that he was very considerate, more concerned with her pleasure than his own. So many men she'd been with set their own pace and expected her to follow. Jim proceeded slowly, attentive to her responses to him. She delighted in his responses to her, making her feel even more feminine and sexually powerful. Catherine had used and been used sexually; with Jim it wasn't about sex. Even with Eddie who she had once loved, it had always been about the sex but with Jim, it really was making love, showing love, and feeling love.

Jim struggled with keeping his emotions under control. As he held her, kissed her and caressed her, the love that had been slowly growing within him came rushing to the surface threatening to overtake him. As she responded to his touch, euphoria enveloped him. She wanted him, to be with him; he knew it because of the way she touched him. But he wanted to get it right; _after all, you only get one chance to make a first impression_, he thought.

They spent hours exploring one another, teasing and taunting, reveling and savoring. And then the passion took them both. Primal instincts drove them higher and higher, their bodies joined in a swirl of heat and frenzy until they exploded from the flames and relief cascaded over them. For Jim, the descent was as sweet as the climb with her body beneath his, still wanting him, needing him. He was exhausted but he held himself over her, lingering in the after glow. Her hands continued to caress him, filling him with a sense of peace. The muscles in his arms began to fail and he collapsed next to her.

Catherine felt his absence. She understood that he needed to move, but she missed the warmth of his body over her. Rolling over, she entwined her body with his, reconnecting. Her hand travelled over him, as if it had a mind of its own. She needed to touch him. He sighed happily and then grunted as he wrapped his arm around her. Her head rested on his shoulder and she listened as his heartbeat slowed to a steady, soothing rhythm. _This is where I want to be, _she thought as she relaxed into him.

A few minutes later a call from Mother Nature sent her to the bathroom. Experience had taught her to expect Jim to be snoring by the time she returned. This time experience was mistaken. He was lying in the bed on his side, watching her as she walked out of the bathroom. He looked happy, but worried as she sat next to him. He sat up and cleared his throat. "Catherine," he said meekly.

She turned and smiled at him. "That was…incredible," she whispered.

Relief flooded his face but then he turned somber. "I um…" his hand caressed her thigh as he seemed to collect his thoughts. "Thing is…I…well, I'm not very good at relationships…"

A vise clamped down on her heart. _Not good with relationships? So that was it? Slam, bam, thank you ma'm and back to Vegas we go?" _So what are you telling me Jim, that this was a one night stand and we're back to the usual in the morning?" Tears welled behind her eyes but she was determined not to cry in front of him.

Alarms rang throughout his body. "No…no, not at all. I…well, I'm trying to warn you, I guess. I have a lousy track record." He could see the hurt in her eyes and he knew he needed to get it out there, say what he was feeling. "But, if you're willing to take a gamble with me…" Looking at her, he was overwhelmed. "God Catherine, I love you…you are so incredible and you make me feel …oh geez, how you make me feel." _Breathe Jimmy, breathe. _"I want…" Fear began to creep in again as he considered the possibility that she wasn't looking for long term commitments.

The pressure from the tears began to subside as she realized she wasn't getting the brush off. "You want what, Jim?"

"I want you, the whole package; the real deal. I want us to build a relationship, something for the long haul…'til death do us part and all that. But I know I'm not exactly your style; I'm kind of sour and all used up, not to mention that I'm past my prime in the looks department. The wear and tear is showing on me but I'm loyal and I'll be there for you and…I love you." _There, you said it. Good job._

She looked at the sincerity in his face and saw love in his eyes, along with apprehension. "I'm Sam Braun's daughter; gambling's in my blood, Jim. The stakes are high for both of us, but I'm all in," she smiled.

He pulled her to him, his hand moving behind her head and his fingers running through her hair. They settled into the bed as he held her against him, relief flowing through him along with happiness. "I love you, Catherine," he whispered.

She moaned softly, contentedly. A moment later she whispered his name, possessively. "Jim…"

"Yeah?"

"Nothing. I just wanted to say your name." She wasn't sure why, but saying his name made it all real to her. _He loves me, really loves me. What was it he said? The real deal? I'm in a real deal. He'll love me, he won't use me like most of the others. I can depend on him always…for the long haul._

They fell asleep in each others arms. Through the rest of the night they remained connected even as they shifted positions in their sleep. And when they woke in the morning, they were spooned, Jim wrapped behind Catherine, his arm draped over her and her hand holding his. As his head cleared and he became more and more aware of her, Jim whispered into her ear. "This is the best morning ever."

She sighed happily. "Yes, it is."

oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

Okay, no cliffie this time. Let me know what you think. I'm busy working on the next installment.


	16. Saying GoodBye

The headed for separate showers, time being a concern. This was the last morning of the reunion and Jim wanted to go down for breakfast with his buddies. Jim was impressed when he had to wait only ten minutes for Catherine after he had dressed. She appeared in the adjoining doorway and as her eyes settled on him, she smiled. He stepped to her, basking in the warmth of her countenance.

Catherine let out a small gasp as she looked into his sparkling eyes and saw the depth of his emotions. Their eyes did most of the communicating until he lifted his hand to her face. "I love you," he said simply.

She felt like she was glowing. His words, his attitude, his touch combined to lift her, sending her into a state of euphoria. Her hand covered his as she spoke. "You keep telling me that…"

"Because it is true," he said adoringly.

"But …"

"I need to say it Catherine. I need to tell you…What I'm feeling right now…I'll explode if I don't say it."

"But I haven't said…"

His voice was gentle as he cut her off. "I know. It's okay…when you're ready. But I still need to say it; I want you to know how you make me feel."

"Do you have any idea how you make me feel when you tell me that you love me?"

"I hope it's good," he said, his eyes still locked on hers.

Her eyes sparkled as she nodded. "Oh…very good. No one has ever said that to me and meant it the way you mean it."

That just seemed all wrong to Jim but as he looked at her expression, he knew that was how she felt. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tightly, his hand caressing her back. Whispering in her ear he told her, "that's not right. You deserve love Catherine. You deserve someone who sees you for who you are, understands the choices you've had to make and what those choices cost you, and respects you. If Eddie and the others didn't do that, then it's on them because you are a very special woman. They missed out on knowing that; missed out on the gift you were offering them by loving them."

Catherine indulged in the feel of his arms around her, his body next to hers. He felt warm and comfortable and as he whispered to her, she realized that in Jim she might have finally found what she had spent her life looking for; someone who loved her for herself. He didn't look at her and see exotic dancer or sex kitten; he saw _her_, Catherine. And he loved what he saw. Knowing that, she wanted to stay in his arms forever.

They stood like that, Jim quietly offering strength and comfort and Catherine happily accepting it. _This is the way it's supposed to work, _she thought_. Give and take, things going both ways. Here he is, facing his past demons again and he's offering love and comfort to me. I want this; I want him. I want…but, o yeah … breakfast…_

"Jim, I think I could stay here in your arms forever, but we need to get down to breakfast."

Reluctantly Jim released his hold on her. "Okay. But we're going to do a lot of that," he said with glowing eyes. A small smile worked at her mouth as she looked into his eyes. "Is that a promise?" His face bore such gentleness that her chest tightened. "Promise," he said lightly.

Corky and some of the others were already in the room that had been reserved for them. Jim and Catherine went to the buffet and filled their plates before joining the small group. Corky looked up at Jim knowingly. "Had a restful night?' he asked playfully. Catherine smirked at the 'drop dead' look that Jim shot Corky.

The buddies began talking again, exchanging e-mail addresses and promising to keep in touch. Catherine was looking around the room and saw Jack Whitlock watching them from the other side. When he saw her looking his way, he smiled suggestively and winked. Catherine shot him a look that could freeze a volcano but he matched her glare, his eyes never wavering. His look sent ice through her veins. She turned her attention back to Jim and the others, hoping Whitlock would find something else more interesting.

Just as the group was finishing their meal, Nancy and Kenny walked in. Out of the corner of her eye Catherine saw Nancy glaring at Jim. Deciding to take advantage of the opportunity to goad the woman, Catherine put her hand over Jim's, which was sitting on the table. He hadn't seen Nancy and didn't know what Catherine was planning. But when her hand covered his, he smiled and turned to her, winking. Then he sat back in his chair, wrapping his arm behind Catherine and resting it on the back of her chair. His hand settled possessively on her shoulder. _Perfect,_ she thought.

"Good morning everybody." Nancy's voice sounded more vicious than usual.

They all looked up at her and returned her greeting. But her attention was focused on Jim and Catherine. "You two seem especially cheerful this morning." Her tone was vindictive.

Jim smiled. "Yeah, it's been a great weekend." Catherine added to his comment. "Yeah, and last night was…_really special. _No one missed the meaning of her words. "Oh, the dance and all, you know." Her expression was innocent but she could tell her dart had met its target as Nancy bristled.

"The dance wasn't all that special," Nancy snidely remarked.

"Oh, you didn't think so? I thought it was _wonderful, _Catherine replied breathlessly, looking at Jim meaningfully. Jim began to realize he had been set up but couldn't help but be amused by Catherine's antics. She really was out to get under Nancy's skin and a part of Jim was gleeful about it. So he decided to join in. "Yeah," he said as he gazed into Catherine's eyes. "But sometimes it depends on who you are with…" Catherine looked down coyly as Jim continued. "Who you are dancing with, I mean."

The men at the table all chuckled. They knew exactly what had been wonderful about Jim's night and it wasn't dancing…well, vertical dancing anyway.

Nancy was seething. She glared at Catherine. "Well, I suppose that when you are with someone as _experienced_ as she is, then it does make things more interesting."

Jim bristled. "Better watch who you are calling experienced, Nancy." His voice was low and cold.

"Surely you're kidding, Jim. It's as plain as day…"

Catherine was in her face before Jim could even stand up. "Look you bitch, everyone here knows what you are. I've heard them talking. At first I thought it was just Jim that you cheated on but apparently it's a pattern with you. He was the best thing that ever happened to you and you threw him out like yesterday's trash. Well, you know what they say; one man's trash is another man's treasure and I treasure him. I'm smart enough to know what a gift his love is. There's not a man alive who is more loving and caring…and loyal, than Jim. It's too bad you were stupid enough to throw that away. But you're not going to hurt him anymore, understand? He's mine and people who mess with what's mine regret it."

Nancy backed a step away and glared at her. "Who the hell are you to come here and…"

"Anybody here ever heard of Sam Braun?"

Corky looked at Catherine. "Yeah, he was a big wheel in Vegas, supposedly had mob connections all the way back here." Then he looked at her with new eyes. "That was the Sam you were talking about the other night?"

Nancy looked from Catherine to Corky. "What the hell does this Sam fella have to do with this?"

Catherine glared back at her. "You wanted to know who the hell I am. I'm Sam Braun's daughter. No one messed with what was Sam's. He taught me from the earliest time I can remember to protect what was mine." Her stare at the other woman was deadly. "And Jim is mine; he belongs to me as much as I belong to him. You go after him, you're going after me and a world of hurt will land on your scrawny ass."

"Catherine," Jim said quietly. He knew he had let things go too far. "It's okay…let it go."

Catherine glared at Nancy and then turned towards Jim, her whole demeanor changing in the transition. "Yeah, I'm sorry. It's just…what she did to you; it makes me angry."

"It's the past, honey. You're my future; that's all that matters anymore."

Corky was awed by what he had witnessed. "Jimmy, you did it. You finally did it."

Jim looked at Corky, confused. "Did what?"

"Found Ms. Right; a woman that'll be there for you, in your corner."

Jim smiled. "Yeah." Then glancing back at Catherine, he echoed a softer, "yeah…"

Nancy glared at the two with balled fists. "You two deserve each other; the screw up and the slut."

Corky stepped between Nancy and the couple. "Kenny, why don't you and Nancy try the buffet. The food's pretty good."

Kenny looked around the group, his eyes settling on Nancy last. Disgust was written all over him. "Nancy can eat wherever she wants to but I'm out of here." Looking at Jim, he cleared his throat. "Jimmy, I'm really sorry. I had no idea that she would act like this. I'm beginning to understand why she suddenly developed an interest in me a couple of months ago. She wanted a way in just in case you showed up. I hope you and your lady there find happiness. God knows, after Nancy you deserve it." He turned and left the room.

Nancy was still fuming. Jim was glaring at her and she knew she was getting to him. "Ellie said you told her she'd become plumbing, Jim. Is that what your little whore here is, plumbing for you to screw? Everybody knows what …"

Her sentence was cut off as Jim nudged Corky aside and stood in her face. "Shut up, Nancy. Shut the hell up. You don't need to be talking about Ellie in front of the room and you _sure as hell don't need to be talking about Catherine like that. I don't want to hear anything about her coming out of your filthy mouth again, you got me? _His voice had risen as he'd finished and most of the room was watching uncomfortably.

"You sorry son of a bitch, how dare you talk to me like that? You haven't changed one bit have you?" Nancy's voice had almost become a shriek as she fired back at Jim.

Catherine edged next to Jim and began stroking his arm. "Jim, leave it. I'm sorry; I shouldn't have gotten into it with her. Please Jim…"

Fury was written in his features and Catherine couldn't remember ever seeing him that angry. The tension within him was palpable as he stood there, glaring at his ex-wife.

Just as Catherine thought she detected a change in Jim, that he might be ready to back off, Nancy started again. "How did it feel when you visited Ellie in LA? She told me you hooked back up with that slut, Kramer. You two get it on again while you were there?

Catherine gasped at the venom that the other woman spewed. She could feel the fury that her latest comments had sparked as Jim's arm shook beneath her hand. He just stood there shaking as he glared. Catherine knew that it was taking every ounce of his self control to keep his anger from becoming physical. "Nancy, please leave before you further embarrass yourself. This isn't the time or place to discuss these things." Catherine's tone was quiet but strong.

Nancy looked around. Even in her anger, she realized what everybody was thinking. Feeling the animosity that was directed at her from all sides, she huffed and then walked out. The atmosphere got decidedly lighter as she left.

Catherine turned to the group. "I'm sorry guys. I didn't mean to turn your last morning into a showdown, but she just got to me. I just couldn't watch her go after Jim anymore."

It was Jerry that spoke for the group. "Hey, not a problem. We're glad Jimmy finally has someone who appreciates him and will stand in his corner with him. Jimmy is one of the best of us and has paid a high price for it, Catherine. Looks like with you maybe he's getting something of what he really deserves."

"Thank you Jerry," smiled Catherine. "Not for what you said about me but for acknowledging Jim. He is one of the best but he doesn't seem to believe that." She was watching Jim as his eyes followed Nancy out of the room; the anger was subsiding and being replaced with remorse.

Jim was embarrassed by as they talked about him. "Look guys…" he began, waving his hand as if dismissing them. "I've just tried to do my best…" Recognizing his discomfort, they changed the subject and were soon chatting again.

Slowly the group broke up and one by one they left until only Corky still sat at the table with Jim and Catherine. "Well, Jimmy… it's been grand seeing you again. Getting together with you one last time was one of the things on my list. You were a great friend growing up and I've always known that if I ever needed a friend, you'd be there for me in a flash. For all the pranks we pulled and the mischief we created, you always played it straight when it counted and I admire that. All through my career when I was faced with tough choices, I asked myself what Jimmy would do and I did what I thought you would do. It served me well and I have no regrets."

Tears formed in both men's eyes as the gravity of the moment settled on them. Catherine had a trail of tears down her cheeks as she watched and listened to the two men.

"It's been an honor for me to call you my friend," continued Corky. "Thank you."

Jim walked to Corky and wrapped him in a bear hug, holding him tightly, tears trickling down Jim's face. "The honor is mine," he replied. They stepped back and looked into one another's eyes, silently communicating the bonds they felt from a lifetime of friendship. "Good luck," Jim finally managed to say.

Corky nodded. Grinning he looked at Catherine. Then looking back at Jim, he spoke sincerely. "And good luck to you, my friend." He patted Jim's shoulder and then walked away, heading out of the room. Jim watched him walk away, knowing that it would be the last time he'd see Corky. His shoulders slumped as sadness filled him. Quietly Catherine moved next to him, wrapping her arm through his and squeezing in silent acknowledgement of his grief. His smile was sad as he looked at her. "Come on, let's get checked out. I'm finished here."

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Okay, I just couldn't see Catherine actually getting into a brawl with Nancy; I hope this was close enough. There's a little more to the story. You know how to make it happen:-)


	17. Safe

In the lobby, Catherine told Jim she'd head upstairs to finish packing while he settled the bill. He nodded and headed for the desk. She stepped into an elevator and just as the door was closing, Jack Whitlock rushed in. Catherine edged toward the opposite side, trying to keep an eye on him without making eye contact. The guy gave her the creeps and she wanted as much distance as she could get.

The door opened on her floor and she stepped out, turning to head to her room. After a few steps, she realized Whitlock was behind her. She grew more and more nervous as he followed her down the hall. Scanning the hallway, she considered her options and decided to try to head back to the elevator. Going to her room would mean spending a few seconds at her door, plenty of time for him to trap her. So she made a turn at a hall that crossed to the next hall and then headed back.

She had taken only a few steps, however when she felt his hand on her arm and he yanked her back towards her room. He grabbed the room key that she had been holding and covered her mouth with his hand with a not too gentle squeeze. Using his own body to pin her against the wall, he reached over and unlocked the door and then shoved her inside.

"So you're Jimmy's new girl? He always did have good tastes. I'll bet you are better than any of the others. Wanna give me a taste?" He was leering and his tone was sinister.

Catherine was mad by now though and wasn't going to let him intimidate her. "In your dreams…"

He jerked her arm and then pushed her to the bed. He tried to kiss her but she turned her face, avoiding his lips. Then he slapped her, knocking her down onto the bed. "Bitch," he growled before descending on her. Catherine raised her knees to try to hold him off but her grabbed her leg and jerked it straight then kneed her. She let out a cry of pain and scratched his face, drawing blood. "You're gonna be sorry you did that, bitch. I was gonna be gentle but…"

She felt him being jerked off of her and then saw Jim. He had Jack by his shirt collar and grabbed his arm with the other hand. Suddenly Whitlock's face was being smashed into the wall with a loud thud. "Call downstairs for security," Jim told her. As she reached for the phone, Jim punched Whitlock in the side, nearly crumpling him. Whitlock gasped for breath and then tried to turn to hit Jim. Jim smashed him back into the wall, took his arm and pulled it up behind him, yanking as hard as he could until Whitlock yelled in pain. "You like pain, Jack?" Jim growled at him.

Catherine quickly explained to the voice on the phone and they assured her that security was on its way. She had seen this side of Jim many times and knew he often would push the limits but always managed to step back at the right time. But this was personal to him, and she was afraid he wouldn't stop. Her fears were confirmed when he grabbed Whitlock by the hair and pounded his head into the wall. "You sorry little piece of shit," he told Whitlock as he pounded his head repeatedly.

Security burst into the room. "Jim," Catherine said. He didn't seem to hear so she said his name louder. Then, looking surprised, he looked at her. "Jim, security is here. Let him go."

Jim took a breath and then stepped back, releasing Whitlock. "He has a record for sexual assault and rape. I would imagine his attack on Ms. Willows is in violation of parole," he told the security officer.

"Okay, sir. We'll hold him until the police arrive. They've already been called. You'll need to give a statement."

"Yeah…" Jim said sourly as he made his way to Catherine. She was sitting on the edge of the bed and Jim bent in front of her to get a good look at her face. "You okay?"

"Yeah, I think so. I'm glad you got here when you did though…" Now that her adrenaline was receding, fear was setting in. "I…how did you…"

"I saw him jump into the elevator with you. I just knew it was trouble…" he said as he looked closely at the mark Whitlock's hand left on her face. "He hit you anywhere else?"

"Yeah, he kneed me…but I think…"

"Let me see," he insisted.

Catherine raised her top to show Jim where Whitlock's knee connected. He felt around the area, watching her response. "Does it hurt?"

"It's tender, but what you would expect. I don't think it's anything serious."

Jim looked back at her face. "Let's get some ice on that," he told her. After retrieving some ice and making a make-shift ice pack, much as she had done when he hurt his toe, he held it to her cheek. "Honey, I'm sorry this happened. I should have come up here with you."

"Jim, there was no reason to think I wouldn't be safe. It's not your fault."

He sat quietly beside her as he held the ice to her face. He needed to do that, take care of her. He wanted to. But he was also angry; angry at himself, still angry at Nancy, and furious with Jack Whitlock. "I had a full afternoon of sightseeing planned in New York but now it seems we'll be stuck giving statements to the police," he told her.

"Really," she smiled, her eyes shimmering. "What did you have planned?"

"The Empire State Building, Grand Central Station, The World Trade Center site, Battery Park, Wall Street maybe. I was going to let you choose. And then tonight…"

"You have something special planned for tonight? Another show?"

"No, not a show, well…not Broadway anyway. But I think I'll keep it as a surprise for now."

Catherine could feel him beginning to relax, but her nerves were still pretty shaky. "For now…please, would you just hold me?"

Jim put the ice pack down and then surrounded her with his arms, pulling her close to him. "Like this, Baby?"

"Mmmm, like this. I need this. You …make me feel safe," she said, fighting back the emotions that she had refused to give into during the attack.

"God Catherine, if he had…well…the thought of him…geez Baby, I'm just glad I got here when I did; saw him get into the elevator." Jim was trying to stay calm for her sake but his stomach was in his throat as he considered the 'what ifs.'

Her hand worked inside his jacket and she could feel his heartbeat. It was strong and rapid, disclosing his state of emotions. He pulled her tighter to him and buried his face in her neck, whispering her name. The attack had frightened him as much as it had her, she realized. His reaction, his attention to her, and the depth of his fear for her all combined to clarify her feelings for him. Pulling away and looking deep into his moisture filled eyes. "I love you, Jim."

A smile, a like response, or a kiss would not have surprised Catherine. But instead he just gazed at her, a few tears trickling down his face as his expression changed. Fear changed to joy and adoration as he looked at her. His hand stroked her hair as more emotion welled up inside of him. Swallowing, he then took a short breath as he continued the battle to hold back tears. Then he gathered her into a hug, squeezing her tightly; his hand held the back of her head, his fingers interlacing with strands of her hair. "Catherine," was all he could manage to say.

They remained that way, interlocked, for several minutes until they heard a knock on the door. Jim released her just as the security guard entered with a detective, Joe Collier.. Jim recognized the name; he had been a rookie when Jim was leaving Newark, but their paths had crossed a few times.

Detective Collier looked at Jim warily. "Are you the Jim Brass that was with Newark PD a few years ago?"

"It's been more than a few years, but yes."

"I thought I remembered you. You helped me on a couple of big cases; well, big for me at the time, anyway. It's good to see you again."

Relief swept through Jim. He had not been sure about what sort of treatment he would get from a Newark cop after he'd turned in so many bad cops just before leaving. "Yeah…same here. Glad you stuck with it. I remember you as one of the good ones."

"I've tried to be," Collier smiled. "But I am sorry to see you again under these circumstances. Want to tell me what happened?"

Jim deferred to Catherine for the first part of the story and then he picked up with his involvement. After a few minutes, the detective thought he had enough information. "You were right about Whitlock; he is out on parole and this will put right back in. Plus with the new charges, it'll be a long time before he gets out again."

"Good," growled Jim.

Finally everyone left and it was just Catherine and Jim again. "Let's get out of here," she suggested.

"Yeah," he agreed. And then, "Catherine?"

She had begun packing again but turned to look him, responding to the tenderness in his voice.

"I love you," he said.

She smiled, winked at him, and said, "I'm counting on it." As she returned to her packing.

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So, you like?


	18. Afternoon Delight

A few hours later they stood on the observation deck of The Empire State Building. Catherine looked out over the city in amazement. Jim simply looked at her. She felt his gaze and smile shyly. Cocking her head and turning it slightly towards him she asked, "Don't you want to see the view?"

He grinned. "I am enjoying my own view."

Just then a gust of wind whipped around, blowing her hair. He watched the play of colors as the red and blonde danced in the breeze. Taking a mental snapshot, he committed to memory the sight of her standing there. He wanted to remember everything about this day; it was the day she told him that she loved him; the best day of his life. Her words had touched his soul, reawakening something within him that he thought was long dead, a faith of sorts, a belief that perhaps he was meant to have happiness in this life. It wasn't that he was by nature a sad person, but true happiness always seemed to evade him. And then there was the loneliness. As bad as things were with Nancy, at least she had been there, someone in his life. After he left her, left Jersey, the loneliness had been almost unbearable. He'd tried several different tactics to relieve his grief, but nothing worked; not booze or women, or his job.

As he stood there looking at her he felt at peace, a sensation that he was unfamiliar with. _She's so beautiful, _he thought_. And full of life. And love…she loves me. _The thought made him giddy. _Catherine loves Jim…Jim loves Catherine…_A small grin threatened as he contemplated this new turn of events in his life._ She loves you, Jimmy. And she wants you…You're gonna get it right this time; you have to._

He realized he was standing there looking foolish and she was chuckling at him. He smiled and tilted his head questioningly. "You look like a love struck teenager," she commented.

"I feel like one."

She moved closer to him, putting her hand on his chest. "Jim, would you mind if we skip the rest of the sight seeing and just go back to the hotel?"

"Mind? No. But I thought…"

"Right now all I want is…you," she muttered suggestively.

Surprised, "oh," escaped before he could think of something better to say.  
"Okay." _Smooth Jimmy…really smooth,_ he chastised himself as he led her off the deck.

All the way back to the hotel parts of an old song from the seventies ran through Jim's mind. He couldn't remember all the words but what he did remember kept playing in his head.

… _Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight._

Thinkin' of you's workin' up my appetite  
looking forward to a little afternoon delight.  
Rubbin' sticks and stones together makes the sparks ignite  
and the thought of rubbin' you is getting so exciting.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight.

Started out this morning feeling so polite…

_  
Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight._

… We could make a lot of lovin' 'for the sun goes down.

Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight.

He knew why she wanted to go back to the hotel and while he woke up that morning just content to be with her, now his blood was beginning to boil. _I didn't think guys my age could feel this way; god what she does to me…_

_Sky rockets in flight. Afternoon delight. Afternoon delight._

They behaved like mature adults until the door to their room closed behind them and then Catherine was all over him. Jim had expected to seduce her and he had grown more and more excited as they made their way back, but this…Catherine being the aggressor, so obviously in need of him was mind blowing. Her kiss was fiery and demanding; Jim was struggling to catch up but delighting in the effort. Her fire ignited him and within seconds they were on the bed, sans clothes, consumed by the blaze that enveloped them both.

Catherine's hands sparked little fires on his skin as she caressed and groped him. Her lips were hot as they traveled from his lips to his neck and down his chest. He tried to caress and kiss her, be the man; but what she was doing to him…her touches, her kisses, her attention to his details were too much and he surrendered to her magic. He laid there, the object of her passion; weak kneed and powerless, reacting instead of acting, floating in a state of agonizing ecstasy; wondering how much more he could take. "Oh Baby," he moaned as she massaged his lower extremities, carefully avoiding the place he most wanted her. "You're such a tease," he whined.

She looked up long enough to smile wickedly at him and then continued her pursuit of his body. "You're driving me crazy," he growled, only to be answered by a lusty chuckle. Mustering all of his willpower he turned the tables, flipping her onto her back and pursuing her lips, her neck, and her body until she was writhing beneath him and moaning his name. Their game continued, each driving the other to the brink until finally they were joined, coming together in a fog of lust and love. Jim felt complete when they were one and that sensation alone was enough to satisfy him.

Then the fireworks began…_ Sky rockets in flight_…the inside of his head turning into blazing white light as his body found release with hers. As satisfying as it was physically, being with her was also a spiritual experience for Jim. He was beginning to believe in life again.

They lay there, still wrapped in each other for a long time without speaking or moving; each content in the sensation created by the presence of the other. For Jim, it was heaven. Eventually she broke the silence. "That was…incredible," she whispered. Jim squeezed her and then gently kissed the top of her head. _Incredible…she thinks I was incredible; we were incredible together. Wow._ His male ego swelled at her three little words but Jim was wise enough to keep it to himself. "You are incredible," he whispered back. "I love you, Catherine."

She snuggled into him deeper, as if she couldn't get close enough. "Jim, you always call me Catherine. I don't think I've ever heard you call me Cat or Cath like the others do?"

"Yeah?"

"But why?"

Jim kissed the top of her head again as his fingers began to trace lazy circles on her upper arm and shoulder. "Cat is…well, that was who you were at The Palace; you're not that girl anymore. I'm not sure you ever really were. Although, you do have a flirtatious side…" he paused as she gently swatted him. "And Cath, is…I guess its okay, but it somehow seems too little. But Catherine, that fits. Catherine says 'real woman', classy and sophisticated, very feminine and flirty but not tacky or trashy. It just fits."

"That's how you see me…classy, I mean?"

"Yeah. I know everybody has a little different take on what classy is, but I think anyone who knows you would call you that. You proved it with the way you handled Nancy. 'Cat' would've scratched her eyes out. But you beat her with words and had the room cheering you on."

She lifted her head to look at his face. "I wanted to scratch her eyes out, though."

Grinning he nodded. "I know you did, but you didn't do it."

"So you like sophisticated?"

"I like your kind of sophistication. But when we're alone…like this, I wouldn't mind if Cat came to visit for awhile sometimes either."

"What? You like trashy?"

"Well, not exactly. But Cat was a sex kitten. Besides, I heard you gave one helleva lap dance." The grin on his face was salacious.

Her answering smile was just as lewd. "You want me to give you a lap dance?"

"Right now I want you right where you are. But maybe sometime…"

"I'll remember that," she said as her head rested back in the crook of his shoulder.

He felt her slide into sleep but Jim was still wide awake. His senses were too active, his nerves too responsive. Everything about her played through his body; her smell… especially after their coupling, the feel of her next to him, the salty sweetness of her whenever he nibbled at her, and the softness of her skin had him feeling so alive, effervescent almost. The feelings she evoked within him were almost too much but he liked it. If he slept, he might miss some of it. So he remained awake, listening to her contented breathing and celebrating her nearness. Jim Brass was a happy man; a very, very happy man.

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Afternoon Delight was a fun song by The Starland Vocal Band. It just seemed to fit this chapter, lol. Hope you enjoyed.


	19. Contentment

Jim's idea of a show was pretty impressive, Catherine decided as they stood on the deck of a boat, cruising New York harbor. The city lights were amazing with various landmark buildings standing out along the skyline. A band was playing inside and the beat of the music could be heard on the deck. But they weren't dancing. Instead, Jim was standing behind her, his arms wrapped around her as he held her close to him. Occasionally he would point to something along the skyline and explain but mostly they remained quiet, content to be so close.

Catherine watched the buildings go by and wished briefly that they didn't have to go back to Vegas the next day. _This is like a fairy tale or something, _she thought as she snuggled further back into his embrace. _I don't want to wake up from the dream…_

The love making in the afternoon had been awesome. Waking up next to him had been better. She had been on her side with him spooned around her, nibbling at her neck and softly whispering her name. She liked the sound of him when he whispered her name. Standing here with him holding her, the feelings of completion from earlier were reinforced.

Jim pointed to the Statue of Liberty in the distance and Catherine watched as it grew closer. Lights shone all around her, making her visible to all who were in the harbor. Lady Liberty was beautiful.

As she watched Liberty in the distance, Catherine thought about the man holding her. _How could I have known him for so many years and not known this side of him? I've always known he had a tender side…but he's always covered it with gruffness. But as a lover; he's so gentle…shy at times even. And a man has never made me feel the way he does; he lifts me up while most of the others pulled me down…_

She leaned back into him more and sighed which prompted him to gently squeeze her. As she relished that little pleasure, she felt his warm breath on her neck just behind her ear. "I love you," he whispered. "I want to hold you like this forever."

She turned and looked into his face, captivated by what she saw there…his heart. Suddenly she was filled with an overwhelming sense of responsibility as she realized he was giving himself to her and she could break his heart again. And Jim didn't deserve to have that happen to him. Silently she made a promise to herself and to him that it wouldn't happen. She would take the beautiful gift he was offering, himself, and treasure it. "Now that's convenient because I want to be in your arms forever," she whispered back with a smile.

Her smile lit Jim's world and he knew his happiness would revolve around her from that moment on. His number one priority in life became her in that one moment. For Jim Brass nothing else would matter more than Catherine for as long as she would allow him to rotate around her. She was his star and he was willingly caught in her orbit. He loved her that much.

Later that night, as they lay in bed, Jim held her. Physical contact had not been broken between the two for more than a few seconds since they stood at the railing of the boat earlier. As he held her next to him now, his thoughts were loving but not sexual; he simply enjoyed having her close. More out of habit than anything, Catherine began to try to arouse him but his hand stopped her. "Honey, would you mind…I mean as much as I enjoy sex with you, right now I just want to hold you and love you…"

A myriad of confusing emotions filled her. Since when did a guy ever turn down sex with her? Should she be offended? But he didn't seem unhappy with the idea…just in a different kind of mood. Still…he had proven to her over the weekend that there were no problems in that department, so why was he holding her off? And then, as if sensing her confusion, he began caressing her back. "This afternoon was fantastic but right now, I just want to hold you and feel you next to me. I've never been this…content to just be with someone before. Right now, this is all I need."

"Right now," she responded, "You are all I need." She snuggled closer to him, savoring the warmth of his body and the steady rhythm of his breathing. As she lay there, listening to the steady beat of his heart and running her fingers gently over his skin, she admitted that this quiet between them was perfect. In fact, it was so perfect that she began to worry. "What about when we get back?" she asked fearfully.

"Hmm? What about it?" He asked lazily.

"What about us?"

She felt him tense at her question. "I…well, I thought you understood…" he began.

Suddenly Catherine felt the proverbial bucket of ice water hit her. _This is it; this is where it ends…_

Jim sensed her fear as she stiffened next to him. "Honey, I thought I was clear. I love you, I want you…I want _us._ This is just the beginning of what I hope will be a lifetime thing…at least, that's the way I'm looking at it." Fear suddenly struck at him._ What if she doesn't see it that way?_

"Lifetime?" she asked nervously. "As in 'til death do us part?"

"Eventually. Baby, I want this to work so I don't want to rush into a commitment that we aren't quite ready for. And we have to consider Lindsey too. She needs time to get used to the idea…"

"She'll be happy about it, I think." Catherine was imagining her daughter's response to Jim being the man in her life.

"I hope she will but I don't want to push it on her. When we get back, I intend to spend every minute with you that I can, but this is going to mean changes in all of our lives. Let's make sure they are good changes."

Catherine considered his words. "So, me asking you to move in is premature?"

Jim chuckled. "Probably, although the idea is tempting. We'll know when it's time."

"I'll miss this…I'll miss you."

"Yeah," he agreed. "This is nice. But we'll make some time for this…and for more. But I'm going to have a hellava time sleeping in my cold lonely bed now."

Catherine heard the smile in his voice and quietly agreed. "Then I'll have to come over and warm your sheets from time to time…" She was surprised by the small grunt she heard from him.

"I've changed my mind," he growled.

"What?"

"I've changed my mind." And then he kissed her…and kissed her…and then, he kissed her again.

"What happened to your contentment?" she wondered aloud.

"I'll get back to it later," he smiled as his hands roamed her body.

The next morning, they ate breakfast and packed. Catherine watched as the taxi drove them through the city to the airport. One on board their plane, Catherine looked at Jim. "It's been like a fairy tale; it's hard to think about going back."

"Yeah?" Jim smirked. "Which one, _Beauty and the Beast_?"

"More like Snow _White and the Seven Dwarfs_. You'd be Grumpy," she snickered.

"No," he stated flatly.

"No?"

"The dwarfs don't get the Beauty; Prince Charming does."

"That egotistical swine? Not in _my_ fairy tale, he doesn't."

Their conversation continued for a few minutes before they each settled into a reverie, pondering the changes in their lives brought about by a simple class reunion.

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Good enough? Stop there or keep going?


	20. Back to Reality

Once they landed in Vegas, Jim retrieved their bags and drove Catherine to her house. He carried hers into her house and then the two stood awkwardly in her living room. Neither wanted the magic of the trip to end but the reality of normal life was slowly creeping in. "I should go and let you get unpacked and ready for Lindsey when she gets home from school," Jim told her.

Catherine stepped to him. "No, not yet…" she said as her hand went to his chest. "There's still plenty of time before I need to go pick her up."

After a short intake of breath, Jim asked her, "Time for?"

"I'm not ready yet…to let you go."

He smiled, taking her face in his hands. "You think I could ever go very far?" He looked into her eyes, hoping his own communicated all that he was feeling. ""I meant what I said, I love you and I want _us._ Things will be different now that we are back, but my feelings haven't changed." His arms wrapped around her in a tender hug.

She melted into him, responding to the strength of his emotions; feeling the same.

"_Catherine_?" They heard the voice from the back of the house. "Catherine, is that you?" Lily's voice carried from the bedrooms.

"Yeah, Mom. We're back." Catherine's voice carried down the hall.

Lily appeared just as Catherine stepped away from Jim. The older woman's face lit as she caught the obvious implications of her daughter's motion. "You had a good time?"

Catherine smiled. "Yes. We did. It was a wonderful trip. Everything okay here?"

"Sure. Lindsey is at school of course. But she was excited that you'd be picking her up today." Looking at Jim, Lily spoke to him. "How are you, Jim?"

"I'm fine Lily. It was a nice trip."

Lily looked back at her daughter and studied her face. "What happened?" she asked as she spotted the mark left on Catherine's face by Jack Whitlock.

"Oh…" Catherine said as her hand went to the spot. "I'd almost forgotten. A creep followed me in the hotel and tried something, but Jim took care of him." She smiled in Jim's direction as she finished.

Lily looked worriedly from Catherine to Jim. "A creep?"

"Yeah, one of the guys at the reunion," Jim answered. "He followed Catherine to her room."

"But you stopped him?" Lily asked.

"Yeah," he said uncomfortably.

"Thank you." She was smiling at him. "Sam always said you were one of the good ones. There weren't many cops he respected, you know."

Jim grinned. "I appreciate that. I think Sam would have come back to haunt me if I let anything happen to his Muggs, don't you?"

Both women chuckled. "Yes, he would," Lily answered. "Well look, how about some tea? I was just headed to the kitchen to make some for myself."

Catherine's eyes pleaded with him to stay. "Okay, yeah…tea sounds good."

The three chatted over the tea and then finally Jim declared that he needed to head home. Standing at the front door, Catherine kissed him.

"Call me later," he said. "After you and Lindsey get caught up."

Once Jim had left, Lily's questions started. "So, what happened on this trip, Catherine? Jim's too good a man for you to be playing games with his emotions."

Catherine sighed. _Why is she assuming that I'm toying with him?_ "No games, Mom. I can't explain it, but there was a spark. Seems he had feelings for me for a long time and I…well, I discovered a side of Jim I never knew. He's…well, he can be very romantic…"

Lily gave her a disbelieving look. "You sound like you're Lindsey's age… like a schoolgirl with a crush. Be careful, Catherine. Jim's not the type that falls easily; you could break his heart."

"I know Mom," Catherine said, rolling her eyes. "But, I'm not toying with him. He wants a relationship and so do I."

"Okay, okay. Just remember what I said."

"Yeah…look, it's time for me to get Lindsey. I'll be back in a little while."

Catherine grabbed the car keys and hurried out of the house. Her mind filled with doubts as she drove to Lindsey's school. _Mom is right…I could break his heart. What if…what if it doesn't work out? What if I mess things up? What if…but no, he's not like anyone else I've ever dated. This time things are going to be different._

She pulled into the school drive and waited outside for her daughter to appear. Her mind continued to contemplate the events of the past few days and the potential consequences…and rewards, she reminded herself. Jim wasn't a glamorous kind of guy and life with him would be tame compared to some of her previous relationships. But what had those gotten her? Eddie had introduced her to the underside of the music industry and created a dangerous brush with drugs. Chris, well…another cheater. And the list went on and on. All cheaters and users. _But not Jim. I can trust him._

The passenger door swung open and Lindsey climbed in. "Mom," she said excitedly.

"Hey baby. I missed you!"

They hugged and then Catherine began the drive home. "So tell me about the trip," Lindsey exclaimed.

Catherine began telling her about the sightseeing in New York. "And by the way, I understand you were in on Jim's conspiracy at Radio City Music Hall…"

"Yeah, he asked for help with it. Did you like it? Was it fun?"

"It was," Catherine laughed. "I worked my butt off but it was a lot of fun."

"Good. Did you get any pictures?"

"They wouldn't let us take any but they are mailing us shots from the workshop. We should have them in a couple of weeks."

"What was it like…dancing on a famous stage like that?"

"Fantastic. And they had us line up to do the high kick…" Catherine talked on and on about the experience. "One day I hope you can go do it."

"That would be great. But I've decided I don't want to be a dancer after all. I mean, I still enjoy it and all but I want to do something else."

"Really? Do you know what?"

"No, but I'll think of something."

They pulled into the driveway and Lindsey hopped out. Catherine followed her inside. In the kitchen, where Lindsey had gone for a snack, Catherine coaxed Lindsey to tell her everything that had happened while she was away. The two chatted until it was almost time to cook supper.

After leaving Catherine's, Jim headed for his house. After unloading his bags from the car, he checked the stack of mail that the neighbor had collected and set on the kitchen counter. After glancing through it, he decided there was nothing that couldn't wait for a leisurely look later.

He separated the clothes he wore on the trip into various piles, one for the dry cleaners went to a chair in the living room, while the ones he would wash landed in the laundry room. In the kitchen, he groaned as he realized the necessity for a trip to the market. Deciding to get it over with, he grabbed his keys and left. About an hour later, he returned with a few bags and placed them in the cupboards.

After that, he poured himself a glass of water and sat in the living room. Jim had always considered his home a sanctuary. It was what realtors would call cozy; small but big enough for him since he was living alone. The décor was masculine and full of his personality. He had chosen to furnish it with a few quality pieces, rather than filling it with cheap furniture. There were a few nice pieces of artwork on his walls… no flowers or fruits; Jim wasn't a flowery kind of guy. His favorite piece on the wall was a lithograph of a winter scene; kids playing hockey on a frozen pond. He liked it because it reminded him of his own youth.

But today, his usually cozy and comfortable sanctuary felt cold and lonely. After several days filled with the warmth of Catherine, his place seemed cold and forlorn. He missed her; just the nearness of her that had filled him with such happiness. Looking at his watch, he knew that he still had hours to fill before she called, before the sound of her voice filled his lonely heart again. Hours.

More from boredom and the need to be oblivious to his loneliness than from fatigue, he decided to take a nap. Stretching out on his bed, he remembered what she said about warming his sheets and suddenly the bed felt very large and empty. He forced himself to remain still and quiet, trying to make sleep come. As he drifted off, he remembered the feel of her next to him which made for some very happy dreams.

A few hours later, Lindsey and Catherine had run out of things to tell one another. Lindsey had been excited to hear about the trip but was growing tired of her mother's company. Catherine sensed that the teen was ready to get to her computer for some IM time and perhaps even a little study time. They had eaten, so Catherine used cleaning the kitchen as her excuse to bow out of the conversation, letting her daughter off the hook. Lindsey fled to her room immediately. Lily helped with the clean up and then headed back to her own place, ready for her own peace and quiet. Alone in the kitchen, Catherine remembered her promise to call Jim when things had settled down.

Grabbing her phone, she headed for her bedroom where she closed the door before dialing his number.

"_Brass,"_ he said on the other end when she called.

"Hey, it's me…"

_Hey," _he said quietly. _"You and Lindsey all talked out?"_

"Yeah. She told me all about everything that happened while I was away and I told her about the trip."

"_Everything?" _She could hear the amusement in his voice.

"No, I left some of the best parts out…" she teased.

"_What parts would that be?"_

"You…going to bed with you and waking up with you; just being with you."

"_I miss you too. My place feels like a prison."_ He sounded forlorn.

"I tried to suggest that you move in here…" She was taunting him now.

"_Yeah…and right now it wouldn't take much to convince me. But I don't think it would be good for Lindsey. I screwed up my relationship with my daughter, Catherine. I'm not going to let you screw up things with Lindsey." _His tone was suddenly serious and firm.

"So, what then?"

"_What time does she go to school?"_

"I'll be back here by 8:30."

"_I'll be waiting on your doorstep. I'll even stop by Crispy Crème on the way"_

"Chocolate Éclairs?" Her body was growing warm thinking about him.

"_Okay. But why those?"_ He sounded confused.

"Big, warm, and creamy…just what I want."

The salaciousness in her voice wasn't lost on Jim. _"Ah…"_

They remained quiet for a minute as her innuendo sank in. "_You like that, huh?"_

"Reminds me of you," she whispered huskily. She pictured him squirming on the other end of the call.

"_Uh…it does? I um…well, I figured that considering some of the studs you'd been with…"_

"You mean smokin' hot and too fast on the draw? I'm learning to appreciate a slow burn…your slow burn. God Jim, the way you make me feel when you make love to me…I didn't know that it could be that good, that …complete."

She heard his intake of breath as her words hit him. _"Baby, it's the way I feel about you. I just want to…make you happy. Besides, I'm staring at 60 pretty hard these days…slow burn is all I got. I can't keep pace with the young guns anymore and I won't try to pretend I can. That kind of worries me actually."_

"Worries you? I didn't see any problems on the trip. You were up for it all…pardon the pun."

"_Yeah, well, it'd been awhile. And you are very beautiful and desirable. But you're quite a few years younger than me…"_

"So what are you telling me? You can't go twice a day everyday, anymore?"

His chuckle was heard from the other end. _"Baby, I'm not sure I could ever do that. But I'm trying to tell you that there's likely to be more hugging and kissing than actual... well, you know…"_

"And you think I'll have a problem with that? God Jim, what kind of animal so you think I am?" she asked giggling.

"_A very passionate one,"_ he answered honestly.

"And why do you think I'm feeling so much passion these days? Honestly Jim for a smart guy, you just don't get it, do you?"

"_I'm still expecting to wake up and find out this is all a dream, baby. And I want to be sure you understand…well, where things are headed."_

"The right direction if you ask me. But you said I'm beautiful and desirable, tell me more…"

So Jim told her, in very clear terms how desirable he found her. By the time his husky voice finished describing her as he saw her; she was hot, very hot.

"Well, tomorrow morning can't get here quickly enough," she told him. "You'd better not be late."

"_I'll be there, ready with the éclairs and all," _he promised.

They finished the conversation and hung up, each left with visions playing in their heads about what the morning would bring. Neither would sleep well that night as their dreams woke them often.

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Okay, so you asked for more and you're getting it, lol. Now you have to do your part and support it with reviews. So, right track? Wrong turn? What?


	21. Real Love

As promised, Jim sat on Catherine's porch the next morning when she pulled in the drive from taking Lindsey to school. He was holding a small box of chocolate éclairs and smirking.

Catherine opened the door and he followed her in. Turning, she took the éclairs from his hands, put them down on the foyer table, and proceeded to commit what in other circumstances might be considered sexual assault. But Jim wasn't complaining about being the victim…not at all.

The onslaught began as soon as the door was closed behind him and continued into the living room. He was marginally aware of their progress through her house until he found himself on her bed with her on top of him. Somewhere along the way he seemed to have lost his clothes, as had she. But nope, he wasn't complaining one bit. He tried to take control of the situation, restrain the assailant, but she was having none of it. He was at her mercy and loving every second of it; loving her.

"God, you are amazing Baby," he murmured as they descended from the ecstasy created by their coupled bodies. Catherine hovered over him, her heavy lidded, satiated eyes gazing into his. "You're not so bad yourself Mr. Éclair. I so enjoyed your different view of big, warm, and creamy."

He pulled her down into a long, loving kiss and then rolled her over, encompassing her in his arms to hold her. "I missed you so much last night, I couldn't sleep," he whispered.

"Me too. I kept having these dreams…"

"Good ones, I hope?" He was nuzzling her ear.

"Oh very good," she smiled, "but not good for sleep."

"Mmmmm, mine too. I um…well, let's just say it's been a long time since certain urges have kept me awake like that. All I could think about was you…"

"Jim, how are we going to do this? What about work? I mean, if we are at a scene together, how am I supposed to keep my mind on the job when all I want is to…well, commit a crime myself."

He snickered. "And what crime would that be? Or was this a sample?"

"Very much a sample. Who knows, I might show up at your office one day, throw you down on your desk and have my way with you. What do you think about that?" Her look was wicked.

"I think I'd be the envy of the PD." He smirked.

"And you'd be struttin' like a peacock as a result, I'll bet."

Grinning, he replied. "I'll be struttin' anyway; that is, if I can walk after your assault just now." He pulled her tighter to him. There was entirely too much distance between them, he thought, and he needed to feel more of her warm skin on his.

Catherine inhaled the scent of him as he wrapped her in a loving cocoon. She felt his warmth and listened to his heartbeat, relishing the effect he had on her senses. "Jim…"

"Yeah Baby?" he said quietly.

"Hold me like this forever…"

"Yeah Baby." And he kissed the top of her head to seal the promise.

They woke, still holding one another, and laid lazily on the bed as the afternoon sun crept further into the room. Jim was content to lay there, his fingers gently travelling across her smooth skin and he thought about this amazing turn of events in his life.

After a few minutes, Catherine glanced at the clock. "Oh my gosh," she exclaimed. "I've got to get moving. It'll be time to pick Lindsey up soon."

Reluctantly they separated and Catherine headed for the bathroom. Jim began searching for his clothes. It took a few minutes since they were strewn along a path through her house. Finally dressed, he waited for her to emerge from the bathroom. "How about I go home and clean up and then pick you and Lindsey up for dinner tonight? We'll let her choose the place. I think we need to let her in on what's going on between us…test the waters."

Catherine tilted her head and smiled at Jim. None, not one, of the men she had dated since Eddie had been interested in including Lindsey in their plans. None had cared how she felt or even if she cared that he was dating her mother. Yet it seemed to be a priority with Jim. She had the sudden realization that if Lindsey had a problem with him in their lives Jim would melt into the background and their developing relationship would quickly revert back to a very deep friendship. Part of her was scared by this thought, but the mother in her was gratified. Maybe she had at last found the right man; she was beginning to believe it with certainty.

"I think that sounds like a wonderful idea. About six then?"

As usual, Jim's smile was more in his eyes than on his mouth. "Six it is. I'll see you both then." He kissed her as if he was already missing her and then left. Catherine stood in the middle of the room, dazed. _How have I missed this all these years?_

Six came and Jim appeared on the Willows doorstep again. Lindsey had been ambivalent about the dinner date but agreed to go. When given a choice, she requested a new pizza place by the mall so Jim drove straight to it.

They had placed their order for pizza and the waitress had brought their drinks. Jim decided to try to thaw some of the ice. "So Lindsey, thank you for helping me with surprising your Mom at Radio City Music Hall. I couldn't have pulled it off without your help."

Lindsey almost smiled at him. "She said it was fun, so you're welcome."

"I wish you could have seen her up on that stage. She looked fantastic."

Lindsey looked from him to her mother. "Yeah, I'll bet she did," she said sarcastically.

Jim frowned. "She really did. It was like she was born to be a Rockette." He looked over at Catherine, who looked like she was ready to strangle her daughter.

"Yeah, she showed me the star key chain. Was that before or after you decided to sleep with her?" Her anger was apparent.

Jim was stunned by the teenager's vehemence. Catherine reacted first. "Lindsey, apologize to Jim."

"Why? You two have done it haven't you. I mean, come on Mom…you spent all that time away…we all knew you'd end up in his bed."

Now there was no doubt. Catherine really did want to strangle her daughter. Jim spoke up. "Lindsey, one of the reasons I wanted to have dinner with you tonight is to talk about this…your mother and I. I mean, we've been friends for a long time, but I told her on this trip that I want more…a longtime relationship. You get what I'm saying?"

"Yeah…sure. You want in her in your bed. Most men do so it's no surprise. The surprise is that she wasn't in it sooner."

Jim sighed, trying to collect more patience. "If that's what you think, then you are missing the point. I love your mother, Lindsey. I want to explore the possibility of a serious relationship with her. But if it is a problem for you, then I won't. I don't want to get between the two of you."

Lindsey glared at him. "Nice tactic….different at least. None of the others tried to use me to get to her…"

"Lindsey!" Catherine exclaimed.

Lindsey looked at her mother. "It's not his fault, you know. Men sniff around you all the time…maybe if you didn't dress like a tramp all the time…but hey, it's who you are, tight?"

Jim hadn't been prepared for this and tried to collect his thoughts. He looked from Lindsey to Catherine and saw how hurt she was by her daughter's comments. "Lindsey," he began, "If you don't want me seeing your mother then just say so."

"Like it'll matter," she fired at him. "She'll do whatever she wants, no matter what I feel about it."

"Lindsey, I am warning you," Catherine said in a low, angry tone.

"What, you'll send me to my room? Yeah, like that'll stick. Don't know what the fuss is all about anyway. He is so not your type."

"Lindsey, stop it now…right now."

"He's short, balding, old…you always like your men young and hot. So why him?"

Catherine's eyes shot to Jim. Lindsey's spite had found its mark; Jim looked shaken. "Not that I owe you an explanation, Lindsey…but Jim is very considerate and loving. I would think that watching me make one mistake after another with men, you would realize that the glamour boys aren't worth the time of day. Besides, Jim is the right height for me, he's not bald, and he is most definitely not old."

"Oh, so that translates as good in bed, I suppose," shot Lindsey.

"Lindsey, please…" Jim pleaded. _This feels like trying to talk to Ellie_, he thought.

Lindsey looked at her mother. "He's just gonna dump you like all the others and then you'll end up crying all night and I'll have to try to help you…"

"Lindsey, Jim's not like that…" Why _am I trying to reason with a teenager, anyway?_

They ate dinner in silence and Jim drove the Willows women back to their house. Lindsey charged inside, leaving Catherine alone with Jim. "Well, that went well," she said sarcastically.

Jim looked at her forlornly. "Maybe this wasn't such a good idea…us, I mean." He stared ahead at some unknown point on the other side of the windshield.

The hurt in his voice made Catherine ache. She reached across the seat and took his hand. "Jim…" she whispered. He turned to look at her and she saw his heartbreak. Tears sat in his eyes, unshed. His face looked crumpled and he looked tired. "I refuse to let Lindsey break us apart. Please Jim…"

A single tear trickled down his cheek. "Baby, I love you. I love you too much to be the source of trouble between you and Lindsey. She's got this thing about you and men…maybe if I'm not around, if you concentrate on her for awhile, she'll get over it."

You can't pay any attention to what she said, Jim. She's just being a teenager…speaking without thinking and reacting through all those hormones."

"Yeah, I know. But she still needs you. And I know how bad things can get when your child gets the wrong idea, thinks you don't love them or something. Not being with you…it'll hurt. But to ignore Lindsey's feelings and push her on this and have things turn out between you and Lindsey like they have between me and Ellie…to have Lindsey turn out like Ellie, that would crush me. I don't ever want you to have to hear things about Lindsey like I've had to hear about Ellie. I love you too much for that."

"But …"

"No Catherine. Where Ellie is concerned, I'm full of regret. I don't want that for you. I won't let it happen. Maybe if we feel the same way after she's grown, but for now…"

Tears were falling freely now. "I love you, Baby," he whispered. "Now please, go see about her. Take care of Lindsey."

She leaned over to kiss him but he turned away, a small sob escaping as he looked out of the window. "Jim?"

"Please…just…" Struggling for control, he couldn't say anymore.

Catherine got out of his car and walked inside, a vise clamping her heart. By the time she made it to the bedroom she was crying uncontrollably. She curled around a pillow on her bed and sobbed until finally, exhausted she fell asleep.

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Okay, please don't shoot me. But we Brass fans know that Jim is perfect; his world isn't.

Also I apologize. I haven't done as well this week with frequent posts. It's been a crazy week with mostly good things happening but still, a lot has been going on that kept me away from the keyboard. I'll try to do better.

Meantime, the little button is still down there somewhere.


	22. Pain and Beyond

Catherine didn't see Jim for a few days. She tried calling him, but only got his voicemail. They guys were commenting on what a foul mood he was in. She thought they were probably saying the same thing about her.

Jim got her various messages, his heart tightening with each one. He avoided crime scenes where he knew she would be. He scheduled himself to work different shifts to lessen the likelihood that they would end up working together and when his shifts ended he went home to bed. Sleep, eat, work…that's all he did for weeks.

Gil asked him what was wrong. But Jim blew him off and growling, asked him when the hell he was going to get Sara back. The two backed into separate corners and nothing more was said. He did work one shift that overlapped with Grave but Nick answered the call. He tried to talk to Jim, tried to be a friend but Jim backed him down too. Sanders just looked at him strangely and kept the hell away. By the end of the fourth week, the hall ways seemed to clear when Jim Brass was in them; nobody wanted to appear in his line of fire.

He had finished his shift and was headed home, his police radio still active, when he heard the call. An incident at a crime scene…a CSI injured…an ambulance called for. CSI Willows transporting to Desert Palm Hospital. Jim's car turned and suddenly he was heading that way. Once at the hospital, he plowed past the nurses and attendants that stood in his way. "CSI Willows?" he barked at the nurse's station in the ER.

"She's in Exam 3 but you can't go in there," was the response.

"Right," he growled as he headed down the hall.

He stopped at the door to the room. Gil was with her, blood was covering them both. Grissom glanced up and saw Jim. Glancing back at Catherine, he released her hand that he was holding and walked over. "The perp ran into her with his car…" Gil told Jim.

"Damn," Jim responded. "How bad?"

"Don't know yet. Lots of blood loss but the doctor hasn't been in yet. Nick went to get Lily and Lindsey. It could…" He swallowed hard. "They need to be here in case…"

Suddenly Jim was sick inside. His stomach pushed against his heart as bile rose in his throat. "That bad?"

"Maybe…I hope not."

"Yeah," Jim agreed as he looked past Gil to Catherine. "Can I…"

"Something happened on that trip, didn't it? And after…"

Jim looked at his friend. "Yeah…I was heaven and now I'm in hell."

"Yeah…well, why don't you stay with her? Greg brought my change of clothes; I probably should clean up before Nick gets back."

"Yeah…thanks." Stepping into the room, Jim moved to her side. He took the hand that Gil had been holding. A sob escaped as he looked at her. "Baby, what happened…Oh god, Baby…you can't….please Baby, stay with me."

Her eyes fluttered and she looked at him, recognition registering in her face before unconsciousness claimed her again. With his free hand, he began stroking her hair. "I love you so much…"

Unknown to Jim, Lily and Lindsey had arrived at the door. Lindsey took in the scene and the depth of his emotions. She saw her mother's blood and realized how bad things were. They had argued constantly since she'd been so mean about Jim and now her mother might die. And it was her fault. She turned and ran down the hall. Lily was torn between Catherine and Lindsey, but decided Lindsey needed a few minutes. "Jim?" she whispered.

Jim turned. "Lily. We're waiting for the doctor. I don't know much…"

As if on cue, the doctor walked in. "Family?"

Lily looked at Jim and nodded affirmatively. "We'll wait in the hall," she told him as she beckoned Jim out. Lily went to look for Lindsey as Jim leaned against the wall opposite the door. He kept Catherine in his line of sight until a nurse pulled a curtain for privacy. For Jim, the wait was endless.

Lily returned with Lindsey who stood next to her grandmother, eyeing Jim warily. She had never seen such grief, even when her father died. _Why did I push them apart? _She wondered_. _

Just then the doctor stepped out. "I think we have the bleeding under control. She'll need surgery, but that will have to wait a few hours." Looking from Lily to Jim, he continued. "Did Ms. Willows know she was pregnant?"

Jim's eyes bored into the doctor as Lily cleared her throat. "She just found out. She was about six weeks along."

Jim stared at Lily as he quickly did the math…_the trip; it happened on the trip. _Then his mind zeroed in on the doctors words…was pregnant. "She _was_ pregnant?"

The doctor looked at Jim. "I'm sorry. She lost the baby."

Jim fell back into the wall, the doctor's words stinging. Lily reached for him but he just stared at her blankly. "She just found out, Jim. She was trying to decide how to tell you. She wasn't sure how you would take it…"

He gasped. And then he coiled into himself, his arms folding in front and he turned to the wall, leaning into it. "Catherine," he sobbed.

Lindsey started crying. She walked over to him and hesitantly put her hand on his arm. "You should go in to her. She needs you. I'm sorry I acted like I did. I just thought…I was just being selfish. But I can see now…see how much you love her. And I know she loves you. Please…go to her."

Jim's eyes were closed but he nodded. Collecting himself, he looked at her. "She loves us both…needs us both, especially now. We'll go together." Then looking at Lily, he amended himself. "We'll all go together. She needs all of us."

It was two days before Catherine shook off the anesthesia from the surgery and lifted out of the fog of the injuries. Jim was with her when she woke up. He had refused to leave, so Gil had brought him fresh clothes and spelled him long enough to clean up. As her eyes opened, the first thing she saw was his face. She thought she was dreaming.

"Hey," he said.

She smiled at him and managed a weak "hey" of her own. So he wasn't a dream; he really was there. She began to look around, wondering where they were.

"You were hurt at a scene," he began to tell her. "Gave us quite a scare but the doc says you're going to be okay."

Something in her mind wasn't connecting. There was something else. She tried but she couldn't remember and she was drifting away again anyway. But Jim was there, so she was okay.

It was the next day when it connected. She woke with a start as it flashed through her brain. Her eyes flew open and she focused on him, sitting in the chair next to her bed, watching her. A smile crept across his features as he realized she was awake.

"Jim…"

"Yeah, it's me."

"I…we…baby?"

Sadness engulfed him. "The baby didn't make it Catherine. I'm sorry."

"I…me too. Yours…"

"Yeah, would've been quite a souvenir from the trip," he smiled but it wasn't reflected in his eyes. "I wish…maybe if…I'm sorry Catherine."

She began to sob. "I'm sorry. Should have told you."

"Lily explained. But I shouldn't have…I mean, after that night…I couldn't… well, I was avoiding you. It hurt so much."

"Yeah, I miss my éclairs…"

"Catherine?" he said, stroking her cheek with his thumb.

She looked at him, into his eyes and saw love. "Mmmm?"

"When you get out… when you're better…"

"Yeah?"

"Marry me?"

Catherine was shocked. "Don't have to do that Jim. Lost the baby, remember?"

"And I almost lost you." His eyes were watery as he continued. "I love you and I need you, need you near me. Please, say yes."

"What about Lindsey? You said…"

"Lindsey wants to be the maid of honor," said Lindsey from the doorway.

Jim turned and smiled at the teen. She walked to her mother's bed and looked between the two. "I'm sorry, Mom. You were right. He's not like the others. I've seen how much he loves you and I hope you say yes."

Catherine smiled, looking from her daughter to Jim. "Then, yes." Lindsey giggled as Jim leaned down to kiss his fiancé's forehead. "Leave the arrangements to me. You concentrate on getting well."

"Yeah, and I'll help" said Lindsey. Then turning to Jim, "Did you give her the ring yet?"

"Ring?" Catherine asked.

"Ah, yeah." He reached in his pocket and pulled out a small box. "Lindsey stayed with you yesterday afternoon while I ran out for a little while." He opened the box and took out a stunning ring; a diamond set in a circle of sapphires. Slipping it on her finger, he smiled and asked again, "Catherine, will you marry me?"

"It's beautiful," she said as she looked at it. Then looking up at Jim, she smiled. "Yes, Mr. Éclair, I'll marry you."

Lindsey looked at her mother. "Mr. Éclair?"

"Someday when you are older, I'll explain it" her mother told her.

Making a face, Lindsey replied. "I don't think I want to know."

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More? Use the little button and let me know what you think.


	23. The Puppy Dog

Catherine improved each day until she was released a week later. Lindsey watched, amused as Jim attended to Catherine's every whim. He really was not like any other man that had dated her mother. Sadly, Lindsey included her father in the mix. Eddie Willows never treated Catherine with the kindness and reverence that Jim showed.

Catherine had been given a bell to summon help when she needed anything, which she rang frequently. Jim was sitting in the living room, reading the paper and Lindsey was watching TV when the bell rang once again. Lindsey giggled as she saw the change in Jim's expression. He was quick in responding and made a trip back to the kitchen, then back down the hall to Catherine's room. It was a summons that was repeated a lot whenever Jim was there. Lindsey had noticed that the bell was much quieter when Jim was at work.

A few minutes later, Jim returned to his paper. Lindsey sat, watching him and giggling. Slowly the paper was lowered and Jim looked at her over the top, a quizzical expression on his face, his eyebrows raised. "It's just that…" she said through a giggle, "you look like such a love struck puppy dog when she does that to you."

Jim contemplated her comment, shrugged, and then replied. "I guess it's because I am." He went back to his paper.

Lindsey watched another moment and then asked, "it doesn't bother you, all the bell ringing?"

The paper came down again. His expression was somber and so intense that it took her breath away. "I almost lost her, Lindsey. I'm just glad she is with us to ring that damned bell and I'll do whatever it takes for her to get better. She is my everything. And while we're on the subject…since you are part of her everything, that makes you part of mine too. I'm here for you too now, because you are a part of her."

Lindsey looked into his sincere blue eyes and suddenly felt …safe; safer than she had ever felt in her life. She had watched him with her mother and knew that he was incredibly solid and stable, a kind of man that hadn't been a part of her life before. Grandpa Sam had been close, but even he felt a little dangerous. But Jim…he was different. Somehow, knowing that he was there for her made her extremely happy. "Okay," she smiled. The bell sounded again. Lindsey began to laugh and Jim smirked. Rising from his chair, he winked at her before disappearing down the hall.

"You okay?" he asked Catherine as he entered her room.

"I'm bored," she whined from her bed. "I'm tired of this bed."

Jim smiled at her as he sat on the edge of the bed, next to her. "You know the doc said you should only get up for a few minutes at a time. We could get you up for your stroll around the room," he suggested.

"Yeah, let's do that," she said as she threw the covers off.

Jim supported her as she stood and then she held his arm as they walked around the room. After two trips, he paused by the bed but she shook her head. "One more time."

They made one more trip and then he insisted she lie down. He could feel her weakening. Once she was settled and covered again, he sat beside her. "Better?"

"Not really," she pouted.

"Tell you what, next time instead of three trips around the room, we'll walk you out to the sofa. You can stretch out there for a couple of hours and then back to bed you go."

"Oh, I like the sound of that," she said in a happier tone. "You and Lindsey doing okay?"

"Yeah. She was laughing at me earlier."

"Laughing at you?"

"Yeah…seems I look like a love struck puppy dog these days."

"She said that to you?"

He grinned. "I don't mind…it's true. I feel like a love struck puppy dog."

Her hand went to his face, cupping his cheek. "I love you. I'm glad you are my love struck puppy dog."

His hand covered hers and he moved it to his mouth, kissing her palm. "Always," he told her.

She pulled her hand back into her lap and her expression turned sad. Jim tilted his head, a small frown creasing his forehead. He waited for her to tell him what was bothering her.

"Jim…" she began. Her eyes dropped and staring at the sheets, she continued, "I'm sorry."

His frown deepened. "Sorry? You got nothing to be sorry about, honey."

Catherine smoothed the sheet and then clutched it in her hands. "I lost…our baby," she managed before tears began flowing down her cheeks. She looked up but couldn't quite look at Jim in the face.

Jaw clenched and fighting back tears in his own eyes, Jim reached over to hold one of her hands. "You still have nothing to be sorry for. You didn't even know and there wasn't anything you could have done anyway. Besides, the doc said that at our ages, there probably would have been complications…and the baby probably wouldn't have made it full term anyway."

Catherine looked to his face tentatively. He had hidden his hurt and sorrow since the hospital but it was showing now. "I know you would have loved it with all your heart." She saw the heartbreak that he felt.

His dark eyes gazed into her lighter ones. His free hand rubbed his neck as he often did when thinking or frustrated but his eyes never left hers. "Baby, of course I would have loved it will all my heart; it would have been yours….ours; a product of all that we feel, all that we are. And it would have been beautiful like its mother. But there's a selfish part of me that doesn't want to share you. Besides, I'm told old to start over with a baby."

Catherine wasn't convinced; Jim loved kids. She'd seen it countless times when they worked cases. He enjoyed spending time with them and was always so tender. He could walk out of the roughest situation and immediately turn to putty as he talked to a child. He would have spoiled their baby and been a doting father. She wondered how things had gotten so bad with Ellie and tried to picture Jim as a younger man, parenting the girl. She smiled as she contemplated the role he might have in Lindsey's life. As her step father, he would be a better father than Eddie had been.

"There's a part of me that's selfish too," she said. "That baby was a part of us and I …" Her words were muffled as he took her in his arms and held her to him.

Caressing her back, he told her over and over that it was okay, things would be okay. Jim had feared her reaction to losing the baby. Years ago she had confided in him that she had wanted more than just one child, but things had gotten so bad between Eddie and her that she decided more kids weren't a good idea. Then she'd left Eddie and had a series of relationships but none had become anything, so Lindsey remained an only child. Ellie had been an only child for similar reasons but Jim had given up the idea of him having more kids a long time ago After all, he was no good at relationships; as a husband or as a parent. Besides, Ellie wasn't his, biologically anyway. That Nancy had gotten pregnant in a relationship with someone else and never by Jim had convinced him that he didn't have what it took.

The thought that Catherine had, even for a little while carried his baby…_his_ baby, awed him. But he was enough of a realist to know that the odds were against the whole thing; the baby making it to term and being born healthy, him being a good father and a good husband at the same time, Catherine forgiving him when he screwed up. He could see himself repeating his past mistakes; repeating the cycle.

His mind flashed back to the PD in LA when the cold reality of Ellie's existence had slapped him in the face. He had told her that she had allowed herself to become plumbing. He'd also told her he was trying, doing the best he could. That was still true. Jim would do his best for Catherine; he just hoped his best would be good enough. Catherine deserved the best of him and more. He still had difficulty accepting that she loved and wanted him; it was his wildest fantasy come true. The cynical side of Jim Brass accepted that it was inevitable that his happiness would be clouded by heartbreak for both of them.

That Catherine was hurt by the destruction that seemed to surround him scared Jim. So he held her, afraid to let her go; afraid that one day she would look at him and tell him she couldn't take it anymore, afraid that one day she would turn away from him and he would be shattered. "I love you," he told her. "You're all that I need…everything to me. No more 'sorry.' You have nothing to feel sorry about. We lost something special, Baby; but it wasn't anything you did. It just happened. I still have you; we have each other. That's enough, more than enough for me." Catherine continued to cry and he continued to hold her, his own tears mingling with hers.

Lindsey went to check on things. She knew Jim was going without much sleep and thought maybe he had fallen asleep. She stood in the doorway of her mother's bedroom, witnessing the scene. Jim was holding her mother, her hands clinging to him desperately as she cried. Lindsey saw that Jim was crying too. Lindsey heard what he said and watching the two of them, tears formed in Lindsey's eyes also. Once again she felt terrible that she had come between them. Watching her mother and Jim, she knew that they truly belonged together. Quietly she walked back down the hall to the living room. They were good together; right now, she was the last thing they needed.

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Is the little button still there? Use it and let me know what you think;-)


	24. Nerves

Jim Brass looked in the mirror and straightened his tie one last time. He was so nervous that his hands shook. His eye caught movement behind him and he watched in the mirror as Gil Grissom came into view. Smiling, Gil asked if he was ready. Jim sighed, took one last look in the mirror, and nodded. Staring at his reflection, he wondered once again what Catherine saw in him. He was getting older, his hair thinning, his stomach a little paunchier each year, and besides, he had always been short and not the handsomest guy in the room.

His little voices went to work to boost him. _Are you kidding? You're reasonably smart, funny and somebody she can trust. And she loves your eyes. She's told you how many times how much she loves your eyes?_

_Yeah, and she calls you Mr. Éclair, remember? We know what that's all about," _his other little voice chimed in._ Seems she finds you pretty satisfying in the sack, _the voice chortled.

It wasn't often that his inner self voiced agreement, so Jim decided to go with it. Puffed up by his self assessment, he turned to walk with his friend to the car; Gil was driving. Jim was too nervous, last thing he wanted was an accident on his way to his wedding.

Catherine had continued to recover and after another week of bed rest was given the green light by the doctor to begin to resume a normal life, within reason of course. A week after that, she began prodding Jim about setting a date. Jim was fine with that and now, two months later, the day had arrived.

"You okay?" Gil startled him out of his thoughts.

"Yeah, fine…" he answered nervously.

"Right," smiled Gil. "You know, you two surprised everyone with your little secret. I kind of suspected after the trip but no one else did. And then when it became so obvious after Catherine was hurt…Nick's still in disbelief. He and Cath have a bond, you know. I think she was there for him a few times when he needed a sister. And Greg, well…he's always flirted with her."

"Sanders flirts with every woman." Jim observed.

"Not really. Although he did with Sara too. There for awhile I thought maybe they would…but it never happened."

"Go get her, Gil."

"She doesn't want me to, Jim. She's made that clear. Some days it is all I can do to not follow her, but she needs her independence, needs time to work some things out."

"She's had almost a year. Time's up. Look, everything Catherine went through…everything we went through should tell ya, you don't know how much time ya got; make good use of it, Gil. Ignore her telling you to stay away. Go for it. Jump in the deep end with both feet and eyes wide open."

"Maybe…" was all Gil would say.

Catherine had insisted on being married by a minister. She didn't want the typical Vegas wedding at one of the hundreds of wedding chapels. She said it felt cheap to her and she wanted something that reflected their commitment…something that felt like it would last. Although Jim hadn't ever been much of a church goer, he saw her point and agreed. They found a small chapel just outside the city that was attached to a church. The minister performed weddings in the chapel. Couples were required to do some pre-marital counseling and Jim and Catherine had followed procedure. Actually Jim was glad they had. It gave them a chance to talk about some of their concerns in a neutral setting with a third party to help the discussions along. Both had failed in previous marriages and brought a lot of baggage to the discussion. But with the minister's help, they'd come to understand more about themselves and their expectations in this union. As the counseling had continued, Jim had become more confident that this time he would do better.

Doc Robbins was giving Catherine away and Lindsey was standing up with her mother. Gil would be Jim's Best Man. Nick and Greg would be there along with several of Jim's associates at the PD. Gil had told Sara about it but she had declined an invitation. Lily was there, of course. Several of the lab rats also attended along with David and his bride. All together, about twenty people had gathered to witness the union of Catherine Willows and Jim Brass.

When they arrived at the chapel, Jim wanted to see Catherine, but Lily and Lindsey barred the door. "Bad luck," they told him.

"Right," he said, his fingers fidgeting as he walked away. Nick spotted him and pulled him down the little hall to the other side of the building. "Where's Gris?" he asked.

"Don't know, Jim answered, glancing back in Catherine's direction. She was just behind that wooden door but right now, he felt like she was miles away. Butterflies were fluttering all around his insides as his nervousness grew. Just then Greg showed up, smiling. "I just saw the bride," he said as he fluttered his eyebrows. "You lucky devil…"

Jim smiled distractedly. "Yeah…I am." Gil walked up and told them it was time. He and Jim walked to the front of the small chapel and stood, waiting for the music to begin.

Everything after that was a haze for Jim. Once the music started she appeared at the back of the church, wearing a tan dress. He would never remember the details of the dress though; all he saw was her face. She was radiant…and she was walking towards him. Suddenly he wasn't nervous anymore, everything felt right; this was the most "right" thing he had ever done in his life. His eyes never left her through the ceremony. He knew he should look at the minister but he couldn't take his eyes off of her. She would look at him and then back at the minster, and then back at him with a smile. Jim was aware of the minster's voice and even managed to repeat the vows when it was time and say his I do. But his eyes and his thoughts were on her; a fact that was not lost on the well-wishers. Everyone in the room saw how much Jim was in love and how much love was being returned to him and they smiled, pleased that at last he had found happiness.

They had reserved a room at a restaurant near the chapel and everyone joined in the celebration after the ceremony. A sea of familiar faces swarmed around them but Jim was really only aware of one, Catherine…his Catherine. "Jim, you keep looking at me…is everything alright?" She whispered into his ear. "My eyelashes aren't hanging at funny angles or anything, are they?"

He knew he must look all sappy and lovestruck but he didn't care. He smiled at her, something he couldn't seem to stop doing. "You're beautiful. That's why I keep looking," he shrugged.

Smiling at him, she leaned over to kiss him. He expected a 'public' kiss, kind of chaste and simple. What he got was a heart thumping, blood rushing, and breath taking kind of kiss that stirred urges in him that his caveman ancestors would have recognized. By the time she was finished with the kiss, he wanted to take her right there in the middle of the room. His more civilized self won the battle however, and he managed to simply smile and whisper a promise to her that she would finish what she started later, in their hotel room.

"You bet I will," she teased him with dancing eyes.

Witnesses to the kiss began to chuckle and a few wolf whistles were heard. Then applause began and someone called out, "do it again!" Suddenly the room had too many people in it and Jim wanted out. He looked around wishing everyone would go away. After almost another two hours, people began to leave and eventually Jim and Catherine were left alone except for Gil, who had remained, as had Nick. Gil would drive them to the hotel, leaving the car with them and Nick would give Gil a lift home. _Just a few more minutes, _Jim kept telling himself. _Hang in there for just a little while longer…_

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Pardon all the fluff. I promise there will be more action soon. But we have to have happy, right?


	25. Perfect

By the time they made it to their room, Jim's breathing was ragged and he could hear his heart in his ears. _What's the big deal? _He asked himself_. After all, you have been with her before…amazingly with her. _But after her stay in the hospital and the recovery at home, they hadn't slept together, well…not like _that _anyway. So Jim was nervous, in some ways more nervous than he'd been in New York. _Who you kiddin'? You're a basket case; certifiable. God, she's just so beautiful and now she belongs to you…and you belong to her. You can't screw this up, Brass; she's too special for you to go all nutty on her. You gotta keep your self together. Geez, how'd you get so lucky?_

He put their bags down and turned, smiling at her shyly. Her eyes were fixed on him, wide open and hungry. Unexpectedly, Jim felt like the main course of a five course meal. But then to him she looked like dessert, so he decided that all was fair. She moved towards him, which he thought was a good thing since he seemed to be frozen in his place. "Jim?" Her eyes glittered and she was wearing a sensuous smirk, teasing him with her look.

He gave her an appreciative look, eyeing her from head to toe, lingering on her most interesting parts before returning his gaze to her eyes. "Catherine?" he smiled wickedly.

Their night of love making, the first night of them as one, truly one, was the most exquisite night of his life; everything was perfect, Jim thought as he lay next to her in the early morning. He had slept for a few hours but he was too happy, too wired to sleep for long. So here he was, his arms wrapped around the most incredible woman he'd ever known, watching her sleep. Her features were so peaceful and he thought he detected a faint smile on her lips as she slumbered. Warmth travelled through his body as he realized that he was the reason for her little smile. He made her happy. Pressure built behind his eyes as that realization settled one him. He, Jim Brass…super screw up in every relationship he'd ever had before, made Catherine happy.

He swallowed hard and squeezed her a little closer to him as the enormity of his emotions engulfed him. Determination settled over him as he vowed once again that he would make it work, he'd do whatever he had to for things to work with them. "God Baby, I love you so much," he whispered. "Mmmm," she moaned back at him, snuggling into his body even more while still sleeping. Jim contemplated his entire future like this, her in his arms and him being so incredibly happy; a small gasp escaped as it all overwhelmed him.

The dim rays of dawn blossomed into the full light of day as Jim lay there with his bride, his heart blossoming with the sunlight. Finally she began to stir and turned, looking into his eyes. She settled back comfortably, entranced by his open, honest expression of adoration. She loved being adored, worshipped even, as he had called out her name in conjunction with several deities during the night. She giggled at the memory and was met by his questioning smirk. "Just remembering the night," she explained. "You make me feel as silly as a school girl."

A wry grin grew at the corners of his mouth but his eyes revealed the most. Adoration mixed with determination, followed by fire which then blended into desire. Her body warmed as she realized he wanted her ….again. Jim had alluded several times to the idea that his age might limit his capabilities in that department but so far, she was struggling to keep up with him. And he was such a delightful lover, always making sure her needs were met and following her desires before unleashing his own. She'd never been with such a considerate man, one who put her first so easily, as if it were part of his nature. But of course, it was part of Jim's nature. That he needed her was obvious but the thing that surprised Catherine was that part of his need was to satisfy her. _Willows…no, Brass…_she smiled inwardly,_ you're one lucky bitch, you know that? And to think how long you overlooked this man…_

After much discussion, they had decided on a Honeymoon weekend for now. Jim didn't want Catherine to overdo things so soon. She had acquiesced, making him promise to take her back to New York for their First Anniversary. He had promised and added that they would go back every year for their anniversary until they were too old and feeble to make the trip. She had laughed at him, "then book us for the next fifty years," she had retorted.

After a shower and a quick breakfast, they drove out to Lake Meade where he had rented a cabin for the weekend. They had agreed that it would be the perfect place; quiet, secluded, their own little world. Jim brought their bags in while Catherine emptied the grocery bags they had picked up along the way. She smiled as she realized Jim had snuck a bottle of wine in with the food. She heard his coming and going with the bags, but wondered why he was making so many trips. _There were only three bags,_ she thought.

As she headed out to the porch she was met by Jim, who was coming around the corner. He smiled diffidently as he held out a bunch of wildflowers. "I saw these and …well, they reminded me of you," he said quietly.

"They are beautiful," she told him as she looked into his animated eyes. She took them from him but her gaze remained on him. _He really does have such beautiful eyes…_"I love the way your eyes tell me what you are thinking," she told him.

"Oh," he said, startled. "I thought I was better at covering my thoughts than that. Sorta need to do that when I'm interrogating suspects…"

"Well mister, no need to use your interrogation techniques on me. I'll succumb to you anytime," she said coyly.

He stepped closer to her. "Succumb? Oh I like the way that sounds…" He was being the tease now. Leaning into her, he kissed her. As they parted, his forehead touched hers and he stayed there, breathing in her essence. Both were content in that moment, happy to be standing there on the front porch of the little cabin, their breaths mingling, electricity charging them both. Finally he whispered, "how about we go for a walk? I saw a trail on the other side." Putting the flowers down on the porch, she reached for his hand and they headed to the trail.

After a few minutes, they came to an open area where they could see the lake and the mountains. Stopping to look at the scenery, Catherine wrapped her arms around Jim's arm and laid her head on his shoulder. "It's so beautiful," she commented wistfully.

Jim looked at her. "You're beautiful," he said simply.

Catherine lifted her head and stared at him. Then looking around, she pulled him closer. "Make love to me."

His eyes widened. "You serious? Here?"

She licked her lips seductively and nodded. "Now." She began sliding down, tugging on him to follow.

"Ah….wait…" He quickly unbuttoned his shirt and spread it on the ground. "It's not much but maybe it'll be some protection for you," he said sheepishly. Once again she was struck by how thoughtful he could be.

Jim tried to set a slower pace but Catherine was having none of it. She took charge of this session and before he knew what had happened, his name was echoing through the wild and relief was flooding them both. He was just coming back down to earth when they heard the distinct sound of a rattle somewhere nearby. Jim froze as he surveyed the ground around them. His eyes locked on the intruder and quietly he told Catherine what to do. Then grabbing her hand, he said "Now!" and pulling her away, he grabbed the shirt from the ground and threw it at the snake. The snake struck at the shirt, giving them a chance to get away. Be careful," he told Catherine as they made their way back along the trail. "He might have relatives…"

Finally they made it back to the cabin. Once inside, Catherine turned to hug Jim but stopped short. "Uh oh…"

"What?" he asked.

"Your skin…" Jim looked down at his chest. "No wonder I am itching and burning," he said as he surveyed his bright red skin. "Too much exposure…"

"Go hit the shower," Catherine told him. "Cool water to get some of the heat out. Then I think I have some lotion that should help."

Jim did as he was told and when he came out, Catherine slathered lotion all over his back and chest. As he watched her hands on him, Jim smiled. "This I like," he told her.

Catherine's giggle was naughty as she finished rubbing in the lotion. "I'll finish you off later," she said. "Right now though, I'm starving."

Jim looked at her single-mindedly. "Me too," he said as his eyes perused her body.

Catherine laughed. "Down boy. I meant for food."

"Oh," he said impishly. "Well, yeah…I could use a little of that too."

Jim helped Catherine with the kitchen chores and then declared it was time for bed. Catherine laughed at him. "Not before I have a nice soak in the tub," she declared. She headed for the bathroom, suspicious of the twinkle in his eyes. Just as she settled in, her head resting against the back of the tub, she felt him climbing in with her. Her eyes grew wide. "This isn't big enough for two," she told him.

Easing his way down, his legs finding room between her legs and the side of the tub, he smirked. "Yes there is…" Jim sat facing her, their legs entwined. Reaching over the edge he produced two glasses of wine and handed her one. "Thought we should celebrate," he told her.

She looked at him quizzically. "What are we celebrating?"

"Our anniversary."

Catherine had to smile. He looked so pleased with himself as he sat across from her. "Anniversary?"

"Yeah, we've been married a whole day…twenty four hours. Cause for celebration, don't you think?"

"Are we going to do this every night?"

"We might," his gravelly voice whispered as his hand began to stroke her leg.

"Don't you think that's a bit extreme, Jim? Celebrating every day as an anniversary, I mean."

His eyes, which had been focused on his fingers rubbing her leg, slowly looked up to her face. The love that showed in his sparkling orbs astonished her. "Every minute that I am with you is a reason for me to celebrate," he told her simply. "I love you, Mrs. Brass."

Catherine gasped. "What's wrong?" he asked her.

"Nothing. It's just that no one's called me that until now."

"So….how does it sound to you?"

"It sounds like…heaven."

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Soooo, whacha think? Still good. Time to throw in the towel? I have more if you want it.


	26. Big Daddy

Once they returned from their honeymoon, Jim and Catherine were busy moving him into her house and rearranging their lives, becoming less and less two individuals and becoming more and more one unit. Jim had been apprehensive at first about moving into the house that Catherine had shared with her first husband, but Catherine assured him that the house was never Eddie's. After a few weeks, he began putting his own touches on the place, beginning with a backyard grill.

He had also worried about Lindsey's reaction to all of the changes. But she assured him that staying in the house that she had grown up in helped her with all of the other adjustments. She wouldn't admit it to either Jim or her mother, but she liked having him there. He didn't feel like a father to her yet, but she was accepting him more and more as family.

For his part, Jim was as thoughtful of Lindsey as he was of Catherine. As he went about his days…or nights, he would spot something that reminded him of her; little trinkets, a book she might enjoy, a CD, once even a teddy bear. Once or twice a week he would come through the door, looking for her with his latest find. Sometimes Lindsey loved what he had brought and sometimes he was totally off with his choice, but she understood the meaning behind the gifts; he was thinking about her. It made her feel special in a way she hadn't felt since her father had died and she was growing to love him for it.

About three months after the wedding, Jim sat in the kitchen reading his paper as Lindsey was telling Catherine about a new boy at school. Jim listened and frowned as he followed the conversation. He was not happy two days later when Lindsey came home and told her mother that the boy, Josh Erikson, had asked her out. The date was scheduled for Friday night. Jim tried to ask Catherine about it. "You let her date?"

"Jim, she's fifteen. Yes, I let her date. But there will be a curfew and some other rules that she already knows about."

"But…he's a boy…Believe it or not I remember what it was like in high school; where my head was…"

"Which one?" she asked him in jest.

Jim frowned at her. "The wrong one…Catherine, I don't like this boy."

She laughed. "You don't even know him…"

Jim got called to a scene on the next shift and Grissom was the CSI on the scene. "Hey Gil," he started with his friend.

Gil looked quizzically at him over the DB.

"What are you doing Friday night?"

"You asking me on a date, Jim? Honeymoon over already?"

"No, no….but Lindsey's going on a date and I need backup."

"Back up?"

Jim explained what he needed. Gil looked at him warily. "Catherine's going to be angry," he warned Jim.

"I'll take all the blame, if that's what's worrying you. But I need you to do this for me…"

Gil sighed. "Okay, I'll be there."

Friday night came. Jim had told Catherine that Gil was stopping by for a drink. He showed up at the appointed time and had Nick and Greg with him; a bonus in Jim's mind.

They all sat in the living room chatting until about five minutes before Josh was supposed to show up. Then the conversation changed. "So Greg, I hear you are qualifying for weapons next week?" Jim began.

"Ah, yeah," the young CSI replied, startled.

Gil joined in. "What will you be firing, Greg?"

"Uh, I don't know. I've been practicing with a thirty-eight."

"Thirty eight?" Nick asked incredulously. "Naw man, you want a Glock."

"Is that what you fire?"

"Yeah. Hang on, I'll be right back." Nick went to his truck to retrieve his weapon. Once he was back, he showed it to Greg.

"It seems heavy," Greg said.

"Here," said Gil as he pulled out his pistol. "Hold mine. Its pretty light weight."

Greg put Nick's down on the table and picked up Gil's. Then looking across at Jim, he asked. "What do you fire?"

Jim went to his safe and got his weapon, handing it to Greg. Just then the doorbell rang.

Catherine came out of Lindsey's room, heading to the door. Her stride shortened and she began moving in slow motion as she took in the scene in her living room. Jim, Gil, Nick and Greg all sat around the coffee table with various pistols on display. Jim had even produced hers to show to Greg. Her mouth fell open as she realized what was going on.

She stopped to consider saying something but then shrugged her shoulders and answered the door. Josh introduced himself and Catherine showed him in, walking him into the living room and introducing him to the men.

Four sets of stony eyes stared at the boy, who suddenly felt weak in the knees. Jim rose and walked over to him as Catherine headed to Lindsey's room to tell her that her date was here and she's better get ready fast. "So, you're Josh?" Jim said as he held out his hand. "I'm Jim Brass, Lindsey's step father."

"Ah yes, Mr. Brass. Pleased to meet you."

Nick cleared his throat. "That's Captain Brass, kid."

Greg had his back to Josh and smirked as Nick joined in the fun. Jim turned and indicated Gil. "That's Gil Grissom. He's Lindsey's honorary uncle, as are Nick and Greg. But Gil's been there the longest for her." On cue, Gil put his weapon down on the table and walked over to shake the boy's hand. "Pleased to meet you, Josh."

"Likewise, sir."

Gil held Josh's hand a little too long. "It's nice to feel warm flesh," he said. "Most of the boys I meet that are your age are lying on a slab at the morgue."

"You work at the morgue?" Josh's eyes grew huge.

"Sometimes. I'm a forensic scientist."

"Oh," replied Josh.

"Yeah, the cool thing about being CSIs," chimed in Greg, "is that you can commit murder and know all the things to do to get away with it."

"You can?" said Josh.

"They think they can," said Jim. "And they are the best."

"So you're not a CSI?" Josh asked Jim.

"No, he's a Captain of Detectives for the LVPD," said Nick. "A real hero….killed lots of bad guys."

Josh swallowed. "Killed them? I didn't think…"

"Oh, Jim usually doesn't _mean_ to kill them…he just gets a little carried away sometimes," Gil added.

"Yeah, what was the last one Jim?" Greg asked. "Wasn't he that guy you beat up in interrogation?"

"Ah…yeah, I think so. I couldn't let him hurt Gil. I mean, nobody gets away with hurting _my people_," Jim intoned.

Catherine stood in the hall for most of the conversation and was having difficulty not laughing. The clincher came when Greg, sitting in his chair, balancing two weapons in his hands added, "Yeah, and the beauty of it is, we know how to manipulate the evidence. Nobody has ever suspected…"

Just then Lindsey entered the scene. She had overheard the last little bit but was confused. "What are you guys talking about?"

"Nothing really," Jim told her. "Josh here was just telling us how he would have you home by midnight, _unharmed._" His steely blue eyes bore into Josh, who gulped.

"Yeah," he said. "Just the usual, you know….midnight, call if there's a problem…."

Jim smiled and nodded as did the others. Josh and Lindsey walked to the door, Josh being very careful not to touch her inappropriately. Lindsey looked back at the guys and sighing, rolled her eyes before walking out the door. Catherine walked into the living room laughing. "All right guys, you've done enough damage for one night. I'm sure Jim appreciates the help but you need to leave so I can have a little chat with him."

"Chat about what?" Greg asked.

"Not scaring off Lindsey's dates," Catherine said, still chuckling. "She'll be lucky if that boy shakes her hand good night."

"I thought that was the point," stated Gil, his eyebrows furrowing but his eyes giving away his amusement.

"Alright…enough, already." Catherine handed Gil and Nick their weapons and walked the group to the door. Once they'd all left, she turned to her husband. "What was that?"

He shrugged sheepishly. "I just didn't want him to ….ah get any ideas."

"Ideas? What kind of ideas?"

A gleam twinkled in Jim's eyes. "Come over here and I'll show you."

An hour later, Catherine lay in Jim's arms. "Yeah, I see what you mean. Wouldn't want Josh thinking _those_ thoughts about my daughter," she chuckled.

Jim nuzzled her neck. "Told you I knew what the guy was thinking…"

"Now why did you think Josh would think those things in relation to Lindsey?"

"Lindsey's a lot like you….and I know what _you_ do to _me_," he replied.

They heard Lindsey come in at12.03. Jim knew the time because he checked the clock. He could also tell she was upset; she slammed doors as she made her way through the house. He rolled over, snuggled back into Catherine and went back to sleep, satisfied that the boy had gotten his message.

The next morning, Catherine was still laughing at Jim. Just wait 'til Lindsey comes down for breakfast," she warned him. "She has my temper, plus all those teenage hormones mixed in."

They were in the kitchen, Jim sipping his coffee and Catherine making a frittata when Lindsey appeared. "Good morning, Mom," she said to Catherine. Then she turned and glared at Jim.

"Good morning, Lindsey," he smiled at her. She glowered back at him and then sat at the counter in a huff. "How was your date?" he asked.

"Humph…." She fumed.

"That good, huh?" he chuckled.

Lindsey bolted out of the room. Catherine started to follow her but Jim held up his hand. "It's me she's mad at, let me take the heat. I'll go talk to her." He followed her to her room and tapping on the door, he walked inside.

She was sitting on her bed, tears trickling down her face.

"Lindsey…honey, I'm sorry. I guess I took things too far with Josh."

"You think?" she yelled at him. "He would even hold my hand all night. You scared him so bad I don't think he'll ever ask me out again. And worse, he'll tell all the others about it and none of them will ask me out either."

Jim paused and thought for a moment. He really liked the thought that none of the boys would ask her out. But as he looked at her, his stomach began to churn. He needed to fix this. "I really am sorry, although I'm glad he understood to keep his hands off of you. Lindsey, I know I seem really old to you, but I do remember what it was like as a high school teenager and I also remember what went through my head as a teenaged boy. I don't want Josh or any boy thinking those thoughts about you and I especially don't want them acting on those thoughts. You're too special…too incredible to be treated like that. No girl should be treated so cheaply, but especially not you. I just wanted Josh to understand that I won't allow it."

Lindsey looked at Jim through her teary eyes. "Is that what you did to your daughter…scare off her dates?"

Jim sighed. His mistakes with Ellie were so much more complicated than that. "I…wasn't really around much by the time Ellie started dating. I moved here before that. I did have some of my buddies from the PD send a squad car to her prom though, just to scare the guys that she was hanging with. Things between me and Ellie…they're complicated. She thinks I abandoned her and I suppose there is some truth to that. But if I had stayed, it would have been worse, I think. It's a long story, but my life was pretty messed up back in Jersey. I needed a fresh start so I moved here. Ellie kept getting into trouble after that. I tried to do what I could. I went back several times to help her mother with some of the situations. To make the story short, she's been in and out of trouble ever since. Now she's living in LA and turning tricks for a living. She shouldn't have ended up that way, she was too sweet, too unique to waste her life like that. Every time the phone rings, I wonder if it's LAPD calling to tell me that my little girl is dead. I don't want that kind of life for you; I don't want that kind of worry for your mother. So I'm sorry that I overdid it with Josh, but understand…I'm not going to let some little pimply face teenaged boy ruin your life."

Lindsey stared at Jim the tears still running down her cheeks. "You…your daughter is a hooker?"

"Yeah honey, she is. And it kills me a little every time I think about it."

Lindsey thought Jim looked very sad. But he looked determined too. She thought about what he had told her and choked back her tears. And then she realized that he hadn't wanted to tell her about Ellie. But he had, because he cared about her and wanted to explain why he acted the way he did. He didn't want her to end up like his daughter; he was afraid for her. Until then she had the idea that he'd only put up with her because of her mother but it hit her then that he really did care about her, Lindsey Willows. He loved her too…like a daughter. "A…at school," she sniffled, "when all the kids are talking….when they are talking about their families….it makes me sad. They talk about their Dads and it makes me realize what I have missed."

"Yeah honey. I know. I won't pretend that I ever liked him much, but your Dad did love you. He at least got that part of his life right. I know you miss him."

"Yeah…well, not so much. Sometimes it's even hard to remember him. And when the others talk…" she paused. Then she looked up at him. 'Would you….mind if ….well, when they are talking about their families…could I talk about you like _you_ are my dad?"

Jim swallowed. He hadn't expected that. "Lindsey, it'd make me very happy and proud if you were to think of me that way…but as your second Dad. Eddie will always be your first one."

"Yeah… but I mean, I don't have to go into all of that, do I? I can just say you're my dad now?"

"I think that would be okay. But you need to check with your mother first, okay?"

"Yeah…and, no more scaring off boys with your gun, okay?"

Jim smiled. "I'll try to learn to be more subtle, I promise. But you have to understand, I'm not going to let you go out with guys that aren't worthy of you."

Lindsey smiled. "Deal."

Jim was surprised when she all but leapt into his arms. But the hug she gave him sealed his commitment to her; after all, he was her dad.

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Let me know what you think:-)


	27. Saturday Night

Jim surprised Lindsey and Catherine both later in the day by suggesting that Lindsey invite Josh over for dinner on Saturday night. "Your Mom and I both have the night off. And since you seem to really like this guy, we should get to know him. It'll give us a chance to do that…know him better. Who knows I might even like him," he smirked. "Although, he'll never be good enough for you," he said with a wink.

Lindsey giggled and looked at her Mom, who smiled and nodded encouragingly. After Lindsey bounced out of the room, Catherine smiled at her husband. "You need a time out."

Jim looked at her questionably. "Time-out?"

She took his hand and led him to their bedroom. As he realized her meaning, he grinned. "Time out used to be about sitting alone in a corner." Catherine smiled salaciously at him and he chuckled. "Oh, I like your concept of 'time-out…."

Josh came to dinner on Saturday night. Jim grilled some steaks and Lindsey and Catherine prepared salad and a potato casserole to go with the meat. As the evening progressed, Jim found that he did, indeed, like Josh. He apologized to the kid for scaring him with all the guns the previous week, explaining that they were trying to help Sanders decide on which weapon to carry. "They work Graveyard and deal with dead bodies all the time, so sometimes they sound a little strange."

Josh seemed to accept his explanation so Jim was pleased with himself for straightening out the mess. He was helping Catherine with clean up when he told her that he apologized. "So, now….do I get to go to time-out," he asked.

Catherine winked at him. "Oh you most certainly do have to spend some time there…a lot of time."

Jim was just about to kiss her when the phone rang. It was PD calling him in. After hanging up, he found Catherine, who had gone back to the patio to sit with Lindsey and Josh. She knew when she saw his face that he had been called in.

"Babe, I'm sorry. There's a hostage situation with one fatality already and they want me there."

Catherine gasped. "Hostages?" she asked weakly.

"Yeah…but I won't be the negotiator this time, there's already one in place. I won't go in the room alone with the perp." Jim knew why she was so upset. The last time he'd handled a hostage situation, he almost died.

"Jim, promise me….nothing heroic, okay."

Jim led her away from the kids. "Babe, you got nothing to worry about. They just need some rank on the scene and the Under-sheriff is at some big money raiser, so my name was next on the list. I'll be careful, I promise."

Catherine hugged him, clinging to his arm until he finally pried himself away. She stood in the doorway as he threw on his jacket and headed out. Watching him drive away, a tear slid down her face. Her gut told her this was going to be a bad night.

When Jim came out to tell Catherine that he had to go to work, both kids realized how upset Catherine was. Lindsey explained to Josh why a hostage case disturbed Catherine so much. "He almost died," she explained. "Mom said he flat-lined a couple of times before they could get him stabilized."

"Wow…really?" Josh responded. "Flat-lined? I wonder if he remembers anything?"

"Mom says he remembers getting shot but not much after until he woke up in the hospital and they were all there. But he doesn't talk about it. She says he thinks it was one of the dumbest things he ever did as a cop. He saved a woman's life and got a commendation for it but he thinks he was being stupid. I don't get it…"

"Yeah," Josh agreed. "Me either…"

Catherine overheard the end of the conversation and remembered that time. She had stood and watched with Gil…and Ellie, as the doctor and nurses brought Jim back to life, shocking him with the paddles. It had been difficult to take then; it would be impossible for her to handle it now.

Jim arrived at the scene and found chaos. "What we got?" he asked Lieutenant Suarez, the ranking officer.

"A mess," was the response. "We got a call about a domestic disturbance. The unit that responded called for back-up. The husband went berserk; started shooting…a round hit his wife. One of our guys went down. Now the bastard is locked up inside the house with a kid, threatening to shoot anybody that comes near the place and then he says he'll shoot the kid."

"His kid?" Jim asked, incredulously.

"Ah…no. According to neighbors the kid is hers from a previous relationship. No one knows who the father is."

"How old?"

"Six year old boy. His name is Andrew…goes by Drew."

"Okay, so where are we now…how we set up?"

"I got men around the perimeter, a sniper set on the roof across the street. The only look into the house is through the front window. "

"Who's doing the talking?"

"Jensen. He's set up in the van…has a tap directly into the house."

"Okay…okay," Jim said as he surveyed the area, taking in what Suarez was telling him. The he headed for the van and Jensen. He tapped on the doors and then climbed in. "Jensen…where are we?"

"I've established a connection with him but he's not talking much. Just keeps ranting about how she made him do it."

"What about the boy?"

"He says he'll kill the boy if anyone makes a move toward him. He's pretty agitated; I'm trying to let him settle down a little before I start pushing."

"I want that boy out there. Do what it takes…understand?"

"Gotcha Captain."

Josh had left and Catherine was getting ready for bed when the phone rang.

"Hey Baby, it's me," Jim's voice sounded tired.

"Hey you…you okay?"

"Yeah…the bastard shot his wife and took out one of our guys. He's holding a six year old boy hostage. Jensen is negotiating." He heard her sigh of relief. "I promised you Babe, I'm being careful."

"Thank you. I…" Catherine realized that she was adding pressure by being anxious. "Do what you need to do Jim, just …"

"Baby, all I want is for this to be over so I can come home and crawl into bed and hold you."

"Yeah…me too," she relaxed. "I love the feel of your arms around me."

"Look Babe, I just wanted to check in before you went to bed. Just wanted to say "I love you." His voice was quiet…gentle.

"I love you too. And I'll be here when you get home."

"Can't wait…"

"Hmmm, keep your mind on the job Jim."

"Yeah. But after…"

"I'll be waiting."

Jim closed his phone and turned his attention back to the scene. It had been a frustrating few hours. Jensen wasn't making much progress and the perp, Stan Simpson, was getting edgier. The hairs on the back of Jim's neck began to crawl. He had a bad feeling about the situation.

An hour later they were still waiting. Simpson was talking to Jensen less. Things were deteriorating. He was talking with Jensen and Suarez when they heard the garage door opening. All eyes went in that direction. Simpson was at the wheel, the car engine running.

"If he gets out, we'll never get him…" declared Suarez.

Jim began walking towards the driveway. Simpson gunned the engine and the car rolled out. Pointing his pistol at the windshield, Jim prepared to shoot. The boy's head came into view and Jim hesitated. An officer from the other side fired, shattering the windshield but missing the perp. The car stopped momentarily as Simpson recovered and Jim saw his chance. Using the butt of his gun, he smashed the passenger window and reached in, opening the door and yanking the kid out. Jim pulled the kid close to him, using his own body to shield the kid as they fell to the ground and rolled away. Gunfire resounded as the uniformed officers opened fire. It was all over within seconds.

Jim lay on the ground, still covering the kid, his shoulder aching. Somewhere in the fall and roll, he'd hurt it. Suarez reached him first. "Stay still," he told Jim. "I've got the kid."

Jim looked down at the kid and saw huge blue eyes looking back at him, terrified. "It's okay Drew," Jim told him. "You're safe."

Drew nodded but didn't move. Jim eased himself over to let Suarez get the kid. It was then that he realized that he hadn't hurt his shoulder, he'd been hit. Blood was soaking the sleeve of his jacket. _Damn!_

"Stay still," Suarez barked at him. "Medics are on their way over." Jim nodded, feeling sick. Suarez was holding the kid, who was watching Jim. Jim tried to smile, to reassure the kid but he felt so weak that the smile faded. Just then, a uniform took the kid, who looked back over his shoulder at Jim as they walked away. It was then that Jim passed out.

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Sooooo? What are you thinking? The little button is begging for you to use it.


	28. Scared

Just a note in response to some of the reviews: Some readers have suggested that Catherine and Jim have a baby after I had them "lose" a baby in earlier chapters. I'm sticking with what Jim told Catherine, however. The odds of a couple their ages conceiving and carrying to full term a healthy baby are poor. It does happen but there are many factors against it. The character of Catherine is in her late forties, pushing fifty. Pre-menopause is certainly affecting her fertility and quality of eggs, as well as her body's ability to handle a pregnancy. Jim is pushing sixty. While I've written him as still a very robust lover, the reality is that men face their own issues at that age. Fertility is an issue as well as the quality of the sperm. Chromosomal defects increase dramatically for babies born to such couples. While I appreciate the "sweetness" of a baby born to our fantastic couple, I just don't want to go there. If I stick with the reality of the situation, it would be too depressing. And while I enjoy good fantasy, I am one who tends to keep at least one foot grounded in reality. Now, on with the story!

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Catherine slept fitfully until the phone rang. Gil asked her to open her front door. "What?" Why?" she asked drowsily.

"Please Cath, just do it."

She made her way to the door, opened it and gasped when she saw his expression. "Jim?" she cried in terror.

Gil reached over and grabbed her. "He's at the hospital, Cath. The perp shot him but it's a through and through…not life threatening. The bullet missed anything vital. But…when I heard, I thought I should be the one to tell you. He's going to be okay, Cath. Really."

Tears were streaming down her face. Lindsey had heard the commotion and appeared in the doorway from the hall. "Mom?"

"Jim's been…hurt," Catherine told her daughter. "I'm going to the hospital…"

"Me too. I'll be ready in a sec," the teen yelled over her shoulder as she ran down the hall."

Catherine looked at Gil. "You'll drive us?"

"Of course. Throw on some clothes and we'll head over."

Jim woke in the ER. His shoulder ached and his head felt like lead. A nurse was hovering, checking the IV and performing other tasks that he really didn't want to think about. He looked around and recognized no one. "Catherine?" he whispered.

The nurse turned and smiled at him. "You're back with us…"

"Catherine?" he managed again. He looked towards the door, hoping she would walk through. He couldn't explain it really, but he needed her…wanted her. Somehow he knew he'd be okay if she would just walk through that door.

The nurse finished her tasks and left as Jim drifted back into darkness. No one was aware, then, when the door opened and then quietly closed. A small body darted across the room and two small blue eyes peeked up over the edge of the gurney. Tears formed in the eyes as they remained riveted on the figure lying on the bed.

A few minutes later a commotion was heard in the hall. The small blue eyes blinked and then disappeared as the small body crawled under the bed. The door opened and Catherine charged through, Gil close behind.

She made her way to the gurney and stopped, studying Jim. Her hand went to his face, stroking his cheek lovingly. "Jim," she whispered.

His eyes fluttered open and focused on her. A small smile crept into the corners of his mouth. "Hey…"

"Don't you dare 'hey' me," Catherine snapped. "You promised me…you promised me, Jim."

"I know…sorry, Babe." Jim licked his lips. "I tried…but when I saw the kid; had to get him out."

Catherine sighed. "I know…it's who you are…part of what I love about you. It's just…you scared me Jim."

He reached for her hand, taking it in his. "Sorry…didn't mean to…love you," he said weakly.

"Just…rest, do what they tell you to do and get well. I want you home."

"Why, so you can kick my butt?"

"Yeah, that and more," she smiled.

Jim drifted back into oblivion, feeling better now that Catherine was with him. Gil stepped up from behind Catherine, putting his arm around her. "He'll be okay, Cath. It's okay."

"Yeah," she said, tears trickling out of her eyes. "This time."

"You knew when you married him…"

"I know but it doesn't make it easier," she sighed.

The door opened again and Lindsey came in. "How is he, Mom?"

"Okay, I think. The nurse said the doctor is with a more serious emergency and Jim is next on his list. They've got him hooked up to an IV and have the bleeding under control."

"What happened?"

Gil spoke up. "The suspect had the boy in his car and was headed out. An officer shot out the windshield and Jim took advantage of the distraction to open the passenger door and pull the boy out. The suspect opened fire and PD returned fire. We haven't determined whose bullet went through Jim."

"Oh my god," Catherine gasped. "Friendly fire?"

"Possibly."

Catherine looked back at Jim. "You don't think some one took advantage of the situation to retaliate for Bell, do you?"

"I doubt it, Catherine. I think everyone knows Jim would give anything to be able to take that bullet back."

Dammit Gil, if they didn't back him properly…"

"Cath, don't jump to any conclusions. Whatever ill will was hanging on was buried when Jim took that bullet from Cutler. Everyone respects Jim for doing what he did that night. And Jim doesn't need to hear your doubts. He has to work with these guys…"

Yeah, and he needs to know he can depend on them…_know_, not just believe."

Something made Jim's gurney shake. Gil's eyebrows shot up as he looked at Catherine. Together they leaned over, peering under the bed. There they spotted the boy. "Drew?" Gil asked softly.

The boy scooted further back, away form the CSIs. Lindsey had made her way over to the other side of the bed and bent down, scooping the underweight kid up. "I got 'em."

Gil stepped around and took the boy from her. They watched as the boy curled into himself in a defensive posture, as if he expected to be hit. "It's okay Drew. No one is going to hurt you," Gil said softly. "But why are you in here?"

Drew slowly turned to look at Jim. A small finger emerged as he pointed at the detective.

Catherine stepped closer. "You came to see about Jim?"

Drew nodded and pointed again. Gil moved closer to the bed to give the boy a better look. "He's hurt but he will be okay, Drew. Right now, he's just tired so he's asleep."

Drew wiggled until Gil couldn't hold him and he crawled out onto Jim's bed. He carefully edged up and nestled in under Jim's free arm and rested against him, his small arm lying across Jim's chest. Within minutes, he was asleep too.

The three watched in fascination as the small boy melded with Jim. "That's odd," commented Gil.

"Yeah," agreed Catherine. "He hardly knows Jim…just from Jim pulling him from the car."

"I think it's kind of cute," added Lindsey.

Just then the door flew open and an out of breath woman in her mid fifties blew into the room. "There he is!" She looked straight at Drew.

"Who are you?" Catherine asked. "And why are you in my husband's room?"

"I'm Edna Goodlette and I'm from CPS. Drew is one of my cases now. He ran away from the nurse that was taking care of him and we've been looking all over since then."

"What are his injuries?" Gil asked.

"A few cuts and bruises from tonight and a pretty good knot on his head. But he shows sign of severe neglect and abuse, so I wanted him checked out."

Catherine looked at the boy, her heart breaking for him. "How old is he?"

"Six but he looks more like a four year old. He barely talks and he's scared of everyone and everything." The woman huffed as she looked at him.

"Well he's not scared of Jim," Lindsey observed.

"So I see…" the woman said.

Jim's eyes began to open and he groaned, which stirred Drew. The small blue eyes flew open, terror stricken as they focused on all the people in the room. He burrowed into a surprised Jim, who chuckled when he realized what was pushing on his side. "Drew?"

The small head gazed up over Jim's chest into his face, eyes wide with hope.

"Hey kid, whatcha doing here?"

Drew continued to stare. "He came to visit," Catherine told Jim. "He was hiding under the bed until we realized he was there. Then he crawled into bed with you. He won't have anything to do with the rest of us, even is afraid of us. He just wants you."

Jim looked at Catherine as she explained but now his gaze turned back to Drew. He used his good arm to hold the little guy closer. Then he glanced at the older woman.

"She's CPS, Jim. She came to take Drew back to his room," Catherine explained.

Jim felt the shudder that travelled through the small body next to him. He looked back at the boy. "You should go with her."

Drew clung to Jim tighter. Ms. Goodlette stepped closer to take the boy and everyone saw the panic in the small body. Jim held up his hand to stop the woman. "He'll go when he is ready, not before," Jim told her.

"But I…" as she saw the determination in Jim's face, she paused. "This is highly irregular."

Lindsey stepped closer, her body providing a barrier between Drew and the woman. "Well Jim's not your regular guy. He's special and I guess Drew sees that."

The woman huffed again and then stormed out of the room. "Where do you think she's going?" Catherine asked.

"To get reinforcements, I suppose." Gil smiled. "The Brass clan is pretty intimidating."

Jim chuckled and then winced as pain shot through his shoulder. The doctor entered and immediately insisted that the child be removed from the bed. Drew cowered as he realized what the doctor was saying. Gil reached to pick him up but Drew scooted over to Lindsey instead. She smiled and lifted him off the bed, then took his hand. "We're going to get something to eat," she told the others. "Then I'll bring Drew back so he can check on Jim."

Catherine smiled and winked at her daughter. Reaching into her wallet, she handed Lindsey some cash. "Don't let the wicked witch find you."

"No worry…" Lindsey said as she led Drew from the room.

Gil watched the scene with amusement. "Catherine I think you may have a son soon."

Catherine looked over at Jim who was watching as the doctor checked his wound. "Jim and I need to talk first…"

"Of course." Gil smirked as he looked at Jim also. Jim had a huge heart. There was no doubt in Gil's mind how things would turn out.

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Many, many thanks to those who review. You make my day! I do appreciate your continued interest and it keeps me interested too. Okay, so Jim's not dead; not even close. And Drew is in the picture. Comments? Suggestions? Tomatoes?


	29. Making Plans

Soon Jim's wounds were stitched and bandaged. "I want him here for a day or two until we are sure the antibiotics are taking acre of any infection," the doctor explained. "Also, he lost a lot of blood, so we'll need to give him some plasma until his system can produce more. Tomorrow we'll have him sitting up for awhile and with luck he'll be ready to go home the next day."

Catherine nodded as she absorbed all that was said. "No long term effects?"

"I doubt it, although he'll have one hellava scar. Someone will be here in a few minutes to take him to his room. I'll check on him there again later, before I leave."

"Thank you doctor," Catherine said, relieved.

"I'll go find Lindsey," Gil offered. "We'll meet you up in the room."

"Thanks Gil."

Catherine turned to Jim as Gil left. "You're damned lucky, you know that don't you?"

His dark blue eyes bored into hers, filled with love and appreciation. "I am reminded every time you look at me," he answered. "I'm sorry that you to had to worry. I really was trying to stay out of the line of fire, but when I saw that guy trying to leave with the kid…I had to do something."

"I know," she smiled bittersweetly. "Seems you made a friend for life," she chuckled.

"Yeah…what's with the kid, anyway?"

"The CPS witch says he's been neglected and abused. He's a six year old with a four year old body. He barely talks and trusts no one…except you, it seems. And maybe Lindsey a little."

"What do ya think's going to happen to the little guy?"

"I imagine he'll be adopted by a very stable, loving couple who have a daughter but really want a little boy very badly."

"I hope so," Jim responded. "But with all that he has to overcome, I don't see how."

"Well, half the battle is won. He already trusts the daddy…" Catherine watched as her meaning dawned in Jim's mind. "And the big sister is winning him over too…"

Jim gazed up at her, his mouth open but no words coming out. Finally he swallowed, collected his thoughts and spoke. "Us?"

"Can't think of anyone better," she replied. "You two already seem to have bonded."

"B…BB…But…" Jim sputtered.

"Gil suggested it and we all know how smart Gil is…so it must be a good idea."

"Bbbut….are you sure? I mean, a kid like that, there's no telling what all he's been through. He might be behind, you know? And there might be behavioral problems…"

"What? Big Jim Brass can't handle a six year old boy?" She teased. "I'm disappointed."

"I…well, …what about you? I mean, a kid wasn't exactly in the plan. We're at a stage in our lives where we should be thinking about taking it easy. Lindsey will be off to college in a couple of years and we'll have free time to do whatever we want. You ready to trade that in on a troubled kid?"

"I'm in of you're in," she smiled. "It'll…" her expression changed, becoming sad. "It'll make up for the baby we lost," she sighed. "Don't you see Jim? It is right for all the right reasons."

Jim looked at his wife and saw the body language. She wanted this. "You always did want more kids, didn't you?"

"Yeah…I did. I mean, I've been happy with just Lindsey and me and now I have you and I could be very happy with that, but it's like we're being given a chance to have it all."

He wasn't sure if it was the drugs in his system or if he was tired or what, but tears pooled in Jim's eyes. "Baby, with you I have it all. I don't need more. But, if you really want this, then I'm in. I wouldn't mind another shot at fatherhood. Although the kid's gonna get tired of having a dad that is old before it's all over."

"You're not old Jim...just seasoned."

"Yeah maybe…but I'll be old by the time this kid graduates high school. You'll have to wheel me in to the ceremony."

"We'll get one of those motorized chairs for you and you can drive yourself," Catherine chuckled. "But it won't be because you're old…"

"It won't?"

"No. It'll be because I wore you out, Studly. You'll be like one of those stud horses that's been used too many times and develops back problems."

"Oh really?" Jim's eyes began to twinkle. "I like the sound of that."

"Yeah. Seems your shoulder will take some time to heal, so you might have to get used to being ridden now."

"Know any cowgirls?" He teased.

"Only one," she said coquettishly. "But she rides hard."

"Oh, if it's the cowgirl I'm thinking of….hard I can do," Jim chuckled.

"Just wait 'til I get you home," she whispered.

"God woman, you're going to kill me aren't you?"

"Oh but you'll die a happy man."

His hand traced the line of her jaw and then caressed her cheek. "I already am."

Gil found Lindsey in the hall outside the cafeteria. "Hey, they're moving Jim to a room," he told her. Looking around he asked, "where's Drew?"

"The wicked witch of CPS found us and nabbed him," Lindsey told him. "I tried to stop her. He looked so sad as she hauled him away."

"It's okay, Lindsey. I have a feeling it's only temporary."

They walked back to find Jim being wheeled down the hall on his gurney. "Room 329," Catherine told them. Gil nodded and led Lindsey to the elevators. "Can you find it on your own? I want to go find out what happened to Drew."

"Sure," she told him. "We'll see you up there later?"

"Yeah, I won't be long."

Gil headed to the nurse's desk. Flashing his ID, he explained that he was looking for Drew. The nurse smiled at him and directed him to a room in the corner. "He should be in there. That is, if he hasn't escaped again."

Gil walked to the room and stood in the doorway. Ms. Goodlette had a firm hold on the boy as the doctor examined him. Gil waited until the exam was over and the doctor walked out. Catching the doctor in the hall, Gil explained the situation. "They just took Jim Brass up to his room but we wanted to know about Drew. Jim got shot trying to protect the boy; don't you think he deserves some consideration here?"

The doctor shrugged. "I don't see any harm. The boy is malnourished and had been abused, both physically and sexually. He can speak but seems to choose not to. He'll need a psychiatric exam, but I can tell you now that he has a long road ahead. I'm not sure that he will ever be able to trust anyone and even though we haven't evaluated him yet, my guess is his behind developmentally."

"So what will that do to his chances of adoption?"

"You'd have to ask the battle axe in there with him, but realistically, I'd say slim to none. I mean, who'd want to deal with all of that?"

"I know a couple," Gil offered.

"Well, good luck to them; they'll need it." The doctor disappeared down the hallway. Gil looked into the room where the boy sat, petrified. Ms. Goodlette had her back to the door so she didn't see when Gil slipped out one of his business cards, wrote 'Jim: 329' on it and put it on the counter by the door. He looked at Drew and winked before heading for the elevators. A half hour later, Ms. Goodlette was again roaming the halls, looking for a small boy. The card on the counter was gone.

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Searching...searching...ah yes, the little button is still there.


	30. Highly Irregular

In room 329, Gil explained what he had found out. Jim moaned and Catherine gasped as Gil told them what the doctor said. Lindsey began to cry.

Lindsey looked at her mother. "Can I borrow some money?"

"What for, honey?"

"There's a gift shop downstairs and there's this stuffed giraffe Drew was looking at…"

"Oh, yeah…sure." Catherine reached in her wallet and pulled out a twenty. "See if they have a clean tee shirt for him too."

Lindsey left and Catherine gazed at Jim. She thought she knew what he was thinking but she needed time to think. Soon Jim was sleeping, which gave Catherine a chance to process it all. She looked over at Gil, who shot her an 'I know what you're thinking' look as he smirked. "Isn't it obvious?" he asked.

A few minutes later Lindsey returned with the giraffe and a miniature scrubs outfit. "I saw this and it was the right price," she explained. Catherine smiled. Jim woke up and groggily watched as Lindsey showed her mother the outfit.

Gil was ready to leave and offered to take Lindsey home. Catherine refused to leave and the men knew there was no point in arguing. Just as they turned to walk out the door, Drew darted in. He stopped and gave Gil and Lindsey a small smile then looked at Catherine shyly before scampering to Jim's bed. He stopped and peered up. Jim chuckled. "Hey, little man. You found us."

Drew turned nervously to look at Gil and all eyes followed Drew's gaze. Gil stood there, his face blank, looking innocent. Drew smiled and Gil winked at him. "Come on, Lindsey. I'll take you home. You have to be tired." Then looking at the couple he added, "We'll find Ms. Goodlette and send her up. I'm sure she'll have the information you need."

"Thanks, just a minute, please?" Lindsey asked.

Gil nodded and Lindsey walked over to Jim. "I'm really glad you're going to be okay," she told him. Then she surprised him by kissing his cheek. "I'll see you at home, okay Dad?"

Stunned, Jim watched her walk out with Gil. "Did she just call me what I think she called me?"

Catherine smiled, tears in her eyes. "Yeah, she did. Guess you're a daddy again."

Drew looked at Catherine and then at Jim. "You're not her real daddy?" he asked in a quiet voice.

Both adults looked at the boy, astonished that he had spoken. Jim recovered and answered. "No Drew, Lindsey is Catherine's daughter from a previous marriage. Her real father died a few years ago."

"So, you're not a real daddy?" Drew looked hurt.

"Jim has a daughter, Drew. Her name is Ellie but she is all grown up now and lives in a different city."

"Oh," he said. He looked from Jim to Catherine and then back at Jim. "So…you probably don't want anymore kids?"

Jim glanced at Catherine who looked bemused. "Well, it's not just me involved here, Drew. Catherine and I are married. It means we are a team. We both would have to want more kids…and the kid would have to want both of us."

Shyly, Drew looked back at Catherine. "You're the mommy?"

"Yes honey, I am…Lindsey's mom anyway. Ellie's mommy lives in New Jersey."

"My mommy is dead. He shot her dead," Drew said sadly.

"I know honey. That must make you feel very sad."

"He shot her and then he shot that policeman. And then he was going to run away and that's when….he," Drew looked back at Jim, "he took me away."

"Is that why you keep coming back to Jim, because he saved you from that man?"

Drew looked at the floor. "He's nice…he helped me. Mommy….her friends would come over and they would make funny noises when they played in her room. Some of them would hit me if I wasn't quiet. But…Stan, he made me call him daddy and he hurt me."

"He hurt you?" Jim asked.

Drew nodded. "He hit me like the others and then he….he did bad things and he made me do bad things too." Drew whispered.

Catherine reached for him and pulled him into her lap. "Oh honey, I'm so sorry you were hurt." Tears ran down her face. Looking up at her, Drew touched the tears on her cheeks. He frowned and looked at her oddly. "My mommy never cried. I told her that he did bad things and she just went back to play with him. She liked him more than me. She always liked her friends more than me."

Catherine looked over Drew's head at Jim; silent communication was held and finally Jim nodded. "Drew, would you like to come live with us?" she asked the boy.

"That lady said I have to live in a foster home. What's a foster home?"

Jim joined the conversation. "Well, I suppose we could be a foster home for awhile until a judge says you can live with us forever."

His eyes got huge. "You would be my mommy and my…"

"Daddy?" Jim asked.

"No!" Drew cried. "Not Daddy."

"You don't want Jim to be your daddy?" a surprised Catherine asked.

"Stan made me call him daddy. I don't like having a daddy…"

Understanding dawned on Jim and Catherine. "Well," began Jim, "daddy is just a word for father. We'll just have to find another word."

Drew looked up at Catherine and then over at Jim. He crawled out of her lap and headed for his bed, where he tried to climb in. Catherine walked over and lifted him and he immediately scooted closer. Using his good hand, Jim pulled the boy close to him. "You want to be my son, Drew?"

Nodding, Drew snuggled closer to Jim.

"How about Papa?" Catherine suggested. "There are a lot of places where fathers are called papa."

Jim smiled. "What do you think, Drew?"

"Papa," was his answer.

A few minutes later, Ms. Goodlette appeared, huffing and obviously angry with Drew. But she turned her anger on Catherine. "Why do you keep doing this? Why don't you just leave the boy alone." Her glare was hostile; her frustration palatable.

Catherine sat, shocked at the woman's enmity. Jim straightened up, wanting to confront the woman who was attacking his Catherine, but Drew beat was ahead of him in defending Catherine. "She didn't do nothing," his small voice cried out. "I runned away by myself."

The woman was taken aback. "So, you can talk?" The boy nodded.

"Actually, Ms. Goodlette," Catherine spoke up, "we want to talk to you about Drew."

Her glare returned to Catherine. "Oh?"

"Jim and I ….we've discussed it and we would like to have Drew come live with us…adopt him."

The woman's gaze shifted to Jim and then the boy. "Just because you were shot while saving him?" She asked Jim.

"No. We would never have known about him maybe, if I hadn't been called to the scene; but now that we do know him….we want to have him live with us. We like the kid…he likes us and is comfortable."

"But there's much more to it than just liking the boy. He will need special care…"

"Which we are willing to give….and we have the financial resources to be able to offer towards that," Catherine said.

"As I understand things, you both work for the Sherriff's office."

"Yes, Jim is a detective and a captain and I work at CSI. I'm a supervisor. We both have good salaries. Plus, I will inherit a substantial amount of money from my father's estate when it is settled."

"Your father was wealthy?"

"Yes, and once his business holdings have been separated from his personal holdings….well, I am his only heir."

"May I ask who your father was?"

"Sam Braun," Catherine said uncomfortably.

"He was your father? And you work for the Sherriff and are married to a policeman?" The woman was incredulous. "You expect me to believe that….why, Braun was a mobster."

"He was not," Jim interceded. "And I should know. He didn't always play by our rules, but he wasn't a mobster." Jim didn't want Catherine to have to explain Sam. He wished that she'd never mentioned the man.

"Well, there will procedures that must be followed," Ms. Goodlette changed the subject. "Paperwork and inspections…"

"And in the meantime, what happens to Drew?" Jim asked.

"He'll be placed in foster care."

"Why can't he stay with us?" Catherine asked. "Let us be his foster parents until we can adopt him."

"Highly irregular…" she commented. "I don't see how." Then turning her attention back to Drew, "Come Drew. Let's go back to your room."

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I really, really do appreciate those of you who review and comment on a regular basis. Your encouragemnet keeps me going:-) Thank you.


	31. Catherine's Gold

Know any good lawyers?" Jim asked Catherine. "The only ones I know are criminal lawyers."

"Yeah, I know a couple…" Catherine said as she thought about who might be best.

"Just not that Novack sleeze, please." Jim winced as he said the man's name.

"Oh, he's criminal, so he wouldn't be a good choice anyway. But, why so you dislike him so much?"

"After what he did to you? You're kidding, right?"

"Jim, that cut on my cheek was an accident…"

"Yeah, right…one that he caused. And then he showed up at your house…"

"But he's changed…"

"Just glossed over some of the sleeze," Jim growled. "He's still slimy underneath."

"Okay, okay," said Catherine, chuckling. "He wouldn't be a good choice anyway. I'll talk to the attorney that's handling Sam's estate; he can suggest someone."

"Oh great….a mob lawyer." Jim rolled his eyes.

"Wait, you just told Madame CPS that Sam wasn't a mobster…"

"Right…"

"But his lawyer is?"

"Well…Sam wasn't his only client, Catherine."

"Thanks for sharing that little piece of information with me…"

"Look, Sam chose him….he must have trusted the guy."

"Yeah, but I'm not so sure I do now." Catherine looked worried.

"It's fine Baby. The guy is on the up and up; I checked him out."

"So you were just yanking my chain?" Catherine glowered.

"Yeah," he teased. "You're beautiful when you get rattled, you know that?"

His hang-dog expression softened Catherine's irritation. "Damn, you're incorrigible…"

Jim winked and smiled. "That's why you love me, baby…"

"You are so going to pay for that…"

Jim grinned. "Do I have to go to time out?"

"Keep it up and you'll spend the rest of your life there…"

"Oh, yeah Baby….I like the sound of that." Then it occurred to Jim, that maybe she meant he wouldn't live much longer…not once she got finished with him. A small chuckle erupted from his chest. _Oh but what a way to go…_he thought.

They both dozed off for while. Catherine woke up first and when Jim woke up, he watched her. She seemed deep in thought, her expression serious.

"You okay baby?"

She looked up at him and smiled. "Yeah…I was just thinking how differently my life has turned out than I expected."

"Good different, I hope." He was suddenly terrified.

"Most definitely." Her hand clasped his. "I am married to a wonderful man and almost have two children. When Eddie died…well, I thought it was all over except the raising Lindsey part."

"But this is not exactly your fantasy outcome?"

"No, it's better." She squeezed his hand.

"Well, my fantasy is to die in the middle of getting it on with a beautiful woman…hard and fast."

Catherine's jaw dropped but she recovered quickly. "Have anyone in mind?" Jim just twinkled at her. "Cause if you do that to me," she warned, "I'll stomp on your grave."

"Just be sure to wear a short skirt and some lacy panties…or even better, no panties; the view will be terrific."

She looked at him in amazement. "And to think you'll soon be a role model for a young boy…"

Jim smirked at her. "I promise to keep my lecherous thoughts to myself…"

She bent over him and planted a kiss that was so hot, Jim began to sweat. When she let him come up for air, he chuckled. She turned to sit back in her chair and he grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him. His blues eyes had turned steely and his expression was one of raw hunger. It took Catherine's breath away. "Not so fast," he growled. He tugged at her again until she was over him and then moved his hand behind her head, pulling her to him. Their lips met and this time he caused her discomfort. Suddenly she felt light headed as his tongue sought hers and danced. When an eager moan rumbled out of her, he chuckled, but the kiss continued.

Finally he let her escape. Looking into his enflamed eyes, she asked. "How long do you have to be here?"

"Too long baby. Way too long."

"Well, you are obviously feeling better," she smirked as she ran her hand along his thigh, noticing a change in the shape of the sheet covering him near her hand.

He shot her a cocky look. He knew she wanted it. Problem for him was, he didn't know if it was the drugs or what, but he doubted that without them, he'd have what it took. His shoulder was already beginning to hurt again. He shifted his torso and winced, something that wasn't lost on Catherine.

"You need to lie back more," she told him. "And rest a little. You're an injured man, remember?"

"You keep teasing me like that and I'm liable to have more injuries," he taunted as the bed obeyed her finger on the recline button. "Might hurt my back from all the activity, Cowgirl."

Catherine started laughing. "I left my riding crop at home, Studly. We'll have to save those activities for later."

He smiled weakly. "Probably a good thing," he said as his eyes began to feel heavy. "Think I'll take a nap…" Catherine watched as he dozed off.

Once she was sure he was asleep, she stepped out to the waiting room and dialed her cell phone. After a short conversation with Sam's attorney, she was dialing another number. She explained to the receptionist what she needed and gave her the cell number. The woman on the other end promised that they would hear from the attorney that afternoon. Satisfied that she had done all that she could for the moment, Catherine debated whether to go check on Jim or locate Drew. She decided to do both.

Jim was still asleep and Catherine stood watching him. She thought of their conversation earlier…his comment about him not being her fantasy. As she scrutinized his sleeping countenance, she had to admit that she had always been attracted to the hunks, dark, sexy men that looked like they could model for a magazine. Jim definitely did not fit that description. But he was a better man than any of the others…all of the others combined. She hoped briefly that Lindsey had learned from her mistake. Vaguely she remembered something about not judging a book by its cover. While Jim wasn't hard to look at, there was plainness…ordinariness about his features that made him easy to overlook. But everything about him was pure gold, she had discovered. He was as good as it gets and she was lucky to have him. She caressed his cheek and planted a gentle kiss on his forehead, whispered 'I love you' and then left to find Drew.

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A little shorter this time but it says what I wanted it to say. Hope you enjoyed.

Also, I've posted a new poll on my profile page. Check it out if you like those things. You get to make as many as five choices. I doubt that TPTB actually see these things, but it's nice to offer opinions anyway;-)

As always, reviews are much appreciated!


	32. Names

A few minutes later, Jim woke up to the sound of the door flying open. A small blur flew into the room and his bed shook as the little body scurried under it. A larger body appeared in the doorway. Jim surmised from the outfit that she was wearing that the woman was a nurse. "There you are, you little Houdini," she laughed when she spotted Drew under the bed. "Come on out and let's let this man get his rest."

A whimper was heard from under the bed. "Drew?" Jim called.

The bed shook a little more as the boy crawled out on the side opposite the nurse. His small blue eyes peered up over the side to look at Jim.

"You know this boy?" the nurse asked.

"He's Drew. I um…I got him out of the car…you know, when that guy was going to kidnap him." Jim was trying not to say anymore than necessary. He didn't want to go over all the details in front of Drew. It was already all too real to the kid.

"Oh…you're the cop…they said he keeps running to you."

"Where's the jailer?" The woman looked confused. "Ms. Goodlette?" he continued.

"Oh, she left for awhile. Warned us not to let him get away. She said he's a real delinquent."

Jim snarled and groaned. "He is not! He's had a rough time and seen way more than a boy his age should see, but he's okay…just scared and he seems to feel safe with me."

The nurse's expression changed. "Can he stay here for a few minutes with you while I check on something with the doctor?"

"Sure," Jim replied, confused.

The nurse disappeared and Drew seemed to relax. "Hey kid, climb on up here," Jim told him.

Drew walked to the other side of the bed, scooted a chair close, climbed into it, and then crawled across to the bed. Once he was on the bed, he crawled under Jim's good arm and lay down. Jim moved his arm to cradled Drew and patted his back. "It's gonna be okay, Drew. We just have to be a little patient. You know what that is?"

Drew nodded negatively. "It means we have to try to relax while we wait for good things to happen. Catherine and I are going to do everything we can to have you come live with us, oaky? But in the meantime, we have to do what Ms. Goodlette says, even if we don't like it."

Drew's eyes filled with tears. "Don't want to go with her…I want you…and Indsey…and…"

"Catherine?"

"Yeah…but she's not m y mommy."

"No, but she'll be like one when you come live with us."

"My mommy didn't cry when they hurt me…ssshe cried."

"She loves you already, Drew. She wants you to live with us as much as I do."

"If you're gonna be my Papa, what do I call her?"

"Well, usually Papa and Mama go together."

Drew got quiet, so quiet that Jim thought he was asleep. His thoughts turned to what it would be like trying to raise a troubled little boy. On the other hand, he realized that for awhile, he had been a troubled youth so maybe that might give him some insight. But his troubles had never been anything compared to Drew's. And he had been a dismal failure with Ellie. But those circumstances were different he postulated…not at all the same. Besides, he planned to be around for Drew. His biggest failure was not being there enough for Ellie; he wouldn't make that mistake again.

Lost in his thoughts, Jim didn't see the door open again and was surprised when Drew's head popped up and he called out, "Mama" gleefully. Jim looked up to see Catherine staring at the boy, stunned. "We decided on a name for you," Jim informed her.

Tears formed in her eyes as she approached. "I love my new name," she smiled. "But I think we need to honor the occasion with a hug. May I hug you Drew?" Drew crawled over and allowed himself to be wrapped in her arms. Then he settled, sitting next to Jim.

"I don't want to be Drew anymore," he announced.

Catherine chuckled at his forthrightness. "What do you want to be called? Andrew…or Andy?"

"No….Jim, like him," he said as he pointed at Jim.

"But that might be a little confusing, don't you think? Having two Jims in the house?"

"Oh," Drew's face fell.

I have an idea," Jim said. "When you come live with us, we have to go to court and talk to a judge and he'll change your last name to Brass, like our last name. We can ask if we can change your name to Andrew James. That way, you'll have my name as your middle name. Okay?"

"Yeah," Drew said sadly. "But I'll still be Drew."

Catherine thought a moment and then said it aloud. "Andrew James…A.J… we could call you AJ then."

Drew looked up and smiled. "AJ? Cool, I like AJ."

Jim cautioned him, however. "We have to wait 'til the judge says it's okay. Until then we still have to call you Drew."

"Why do we have to have a judge? Did you have a judge when you had Insey?"

Catherine smiled sadly. "No, I didn't but in this case, you belonged to someone else. Now that she's gone, the state wants to be sure we're good people; that we won't hurt you like those men hurt you…"

"Yeah, so they'll investigate us to be sure we can give you a good home," Jim continued. "And then a judge reads the report and says yes or no, depending on what the report says."

"And when he says yes, then I'll be Andrew James Brass?"

"That's the idea," Jim said.

"Okay….then I'll be pa…pashin…"

"Patient." Jim smiled.

"Yeah, that…"

Catherine's cell rang. "This is Catherine," she said into it.

"This is Myra Jenkins…I am returning your call about adopting a child."

"Yes, Ms. Jenkins. My husband and I would like to adopt a little boy that Jim, my husband pulled from a car at a crime scene last night."

"Could you come by my office and we can go over the details?"

"Well, right now Jim is still in the hospital. He was shot in the process, you see. And we don't want to wait to start things until he is well enough to go to your office."

"Shot? Oh my, I am sorry. Is he going to okay?"

"Yes, he'll be fine. It just will be a few weeks until he is up and back to normal."

"Oh, I see. Well, I believe I can steal some time tomorrow afternoon to make a trip to the hospital. I'll have my secretary call you and give you a time to expect me. And please give my regards to your husband…oh wait, I remember seeing that on the news. Your husband is Captain Brass?"

"Yes, he is."

"Oh yes….this isn't the first time he's been a hero then, is it?"

"No…but the people who do his job are all heroes Ms. Jenkins, whether they get shot or not."

"Oh no, I didn't mean to imply…oh, I'm sorry if… I just meant that he has saved quite a few lives and put many criminals behind bars. More than the average, I would think."

"Well, yes. He _is_ good at what he does." Catherine smiled as she saw Jim's face growing red from embarrassment. "So, we'll wait to hear from your secretary then…"

"Yes. And I will see you both tomorrow."

Catherine closed the phone. "She'll be by tomorrow."

Jim nodded. Drew looked confused but decided that whatever they were talking about must be a good thing.

The nurse reappeared in the doorway with a male assistant behind her. He was pushing a small bed. "I checked with your doctor, Mr. Brass and with Drew's. They agree that Drew should stay in here with you tonight. Your doctor said that his presence wouldn't cause any harm and his doctor said that it might actually help him get some much needed rest. It seems he spends all his time running away from us to find you. They both agreed that at least we'll know where to find him and we might actually have time for other patients if he is in here. Is that okay with you?"

Jim smiled. "Yes, of course."

"But your doctor did say that he wants Drew in his own bed so that you can get the rest that you need too. So we brought a child's gurney in for him."

Jim looked at Drew. "You can stay here Drew, but you have to stay in the other bed. They'll park it close so you can see me or talk to me when you need to, okay?"

Drew nodded and allowed himself to be moved to the other bed. The assistant set it up next to Jim's with just enough space for the nurses to slip in between to check on both patients. Drew seemed content with the arrangement. Within minutes he was asleep holding the giraffe that Lindsey had bought him, the giraffe he had left in his room on the children's floor; the nurse had thought to bring it along. As Jim and Catherine watched him curl up and drift away, they both thought how he looked like any other small boy, safe and content with a stuffed friend, happy.

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Sorry it took so long to update. The computer decided to give me grief. We've had a little chat and it understands now that that sort of behavior is unacceptable.

Many thanks to all those who reviewed while I was MIA. It was wonderful to open up so many great comments! Hope you still like. More coming soon.


	33. Myra Jenkins

Myra Jenkins appeared after lunch the next day. She got the entire story about Drew, as much as they knew, anyway. She also asked some questions about Jim and Catherine, their life together and their previous lives. Jim had to reveal the story of Ellie and her present situation. Ms. Jenkins frowned. "Well, that's not good, but we can work with it," she assured Jim. "We need to show how you've tried to help her."

"I went to LA a few years ago when her roommate went missing. I tried to get her to quit then…make her see what she was doing to herself. But she refused to listen. She did call me sometime later and said she was ready to go into drug rehab and I paid for that. She went to a program that had been recommended by a friend in LA. It has a really good success rate. The last time I knew anything, she was still clean."

"So you don't have much contact with her?"

"No. I have a friend at LAPD that keeps an eye out for her and let's me know how things are going, but she and I haven't talked since I was shot and almost died three years ago."

"So you've shut her out of your life then?"

"More the other way around," he told her.

"So if she shows up on your doorstep?"

"If my daughter Ellie shows up, she will be welcome in my home. But if that drugged up prostitute shows up, then no. We have Lindsey at home and I don't want her exposed to anything _that_ Ellie might have to say. And if we get custody of Drew…well, he's seen enough of that kind of thing; he shouldn't ever have to be reminded of it. So, no…she's not welcome unless she's straightened herself out. I'll do anything I can to help her get there, but she has to want to make it happen."

Ms. Jenkins seemed satisfied with his answer. Then she turned her attention to Catherine. She asked a lot of questions, many of them dealing with her days as a dancer. But in the end, she seemed equally satisfied with Catherine's responses." Well, I'm sure that CPS will investigate thoroughly but I see nothing in your stories that we can't work with. It will be a grueling process that will require patience and stamina on all of your parts. This could take up to a year to finalize. But if this is what you want to do, then I can get started on it right away."

The couple agreed that she should start immediately. Myra smiled and then turned to Drew. "I have just a couple more questions. Drew, do you want the Brasses to adopt you….do you want to be their little boy?"

Drew's eyes stared soberly at the woman. "Yes," he said softly. "Mama and Papa."

"Why do you want to be their little boy?"

"Papa…he saved me from that bad man and he doesn't hurt me. Stan hurted him when he took me out of the car. He's a nice man and I'm not scared with him. And Mama, she yoves me already. She cried when I to'd her how that man hurt me. My mommy never cried, she liked him better than me. And Insey…she's nice too. She got me a giraffe," he said holding up the stuffed animal.

Myra turned back to Jim and Catherine. "I'll start with trying to get temporary custody. We'll need to have our own psychiatrist examine him; evaluate his relationship with you. When do you leave the hospital?"

Catherine spoke. "The doctor says probably tomorrow. But his activities will still be limited once he gets home."

"Tomorrow? Oh my, I need to get busy then. I'll be in touch later this afternoon. I'm going to try to get a judge to look at this tomorrow morning at the latest."

"Thank you," Jim said. "We don't want him to go into the system and then we lose him."

"It's my job to convince a judge that Drew will be lost if he is not allowed to stay with you. That's where our shrink can help now. As I said, I'll be in touch this afternoon." Then she was gone.

"What do you think?" Catherine asked Jim, glancing in Drew's direction.

"I don't know. She seems competent…we'll just have to trust her to know what she is doing. Sam's attorney recommended her…she must be good."

The psychiatrist showed up mid afternoon to talk with Drew. Myra Jenkins called a short time later to tell them that she had a hearing with a family court judge in the morning. "We should have an answer on the temporary custody by noon tomorrow. I'll need Catherine in court. Can you stall your release from the hospital until afternoon?"

"Yeah, we'll make it happen," Jim told her. "You just make the custody happen."

Catherine finally went home to sleep that night. Jim had convinced her that with her appearing in court and him going home the next day and possibly Drew too, she would need her energy. After some coaxing, she finally agreed. It left Jim alone with Drew for the night, with nurses just a button call away.

Once again Drew scooted a chair close to Jim's bed and climbed in. The two laid in the bed watching "Are You Smarter than a Fifth Grader?" on tv. Drew didn't have any answers to the questions but seemed to understand that the kids knew more than the adult contestant. Jim was pleased with himself for the number of questions he could answer…without the help of the students.

The next morning Catherine appeared at Family Court and located Myra Jenkins. Myra had Catherine sit at the table with her and Catherine followed the proceedings closely as Myra made her case for Drew to live with them. The attorney presented their case along with a preliminary report from the psychiatrist concluding that it would be traumatic for the boy to be separated from the Brass family, Jim especially. The shrink had observed that the boy had already been through a traumatic ordeal and that it was a surprise that he had trusted anyone so quickly. Trust would be an issue for this child, the report said, and it would help him heal to be with a family he trusted.

Ms. Goodlette had her say also, implying that somehow from his hospital bed, Jim had encouraged the boy to keep running away from her. She also presented preliminary findings from a quick investigation into the family that revealed Catherine's past as a dancer and touched on some of Jim's problems in New Jersey. They hadn't uncovered Ellie yet. Goodlette also suggested that Jim and Catherine both had dangerous jobs and that might have an adverse effect on Drew.

The judge listened attentively and then looked at Catherine. "Mrs. Brass, I am glad to see you here. Where is your husband?"

"He's in the hospital, Your Honor. "He was injured while rescuing Drew. We expect him to be released later today and he will continue his recovery at home."

"Injured? How?"

"The suspect fired his weapon while Jim was pulling Drew from the car. Jim covered Drew and took a bullet in the process."

"So…Mr. Brass could have been killed protecting the boy?"

"The wound was never that serious, Your Honor. But Jim would have protected Drew with his last breath, if necessary."

"Is that normal in his job?"

"Jim is a detective with the rank of Captain. He does occasionally participate in the apprehension of suspects, but as a Captain he generally leaves that task to others."

"Has he ever been wounded before?"

Only once that was life threatening….a few years ago."

"I see," said the judge ominously. "And your job? I see here that you also work for the Sherriff's Department?"

"Yes, I am a Criminalist. I investigate crime scenes. Occasionally we might arrive at a scene that is not yet secure, but police officers clear the area before we enter."

"Police officers, like your husband?"

"Yes…although Jim usually has uniformed officers with him who do the clearing. While Jim does still participate in investigations, his role as a Captain is largely an administrative one." Catherine was trying to take attention away from the danger of their jobs, Jim's especially.

The judge turned his attention back to Ms. Goodlette. "I fail to understand your objection to granting the Brasses temporary custody. The child seems to have formed some sort of connection with Mr…or Captain Brass…" The judge paused, a puzzled expression forming on his face. Then looking back at Catherine, he spoke again. "Captain Brass….he was shot a few years ago extracting a young woman from a hostage situation, correct?"

"Yes, Your Honor."

"He was given a Medal of Valor for that, wasn't he?"

"Yes. But it wasn't his first…"

"And…. He was involved in that shooting…the one where an officer was killed by friendly fire?"

"Yes." Catherine was nervous. She hoped he would not remember that Jim was the one who shot Bell. She remembered that day vividly….how upset Jim had been even before they knew it was his bullet that killed the officer.

"Yes, I recall the details now." He stared at her meaningfully. "Your husband showed great courage."

"Thank you, Your Honor. But he would tell you that he was just doing his job, just doing what was right."

"Yes…" the judge said thoughtfully. Then focusing again on Catherine, he asked another question. "It is your intention to adopt Drew?"

"Yes, it is."

The judge shifted in his chair and then looked across at Ms. Goodlette. "I see no reason to deny temporary custody to James and Catherine Brass. I am ordering that they be given custody immediately and will serve as guardians until either other family members who wish to take custody of him can be located or until arrangements can be made for his adoption. Ms. Goodlette, CPS will monitor Drew's progress under the care of the Brasses and insure that he is given proper medical treatment and is enrolled in school as quickly as possible." Then looking at Catherine, the judge continued, "Good luck, Mrs. Brass. I hope this is one case that ends happily."

"Thank you, Your Honor." Catherine was beaming. She couldn't wait to get to the hospital to tell Jim and Drew the good news. She and Jim were one step closer to having a son.

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So, we like? Continue?? Use the little button down there...yes, it is still there, I just checked! As always reviews are most appreciated and fuel for the typing.


	34. Home

Home. It had been many years since Jim had formed such affection for a place. But when Catherine opened the door and he walked through, he loved the way it felt to him. Maybe it was because of his new life there, maybe because of the small hand that was gripping his, but he knew with certainty that it had to do with the woman who had opened the door and let him in, literally and figuratively. He turned to her, smiling and was staggered by the expression on her face. Joy and tears intermingled in her eyes as she had watched her two 'men' walk inside. Jim stood with his mouth slightly agape as he absorbed the depth of her feelings. If he had ever doubted that she loved him, those doubts were washed away in that moment. _God you are one lucky bastard,_ he told himself.

Catherine regained her composure first and ushered him to the couch. "Sit," she commanded and he obeyed, his eyes never leaving her. Then she took Drew's hand. "Let's go check out your new room," she smiled. Drew glanced back over his shoulder as they walked into the hall and Jim nodded, encouraging him to go with Catherine.

A few minutes later they returned and Drew curled up beside Jim. "How do you like your room?" Jim asked him.

"Okay…flowers…." He said making a sour face.

Jim chuckled. "Yeah, we'll have to do something about that."

"Mama said I could pick any color I want. I have to think about what I want. Can I have Thomas?"

"Thomas?" Jim was perplexed. _Who the hell is Thomas?"_

Catherine chuckled from across the room. "The train, Jim….you know Thomas, the train?"

Jim still looked confused. "I think I'm about to get an education," he smiled. Then looking back at Drew, "we'll have to check this Thomas thing out…"

"We need to do some clothes shopping too," Catherine offered. "Mom is coming over in a little while to stay with you two while I run out and get a few things. Then when everyone is feeling better, we can all go shopping for clothes for Drew and start picking up things for his room."

"Yeah, and we don't have any toys, either." Jim added. "Drew, what kind of toys do you like?" Drew looked at him blankly. "What do you like to play with, Drew?"

Then very shyly Drew answered. "Could…could I have a car? Jamal, he lives next door….to my old house, he had little cars. Could I have a little car?"

"Sure," Jim said as he looked across at Catherine. She nodded, understanding what was being requested. Drew wanted a Matchbox or Hot Wheels car and Jim was telling her to get several. "Anything else? What about this Thomas the train thing?"

"I saw Thomas on TV." Jim glanced at Catherine again. She was making mental notes… Thomas videos…The conversation continued with Catherine getting ideas about what sort of toys would entertain Drew.

A few minutes later, Lily showed up to stay with the two guys. Catherine left after checking to be sure Jim's shoulder was okay and making sure that Drew wasn't going to panic with a new stranger in his life. Lily was playing it safe, however, by being around but not pushing Drew. She patiently waited for him to warm up to her.

Jim helped by telling Drew that Lily would be his grandmother…"Mama's mama," he chuckled.

Drew looked at her with new eyes. "Mama was your little girl?"

"That's right, honey. She was. And sometimes even now, she still is." Lily retrieved a pillow from the bedroom and all but ordered Jim to lie down. "The color is draining from your face. It's time to rest," she told him.

Feeling a bit weak, Jim complied. Drew never ventured more than a few feet away. Once Jim was settled, Lily turned on the TV and found PBS. Mister Rogers was on. "Perfect," she said. Mentally Jim agreed as he listened to the soft voice drone on; the tone and tempo had him in dreamland quickly.

Awhile later the front door opened. Lindsey had just arrived home from school after a friend gave her a ride. Jim and Lily had dozed off but Drew was immediately aware of her arrival. "Insey," he exclaimed happily.

Jim didn't hear him but Lily did and roused enough to greet her granddaughter. Then Lindsey took her things to her room, Drew following her down the hall. Lily smiled as she heard giggles from Lindsey's room a few minutes later.

The Brass household fell into a routine over the next few days. Catherine took Lindsey to school each morning and then returned home to tend to Jim and Drew. Drew had gone to several appointments with the psychiatrist and Catherine had taken him to the local elementary school to enroll him there. The school required testing, since they could not find any record of Drew having attended school before. Drew didn't remember ever going to school either. "Not surprising," Jim had commented.

So Drew underwent several mornings of testing before it was finally decided that he should start in Kindergarten. "He'll still be a little behind," the principal had informed Catherine, "But with help at home, I believe he can catch up quickly."

"Oh, he'll get help," Catherine assured the woman. "Just let us know what it is he's behind on." So Drew and Catherine returned home with a list of things to work on over the weekend. Drew would start Kindergarten the following Monday. Throughout the weekend, they took turns helping Drew with things on the list: writing his name, reciting his name and address and phone number…basic things he might be called on to know and do. Jim delighted in having the little guy curled up next to him, practicing.

By Monday Jim felt good enough to ride with Catherine and Drew as they headed for his first day of school. They walked him to his classroom and each hugged him before the teacher took his hand to guide him inside. "Just remember, baby….we love you," Catherine whispered. "Go get 'em, tiger," Jim said as he hugged Drew one last time. Drew looked back at his Mama and Papa sadly as the teacher led him away.

Jim hesitated, standing with his back to the wall opposite the classroom door. Catherine chuckled. "Usually it's the moms that have separation anxiety," she told him.

He smiled at her. "I just hope it doesn't overwhelm him."

"He'll be okay. And the principal knows to call us immediately if he isn't."

"Yeah," Jim said woefully. "Like that's gonna happen."

Catherine was amused by Jim's attitude through the day. He would lie down but not rest. The phone was always with him and at times he stared at it as if he expected it to ring. Several times he checked on Drew's room. Finally Catherine had to laugh at him.

"What?" He looked at her, perturbed.

"Nothing," she giggled.

"No….what? It has to be something…"

"It's just that you are worse than I was on Lindsey's first day of Kindergarten. He's going to be fine Jim. This is one of the most normal things for him to be doing…every kid starts school sometime."

"Yeah, but not every kid is carrying around the baggage he's carrying. What if her gets scared?"

"They'll call us if things get too out of hand. But he needs to do this…"

"I know….I know, it's just that …he's such a little guy and everything is so scary to him right now. And kids can be pretty mean on the playground; I know, I was one of 'em. And what if he thinks we're not coming back for him?"

"Jim, you told him a hundred times this morning that we would pick him up at 3:00. I think he knows we're coming back. Besides, this will be good for building trust. We tell him something and then we'll be there like we said. He'll learn that we mean what we say and that we are coming back."

"Yeah…I know," he replied dejectedly. Catherine saw the worried expression on his face and analyzed his body language. He needed a distraction.

"So…you probably should take this opportunity to rest." If he had looked up, he would have realized that rest was the last thing on Catherine's mind.

"No, I'm fine," he sighed.

"Oh, I know you are fine," she said as she leaned over him. "Very fine indeed," she said salaciously as her hand began to rub his thigh. She saw him stop fidgeting and his body became very still.

"Ah….Catherine?"

"Jim?" Her eyes were scintillating as her hand continued its activity.

"What…." Before he could get any farther she had moved away, headed down the hall to their room. He sat very still, her meaning registering slowly in his consciousness. Once it settled in his mind, however, Jim headed down the hall too.

There was a trail of clothes across the floor and she was under the sheet, waiting. Jim felt the familiar stirring deep within him and all thoughts of Drew were pushed to the back of his brain. A piquant grin grew on his face as he eyed her. "Rest?"

"Relaxation," she replied. As he looked at her expression, he knew he would soon be feeling _very _relaxed.

His clothes fell among hers along the trail from the door to the bed. Careful of his shoulder, he crawled in and surrendered to her attentions. Since his injury, they had teased and taunted but had not been together. Catherine missed the closeness and was determined to make up for lost time. "Lie back and take it like a man," she told him. Happily he complied.

Their love making was tender and gentle, in part because of his injury and in part because they were feeling the fragility of life. The thought that his life could have ended the night he pulled Drew from the car and he would have missed this afternoon, sobered Jim. The thought that he should have died when Willie Cutler shot him, gave him a greater appreciation for the woman that was with him…on him, loving him. He shuddered inwardly as he realized that he might have missed this…missed having her. Every bad thing that had happened to him in his life seemed worth it if it meant he could be with her now.

Jim could easily be dead now, Catherine realized; his body could be cold…six feet under. It was a miracle that the bullet had missed anything vital and had simply passed through his body, leaving a hole but no further damage. She wanted to hold him, feel him close to her…there was no way he could be close enough. Even when they were joined she ached for more of him…a more permanent connection, but the joining of their bodies could only be temporary and sadness enveloped her when they separated.

"What's wrong," Jim asked with concern when he saw a tear slip out of her eye.

"Nothing…I just…you make me feel so alive, so loved…cherished. When we're together and I'm on the brink…I want more…and…and then I don't think I can take anymore because it is so wonderful. And then it is over and I miss you already."

"I'm here, Baby. I'm still here," he whispered as he held her closely.

"But…you could have been killed and then we wouldn't….I wouldn't even have that… those moments when everything is so right…so complete. Those moments with you that make me feel….so… incredible….no, that's not enough of a word. Marvelous, but that isn't it either. Just….out of this world and fantastic.

He hugged her as tightly as he dared taking in a deep breath as the intensity of her emotions settled into him. "Baby, you make me feel all those things too. When I'm with you…just in the same room with you, it's like my world is all straightened out. And when I'm lucky enough to get to touch you…..and better, I get to hold you, well…I think it just can't get any better. But when we are together and I feel us as one, it….it is bigger than me, bigger than us; enormous. God, I love you so much, love 'us' so much. I love the way you look, the way you feel, smell….and I feel so inadequate about showing you how much you mean to me. But you are everything, Baby."

His words mixed with her lingering emotions combined to light another flame deep within Catherine, one that Jim was happy to help her extinguish. By the time they dozed off, Jim was feeling very relaxed and all his worries about Drew were blurred by the foggy intoxication he felt from imbibing Catherine.

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A comment was made that the last chapter was a little boring. Hopefully this one was better?


	35. Happy and Sad

Drew was elated to see Catherine and Jim waiting for him outside his classroom door. He burrowed into Jim's leg and looked up at Catherine. "How was your first day?" she asked him.

Just then, his teacher appeared in the doorway. "Mr. and Mrs. Brass…good, I hoped to be able to catch you and talk with you a moment."

"Mrs. Shannon, this is my husband Jim," Catherine said, introducing Jim to the teacher.

Jim smiled and Mrs. Shannon nodded an acknowledgement. "Yes….could we go inside the classroom and talk for a minute?"

Jim and Catherine followed her inside. Drew still clung to Jim's leg, his small hands clenching the fabric of Jim's slacks. "Please, have a seat," the woman directed them. Jim sat next to Catherine and Drew crawled into his lap.

"I hope everything went okay," Catherine said.

"Well, yes…and no," was the woman's cryptic reply. A.J. hardly said a word the entire day and would not sit with or talk to the other children."

"Wait….A.J?" Jim asked.

"Yes, he told me that he likes to be called AJ."

Jim looked at the boy. "Is that true?" Drew nodded affirmatively. "But your name hasn't officially been changed yet."

Mrs. Shannon looked at the two. "I'm confused…"

"Drew…Andrew wanted to be called Jim," Catherine explained. "We suggested that when the adoption becomes final he can have his name changed to Andrew James and be called AJ."

"Oh, I see," the teacher nodded. "Well, then….if everyone is agreed, I will continue to call him AJ."

Catherine saw Drew smile at that information. He squirmed a little in Jim's lap before settling down again, his head firmly against Jim's chest.

"AJ tried very hard but I think this is a big adjustment for him, especially with everything else that is happening in his life. The other children seemed to frighten him and whenever we changed activities, he seemed to withdraw. I know this is a difficult time, but have you considered counseling?"

Jim and Catherine exchanged glances. "He already is in counseling," Catherine replied.

"Oh, I see," Mrs. Shannon said thoughtfully.

"You see, he had a very rough time," Jim added. "Trust is a real issue for him. And he's never had much exposure to other children…or adults, for that matter…except the wrong ones. The counselor warned that school would be difficult and that we should take it slowly."

Mrs. Shannon seemed to be formulating an idea. "Let me talk to our school counselor and see if we can't come up with an alternate plan….a way for AJ to attend Kindergarten but also take some of the stress out of it for him. I'll look for you in the morning when you drop him off and tell you what we've come up with."

That afternoon, Jim sat with Drew, reading a book to him. Once the story was over, Jim gathered him close and began talking. "So, did you like school?" Jim asked.

Drew nodded. "Some things…but it was…scary. I cried for you and Mama," he said sadly.

"Mrs. Shannon didn't mention that you had cried," Jim said worriedly.

"I cried on the inside so nobody would hit me. Stan used to hit me when I cried."

"Well, some people believe that real men don't cry. But sometimes…well, you just have to let it out."

"Do you cry?" Drew asked curiously.

Jim thought about the times in his life he had cried. "Yeah, I do sometimes….when I am really happy or really sad. Sometimes what I feel is too much to keep inside, you know?"

"You get sad?"

"Yeah…sometimes. Not so much since Catherine and I got married though. She makes me very happy."

"And Insey?"

"Yes, Lindsey makes me happy too…"

"And your little girl….Ellie?"

"I don't see much of Ellie anymore since she grew up. That makes me sad." Jim thought it best not to get into the whole ugly, messed up story of Ellie.

Drew's face scrunched up. "Don't be sad."

"Wanna know something else that makes me happy?" Jim asked. Drew nodded and smiled. "You." And then Jim began to tickle him. Drew curled up in a ball, wiggling and squealing. Catherine came into the room, out of breath. "Are you guys okay?"

Jim looked up like the proverbial kid with the hand in the cookie jar and Drew giggled again. "You make Papa happy," he exclaimed. Jim winked at her.

"Oh, I do, do I?" She headed for the guys and bent over Drew, kissing his forehead. "You make me happy."

"What, I don't make you happy?" Jim asked with an expression of mocked hurt.

"Oh, you….Mr. Éclair….you make me really happy," she answered as she kissed him.

Drew watched in fascination and then asked, "Who's Mr. Éclair?"

"You don't want to know," laughed Lindsey from the doorway. "Believe me; it'll ruin your taste for donuts forever."

Preparing supper was becoming a family event. It had started with Catherine and Jim including Lindsey, chatting about her day as they worked together. Now a fourth body was added to the mix and Drew happily took on the task of setting the table. Catherine had asked Lindsey earlier to talk with Drew about his day at school. "Maybe he'll open up to you more," she'd told her daughter. "All Jim and I can get is that he was scared."

So Lindsey chose this time to ask him about it. "So how was your day, Drew?"

Drew's smile faded. "Okay," he said sadly.

"Did you meet any new friends?"

"No. the others…they wouldn't talk to me."

"Did you try to talk to them?"

"I tried…but I was scared. They laughed at me."

Yeah, I remember my first day at my new school. It was hard. None of the kids would talk to me and they acted like I was some freak or something. But now I have lots of friends. Just keep trying Drew, I'm sure you'll have friends too before long."

"You…were scared?"

"Yeah," Lindsey said, rolling her eyes. "Staring a new school is scary. Everybody gets scared on their first day. It's okay. But you did it and tomorrow will be easier." Drew looked at her with adoring eyes. "Okay," he said.

Catherine watched the scene proudly. Lindsey was proving to be a big help with Drew. She seemed to understand him when no one else did. And it was obvious that Drew idolized her. For all the grief that Lindsey gave her, she was a good kid and was turning into a special young lady.

Jim watched Catherine as she watched her daughter. He looked across the top of Lindsey's head at his wife and smiled. He understood what she was feeling and it made him happy to see her able to enjoy the moment. As he surveyed the faces in the room, he felt a tear sitting in his eye. Drew glanced up. "Papa, you crying?"

Jim's expression softened as he looked at the boy. "A little maybe."

"You sad? Don't be sad….I won't be so scared tomorrow."

"I'm not sad Drew. Remember, I sad sometimes I cry when I'm really happy? Well, being here with you and Lindsey….and Catherine; it makes me really happy."

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Reviews are dropping off so that tells me this story is winding down. I have a couple of more chapters in mind and then I'll move on to something else. I've got two or three other stories trying to formulate in my head, so maybe it is time. In the meantime...all comments are welcome.


	36. Moving On and Catching a Break

School did get easier for Drew with each passing day. After Mrs. Shannon talked with the counselor, they arranged for Drew to have a little break about mid morning for some quiet time in either the counselor's office or the library. The time alone, away from the others seemed to help and the ritual continued for a few weeks until he finally asked, "do I have to go?" The counselor smiled and said no but he could take a break whenever he felt he needed to. Slowly the other children accepted Drew and soon he was running and playing on the playground with the other boys.

Jim's shoulder healed and he went back to light duty. He tried to get scheduled as much as possible on Graveyard so that he could help with taking the kids to school and picking them up…and share x-rated moments with Catherine while they were away.

He was reveling in the latest of those moments one afternoon while he waited for Drew and Lindsey in the car. Early on Lindsey had made a habit of meeting Drew at his classroom door and walking him out. That way the kids wouldn't have a chance to pick on him after leaving the classroom and he wouldn't get teased about his parents being there all the time.

But Jim's mind wasn't on the kids, it was on Catherine… He realized that the television family of the 50s wasn't reality, but he had spent a lifetime looking for that anyway. He wanted to be Ward Cleaver or Jim Anderson…_yeah_, he smirked…_Father Knows Best_. _Right. More like Father screws up best._ But he wasn't screwing things up this time. A happy energy surged through him as he thought about the afternoon session with his wife…_his_ wife. _Wow, who would have believed it a year ago? To think that she loves me…married me… still wants me. _The enormity of the turn of events engulfed him. Old doubts about himself, his ability to keep her happy, build relationships with the kids, to be the man he wanted to be…they all faded as he realized that he was doing all of those things. Finally. Loving Catherine and being loved by Catherine, it was the best thing that ever happened to him….made him a better man…_No, this guy was always there,_ Jim thought. _It just took the right woman….the right circumstances for me to be him. _A snapshot of Catherine flashed in his mind and he smiled inwardly. _I gotta do something…find a way to tell her…make her understand how I feel, what she does for me…_

Just then the car doors opened and two happy kids crawled in. Glancing over his shoulder into the backseat, he smiled. "Well, if it isn't Wally and the Beaver…" Both faces looked at him as if he had lost it but Jim knew that for him, finally it had been found.

Jim worked his way back into full duty and he and Catherine tried to work the same shifts, although they were not supposed to work the same scenes. After so many weeks of having her around so much, he was suffering from not seeing her. When he had light duty, he was around the PD all the time and could sneak over to CSI for a friendly visit, but those times were becoming rare now. Usually he only saw her at work if she happened to be in the lab while he was there on a case or if she was at PD following up on an interrogation and they ran into one another. Occasionally she would show up at his office door, but only for a quick hello and then they both had to get back to work.

The guys at the lab noticed Jim's roving eyes whenever he showed up there. It was obvious that although he might be there on a case, he _was looking for_ Catherine. His need to see her amused them and they tried to steer the two together whenever possible.

The investigation into the shooting of Warrick Brown had been going on for months…almost a year. The evidence had been slim and as time passed, hope got slimmer that his killer would ever be caught. But Jim and the Graveyard CSIs never gave up. They continued to work the case between all the other cases that came across their desks. A break finally came when a former employee of Gedda, the man Warrick had been accused of murdering, was brought in for questioning on another case. Jim fought to hide his delight as the man offered information on the whole Gedda story in exchange for leniency on his current charge.

As Jim and Grissom sat in the interrogation room with Leo Hopkins, pieces of the puzzle began to fall into place. Hopkins confirmed that Brown had been set up. Hopkins, one of Gedda's former body guards, was there when the showgirl had been murdered and placed in Brown's car.

"So, Gedda did kill her?" Jim asked.

"Yeah…with a couple of the guys helping. But not me, I swear. I kinda liked the girl. But it wasn't Gedda's idea."

"What do you mean….somebody else was pulling Gedda's strings?" Jim prodded.

Hopkins swallowed and stared across the table at the cop and then the guy with the beard. They both looked pretty intense. The cop was asking the questions and he seemed angry but the other guy…there was a controlled rage boiling in him and it frightened Hopkins. "Yeah…he would get phone calls…"

"Who from?"

"I'm ….not sure," Hopkins stumbled. "He never used the guy's name." Two sets of eyes glared at him, both blue and hard. He knew he would have to answer a lot more questions… and prove that he wasn't there when Brown was actually shot. Otherwise, he might take the heat for the guy's death. "Bu…but I think I saw him a couple of times when he came to the club to talk to Gedda."

Jim shoved some pictures across the table. "Any of these guys look familiar?" One of the pictures was the police officer that they knew had been there for Gedda's death.

Hopkins studied the photos and shook his head. "No…don't recognize these guys," he said fearfully. He could feel the noose tightening around his own neck.

Jim and Gil sighed, perplexed. "Okay, well….you got nothing for us." Jim motioned to the officer on the other side of the door, who came in to walk the guy back to lock up. They watched as Hopkins stepped into the hall and froze. Alarmed, Jim and Grissom looked at one another and then in the direction of the prisoner's glare. Then suddenly Hopkins stepped back into the room. "Him…that's who I saw…"

Jim was incredulous. He was sure his expression matched Grissom's expression of pure disbelief. Hopkins had just fingered the Under-Sherriff, McKeen. "Okay…you may have just bought yourself some easy time…but for your own sake, don't say anything to anybody about this, okay?" Jim's voice was gravely and hard. He wanted to get his point across. He nodded to the guard again, who took Hopkins by the arm and led him down the hall to lock up.

Grissom and Jim were left standing in the room. "Now what?" Grissom asked.

Jim shrugged. "If he's our mole…I mean, I never thought a low rank officer could pull off what our mole had done. I knew it had to come from higher up; I just never suspected that high…"

"Yeah…"

"So, we need to be careful here. Let me do a little snooping and you and the others go back over the physical evidence for any sign of McKeen."

"Right."

"And Gil….be very careful and be sure the others are too. We don't need anymore dead CSIs."

Gil nodded and then headed out the door. Jim stared, his mind racing. This was dangerous, very dangerous. He had been through the investigation of dirty cops back in Jersey. Hell, he'd done the investigating there too. It would get ugly…just when he thought he'd finally left all of that behind he was getting slapped with it again here in Vegas. But this time would be different. This time he would have Catherine's support. "Oh my god," he whispered. "Catherine….what if McKeen goes after her?" Jim became even more determined to expose the guy. He didn't want the man to have anything more to do with his family.

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I must say, I'm feeling a bit abondoned right now. After so much wonderful support through reviews, the numbers have dropped seriously over the last few chapters. I do appreciate the loyal reviewers who drop in to chat after almost every chapter. You guys keep me inspired! The next couple of chapters belong to you.


	37. Snooping Around

Jim did do some snooping. There were gaps in McKeen's schedule for the past few months where his where abouts were unknown. And no one seemed to know where he was the night Warrick was shot. Jim headed to CSI to see how Grissom was doing with his review of the evidence.

Catherine was walking down the hall when Jim turned the corner. His expression worried her; he had that look…the one that said he was angry…beyond angry; the expression that he got when a case really got to him. "Jim?" she said apprehensively.

His eyes met hers but then seemed to look through her. Then he glanced around and pulled her into her office. Closing the door, he spoke softly. "You okay?"

"Yeah," she answered, confused. "What…"

"McKeen been around here today?"

"Ah…no. Jim, what's going on?"

His voice was low and gravely. He was frowning, his eyes dark. "We got a break on Warrick's case."

"You did?" she was excited…relieved. The case had seemed unsolvable and it weighed on all of them. "What's the break?"

"One of Gedda's body guards…he, um…pointed the finger at McKeen."

Catherine was shocked. "Our McKeen? As in the Under-Sherriff?"

"Yeah," Jim sighed. "Listen, Gil and I are trying to work this very quietly, you know. I mean, if it is McKeen…"

"Yeah," Catherine said thoughtfully.

"Well, he's already killed one of us…I don't want you in his crosshairs. You understand what I'm saying here?"

"I think so," she said slowly.

"At some point, he's going to figure out that I'm looking into his activities…stay away from him, Baby. Don't let him anywhere near you, okay."

"Yeah…ah, okay. But what about you? If her finds out you are investigating him…won't you be a target?"

"Possibly. But I'll be able to watch my back better if I'm not worrying about you…and the kids. Maybe you could take a few days off to stay with them. Maybe get Sam's old body guard to hang around too."

"I'll see about the days off, but honestly…Sam got shot with the guy standing right there. I don't trust him with the kid's lives."

"Yeah….you got a point." His hands went to her arms, gently sliding down from her shoulders to her wrists, where he claimed her hands. "I just need to know you and the kids are safe. If anything happens to any of you, I…"

"Nothing's going to happen, Jim. I'll get the kids and we'll set up at one of Sam's places. He won't get to us there."

"Okay, good. Yeah, that'll be good." Jim said, relief sweeping through him. "Let me know when you settle so I can breathe again."

"Yeah. But you have to promise me…"

"What Baby?"

"You'll be careful. I need to breathe too."

"Yeah. I'll be careful. Nothing stupid, I promise. Just…" His hand went to her cheek, his thumb caressing the outline of it as his fingers held her jaw. Catherine saw his expression change from concern to anguish. "Just be there for me when it's over…"

Her arms enveloped him and she held him securely. "You know I will. I'll be waiting…"

Grissom was locked in one of the layout rooms with the evidence. Jim found him there and listened as the criminalist went over the evidence. "We don't have much to work with," he began. "But there was a hair on the passenger door. We couldn't get DNA from it because there was no follicle but if we can compare it to one of McKeen's…"

"So what, one of us walks up to him and says, 'Pardon me, but may I have a hair?" Jim's attitude was cocky and sarcastic.

Gil smirked and then shrugged. "We'll find a way. Also, there was a footprint near the car; if we could get into his closet….compare his shoes…"

"What size shoe?"

"Size 11 with a distinctive pattern…also," Gil said as he reached for the mold of the footprint, "look at the way the weight was distributed. The owner walks on the outside of his foot somewhat. There's more wear on that part of the sole. See," he said as his finger traced the pattern, "he sort of rolls from the heel to the toes; an easy step, not a hard one"

"So he walks lightly, not a heavy step like some men."

"Right."

"Okay, anything else?"

"Just one thing but I doubt it will matter anymore."

"What's that?"

"We found traces of burnt skin on one of the shell casings. The casing flew back and hit him on the hand or arm, most likely. There would have been a burn mark for awhile. In all likelihood, it has healed by now."

"Damn…"

"Yeah," Grissom said as he stared at the table filled with the evidence.

Catherine called Jim just before the shift ended. "I've got the kids and we are at Sam's ranch. There's plenty of security here. Mom suggested it actually. She's here too. You're being careful?"

"Yeah, but so far there's not much to be careful about." They talked a few more minutes and then Jim let her go to bed. He headed home to an empty house.

The next two days were uneasy ones for Jim. As he and Gil worked every angle they could think of, he worried constantly about his little family. He called Catherine several times throughout the day to check on them and each time, she assured him that they were okay. And when he tried to sleep, the nightmares were horrible. In his dreams, McKeen went after Catherine, taking from Jim that which he treasured most in life. Various scenes played out in his dreams, all ending with her death. He soaked the sheets as he sweated through them.

Then suddenly, the case broke open. McKeen had seen Hopkins in the hall and the prisoner's reaction to him. The Under-Sherriff tried to make the witness go away by having the charges against him dismissed. The D.A. alerted Jim, who headed for the jail. "What's going on?" he asked the Under-Sherriff. "Why are you messing with my case here?"

"Just trying to clear the backlog," McKeen told him. "This guy's been sitting here for days. We need to arraign him or let him go."

"He's scheduled to go to court this afternoon," Jim offered.

"Oh…well, alright then." McKeen was hesitant. Hopkins looked like he was going to be sick.

"What's wrong, Hopkins?" Jim asked.

"He…he um….please, don't let him take me out of here…"

Jim frowned. "Why not. I'd think you would like to get out?"

"No, not with …him. He…."

McKeen was trying to stare Hopkins down and then looked nervously at Jim. "You can't listen to him, Jim. He's rattled. No telling what he might say."

"Yeah, I know…." Then Jim turned to Hopkins. "But I'd like to hear what he has to say anyway."

Hopkins answered Jim's cue. "He…was the man behind Gedda. He….he was the one that ordered Gedda killed. That other cop, he told Gedda that right before he shot him."

"You heard that?" Jim asked. "Why didn't you tell me that before?"

Hopkins swallowed and looked from one man to the other. "I thought if I kept my mouth shut, I'd be okay. But since he came after me…"

Jim looked from the prisoner to McKeen. "Care to explain?"

"He's crazy, Jim. A lunatic…"

"So if we investigate his allegations, you'll be in the clear?"

"Yeah, but…"

"But what?

McKeen blanched. "You're going to investigate _me_?" He looked horrified.

"Have to check out his allegations. But hey, you said you'd be in the clear, so no problem, right?

The other man swallowed with difficulty. "Yeah… no problem. Okay, just do what you need to do," he said icily before turning to walk away.

Three hours later, McKeen was stopped by the state troopers. He was on the Interstate headed south, out of Nevada. Jim drove out to place his cuffs on the man personally. Now that they had him, they could investigate thoroughly. Within hours they had the evidence they needed to pin three murders on him. He had ordered the murder of Lou Gedda, killed and buried the young cop, and finally and most importantly to Jim, they had him for the murder of Warrick Brown.

Jim called Catherine. "We got him," was all he could manage. Suddenly he felt very tired…and old.

"For real. He really did it?"

"Yeah…once he tried to run, we had him."

"Yeah." She heard the emptiness in his voice, the hurt. Once again he'd been responsible for taking a bad cop off the street. But in this case, it was a higher up…someone Jim had worked closely with at times and someone for whom he had held a lot of respect. McKeen had stood vigil at the hospital when Jim was near death. And now Jim had arrested him and helped collect the evidence that would put him away. Yeah, he was hurting….again. "Look, it's nice out here at the ranch. Why don't you come out for a couple of days to rest…relax. Then we can all drive back together."

Jim hesitated, thinking he just wanted to go home. But then he remembered; she was his home. "Yeah, I'll pack a few things and head out."

"I'll be waiting," she said, the tone of her voice telling him that he needed to hurry. She had missed him as much as he had missed her.

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Wow, you guys are fantastic! I opened the reviews for this story and there were so many on the last chapter that I did the happy dance in the middle of the floor, lol. Thank you! It really energized me to see so many responses. I hope you like this chapter too.


	38. Primal

The guard at the gate called Catherine to let them know that Jim had just driven through. Consequently, she was waiting for him on the front porch when he drove up. Her heart tightened in her chest when she saw him get out of his car, his normally squared shoulders slumped and his head low. He looked deflated.

Once he was on the porch, she embraced him, wanting to give him some of her strength. His arms wrapped around her in response and he held on as if his life depended upon it. She wasn't sure what she expected him to say, but he was quiet…too quiet, as they walked into the house.

Drew flew into the entry and grabbed Jim immediately. Jim picked him up and held him but still said nothing. The trio walked into the den at the back of the house, where Lily and Lindsey were. Lily looked up, saw the expression on Jim's face and quietly reached over to touch Lindsey's arm. Picking up her Grandmother's clue, Lindsey greeted Jim and then suggested to Drew that they go look at the horses. Lily hugged Jim and then made some noise about taking a short nap and disappeared down a hall.

Lindsey took Drew's hand and led him out. Sensing that he should follow his new sister, he went quietly but once they were outside, he whined. "I wanted to stay with Papa…"

"I know, Drew." Lindsey responded. "But right now, I think he needs to talk to Mom more than he needs to see us."

"But why?"

"I'm not sure….adult stuff. But something happened and I think only Mom can help him feel better. We need to leave them alone for awhile so she can talk to him, okay?"

"Okay," the boy said sadly. "But I hope Mama makes him happy soon…."

Lindsey giggled. "Oh, I'm sure Mom will have him in a better mood very soon…."

Catherine led Jim down a hall to the bedroom that she was staying in. Once inside, she closed the door and then wrapped him in her arms again. She could feel the tension in him as she held him, his emotions overwhelming him.

Jim felt numb; he was on overload. All the pain of Warrick's murder had come crashing in on him throughout the day and when McKeen's guilt became so obvious, other negative emotions ran through him as well; hurt, disappointment, resentment…anger, but most of all fear. He worried that McKeen would go after him through his family. And once the traitor, that's how Jim saw him now…a traitor to every belief he held, once he was booked it was as if Jim's bones had turned to rubber as the energy drained from him. And now there was only this numbness.

But Catherine felt warm…and safe. She was home, everything he wanted out of life at the moment. She was his haven, his strength. And as she began to kiss him, he felt energy slowly seeping back into his veins.

Catherine understood what he needed; if there was one thing she understood, it was men. He had been wounded and a part of him had died that day. He needed an outlet for the emotions that remained; an outlet for the fear and the tension….a release. And so she kissed him. And once she had kissed some life back into him, she began to undress him and led him to the bed.

What followed wasn't their typical love making session. Normally Jim was slow and considerate, careful of her feelings and attentive to her needs. But this afternoon, he was none of those things. His hands were rough as all of the negativity of the past few days rose to the surface. His lips were demanding. Catherine understood; he was feeling raw and edgy and she responded in kind.

Somewhere in his mind a small voiced screamed at him to slow down, be more gentle; he knew he was hurting her. But something primordial in him had taken over and his visceral nature was in control. He couldn't stop himself and the lack of control frightened him, yet he kept going.

Catherine was no stranger to rough treatment by a lover. Eddie had liked it that way. And as rough as Jim's treatment was, it was tame compared to some of her sessions with Eddie. She also knew that he would be upset later but that for now, it was what he needed. So she encouraged that side of him. Her nails scraped his skin almost to the point of drawing blood and her nibbles became gentle bites. She felt his lips on her neck and realized she wouldn't be wearing anything low cut for a few days, but that was okay. She'd brought some shirts with collars.

And when he took her there was a ferocious possessiveness to his act. While she willingly gave herself to him, she briefly wondered if he would have stopped if she had said no. In Jim's mind there was no question, no doubt about the answer; he was being driven and there was no turning back. And as quickly and fiercely as it had begun, it was over.

He lay beside her, gasping for breath, tears flowing down his cheeks as he realized how rough he had been. "I'm sorry," he told her. He couldn't look at her for her for fear that he had ruined it, spoiled the best thing in his life. "Oh god baby, please forgive me…" Then a miracle happened. She rolled over, her body covering his and she kissed him; not a forceful kiss like a few minutes before but a gentle kiss that said he was forgiven, that she still loved him. And he wept more.

Catherine enfolded him with her arms and held him tight, whispering over and over that it was alright, she understood…that she loved him. They remained there for a long time, Jim slowly calming down and accepting the love she was giving. No, it wasn't love making in their usual sense, but Jim realized that she had made love to him that afternoon. She had sacrificed her body to give him the outlet he needed and to comfort him. He clung to her, willing time to stand still so that the moment would never pass and for a short while, it seemed to work.

Eventually they began to stir, the call of nature forcing them apart. Then she took a shower as he dozed off and slipped into oblivion. Catherine pulled the covers over his tired body and slipped from the room. Back in the den, she warned the others to be quiet. Jim was tired and now he could rest.

Drew was elected to wake Jim for supper. Quietly he crawled on the bed and sat next to Jim. "Papa….Papa," he whispered.

"Mmmmm…" groaned Jim. "Drew?"

"Yes, Papa. Mama says for you to come eat."

"Mmmmm, okay. Be there in a minute," he told the boy.

"Okay," Drew said as he slipped off the bed and ran down the hall to tell his Mama. Jim yawned and rolled over, drifting back to sleep.

Catheirne joined Jim in the bed a few hours later. He was still sleeping soundly, so she curled up next to him, her arm draped over him, and she went to sleep too. Late in the night, she felt him squirming and heard him calling her name. She woke and realized that he was having a nightmare. Suddenly he jerked awake, sitting up and yelling for her.

"I'm here, Jim. I'm right here."

He grabbed her and pulled her to him. "I dreamed that he got to you…." His brain was in a fog; all he knew was that he needed to hold her and know she was safe.

"I'm safe, Jim. We're all safe. McKeen is in jail. You kept us safe." She could feel him shaking as he held her.

"Yeah…" he said as his mind began to clear and he became aware of his surroundings.

Catherine eased back down onto the bed, pulling him with her. "Lie down with me Jim. We'll just snuggle for awhile. I need to feel you with me too." A few minutes later Jim's shaking had subsided and they had both drifted back to sleep.

They were enjoying a late morning in bed the next day when his phone rang. "Brass," he growled into the mouthpiece. He listened. "Right. Well, I'll be back tomorrow, can we talk then?" Catherine watched as he listened more. "Yeah, okay. And then he closed his phone.

"Who was that?" Catherine asked curiously.

"The Sherriff; he wants to talk," Jim groaned. "I guess this is where he busts my ass for arresting his golden boy."

Catherine began to stroke his back, which led to other caressing….which led to a very slow, gentle, loving and lustful morning.

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Many thanks readers for your continuing support. Your reviews make my day:-) I hope this chapter was pleasing. A little more to come and then sadly, the end. Oh but wait, don't want to let out any secrets...


	39. The Meeting

Just checked on my poll results; have you checked it out? Seems people want Grissom to hang around; hmmm, imagine that, lol. Oh...and this chapter reflects some of the poll results too:-)

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Jim was scheduled for the second shift and arrived at PD while the Sheriff was still in his office. Deciding to get the meeting over with, Jim headed there before going to his own office.

"You wanted to see me?" he asked the Sheriff as he poked his head through the door. Glancing back into the outer office, he commented. "Sorry about the unannounced interruption but your secretary is not at her desk."

"Come in, come on it," was Jim's answer. The Sheriff rose from his desk, stepped around it and motioned for Jim to take a seat in one of the more comfortable chairs in what had become known as the 'conversational side' of the man's office. Either this meeting was going to be as bad as Jim had anticipated or the guy was baiting him. Usually ass chewing happened across the man's desk with the victim sitting in one of the hard, extremely uncomfortable chairs facing him.

Jim eased down into one of the wing backs and waited for the other man to begin. The Sheriff seated himself in the chair next to Jim, holding a file but only glancing at it. "I've been reading your file Jim."

_Oh no…not good, _the detective winced.

"I have to admit that on paper, you read like a cheap detective novel or something….a character out of Noir fiction. But I've gotten to know you over the years Jim and I realize this," he said as he held up the file, "this is only a rough sketch…"

Jim sat quietly, waiting for the boom to be lowered. _Early Retirement…he's going to suggest Early Retirement._

"I mean," continued the senior official, "you were shooting at a suspect when that passenger got hit…bad luck there but you were trying to get a killer off the streets, right?"

Jim nodded suspiciously.

"And the whole Holly Gribbs mess…I don't understand Atwater's decision to withdraw your promotion and bump you over to Homicide…although the realignment of the Supervisory duties did make sense. We all know that supervising isn't one of Grissom's strong points but he seems to have worked it out and his team is consistently the best. But you built that team, Jim. You put the pieces together…"

"Ah, not really….Gil recruited that group and trained them. He should get all the credit…"

"Maybe, but I'm not convinced. Willows was a loose cannon when she arrived and you got her in line and…Brown…he needed discipline. Stokes…I have a feeling Stokes would have turned out the same no matter who trained him…"

"I have to disagree," Jim said bluntly. "Stokes is a good man…and always has been. But he was naïve and a bit of a whiner in the beginning. Gil made him grow up…grow into his responsibilities."

"But it all started with you. However…I think an injustice was done to you with that whole incident. Brown had disobeyed your specific orders…why did you take the blame, Jim?"

"Because he was on my team…I was his Supervisor. That was part of my job…his actions were my responsibility. Just like you have to take the heat whenever one of us screws up…"

"Right," the man almost smiled at that one. "And the incident with Bell…he stood up into your line of fire but you never complained when the Disciplinary Board went after you."

Jim shrugged his shoulders. "I…I stood up too…" was his only response. _Why are we going over all this_? he wondered. Remembering Bell hurt and Jim didn't want the man to see how much it hurt.

"And you got your second Medal of Valor after the Willie Cuttler case… you saved that woman yet you seemed embarrassed by it. What was with that, Jim?"

Again Jim shrugged. "Walking into that room was the dumbest thing I ever did," he said.

"But it saved her life…doesn't that trump the dumbness?"

"I got lucky…" Jim growled.

"The 'Light 'em up' incident was unfortunate…"

"Yeah," grimaced Jim. "Poor choice of words under the circumstances. But we say it all the time…"

"On the other hand," the Sheriff said as he tossed the folder onto the table next to the chair, "you are out there everyday, putting your ass on the line; not necessary for a Captain to do. Most of my senior officers prefer to sit at their desk, drinking coffee and pretending to be hung up in administrative tape. You on the other hand, somehow manage to stay current on all your administrative tasks and spend a significant amount of time in the field…"

"I prefer the field," Jim said simply. "But I understand the need for the other stuff."

"Right. Thing is…" he paused.

_Okay, this is it," _thought Jim_. This is where I get my ass kicked out of here._

"You are so good at investigating that you've investigated me out of my Deputy…"

_Shit… this is it…_

"…and I find myself in need of a new one."

Jim looked at him blankly. _Why don't you just get it over with? Just kick my sorry ass out the door and end the pain for both of us…_

"And as I look around the department for a suitable replacement, only one name comes to mind."

_Why does he think I give a damn who replaces McKeen. It'll just be another ass kissing bureaucrat anyway…_

"Jim, I want you to pack your office this afternoon…"

"_Finally_…"

"…and move into McKeen's immediately. I need a Second in Command to help get through this mess. The media is all over this and I need you running interference for me. Besides, with your record of achievement, you are the logical choice. Frankly, I don't understand why you didn't get the post years ago…but that was Atwater's choice, not mine. I've been stuck with that prick, McKeen for too long. Now maybe we can get some real work done and shake things up around here."

"Wait, I'm not fired?" Jim asked incredulously.

"Fired?" The man's surprise was genuine. "Hell no. I need you Jim. I need you to help me straighten out this department. We have too many officers with their hands in the casino and club pockets…looking the other way. You've been battling corruption your whole career, it seems. I need your experience…your knowledge."

Jim swallowed. "Yeah…I guess it seems that I have done that. But really, are you sure you want me in McKeen's office? I mean, won't it look a little…odd? Besides, as you pointed out earlier, I don't exactly have a model record…"

"There are some rough spots…but you always come down on the side of what's right, Jim. Hell, even the Bell incident… you stood there after the funeral, ready to take whatever Tracy had to dish out. Your grief was palatable and so was your despair. Everyone in the room felt it. And you had the balls to stand there and face the woman, let her have her shot at you…You earned a lot of respect that day Jim. Not many of us, and I include myself, can honestly say that they would have the strength to do that."

"I did what I thought was right," Jim defended himself.

"Exactly; this is why I want you as my Second in Command. You will do what is right…"

Jim just sat there, staring at the man. _I'm hallucinating…_

"Now, I believe you have some packing to do? But first, find that gorgeous wife of yours and give her the good news," the Sheriff said as he stood, signaling that the meeting was over.

Jim stood and shook the man's hand. "Congratulations Jim. You deserve this and I'm very confident that I've made the right decision." Jim thanked him and then walked out of his office still bewildered.

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You guys were so responsive with your reviews; I just had to hurry and get this chapter posted. See how it works!


	40. Initiation

"You're where?" Catherine queried her husband through the telephone.

"I'm in the office of the Under-Sheriff, unpacking," responded Jim. "Care to meet me for supper? I'll explain it then." Catherine could hear his disbelief over the phone.

She met him an hour later at Frank's, a diner down the street from PD. After they had ordered, Catherine looked across the table at Jim. "So give…what's going on?"

Jim smiled, still in a state of incredulity. "Baby, you're looking at the new Under-Sheriff of Clark County."

"You're kidding…tell me, what happened?"

"I still can't believe it. I stopped by to get the meeting with the Sheriff over and the next thing I knew, he was congratulating me. He said …I'm the logical choice. He wants help in cleaning up the department."

Catherine's eyes glistened. "You deserve this Jim. You've deserved it for a long time. But out with the details...he really said you are the logical choice?"

"Yeah. When I first walked in, he had my file. Gotta tell you, it made me really nervous. He rehashed all the _high points_ of my career here and I knew he was about to cut me loose. Then, next thing I knew he was giving me the job. He said he didn't understand why Atwater kicked me over to Homicide after Holly Gribbs. He said that was Atwater's mistake…"

"He's right…although I've enjoyed working with you all these years."

"I was in shock, Baby. I still am. I mean, I gave up on it after the Gribbs case and I was okay with that. But now…"

"You're finally getting what you deserve, Jim. I'm so happy for you, so proud of you." Catherine was beaming.

"It means different shifts for us though…" he sounded disappointed.

"We'll work it out. Maybe I can work my way onto days."

"That would mean a demotion for you. No way, you deserve to have your career too."

"I'll be okay. Besides, I 'm not sure how much longer I want to do this. After Warrick…well, it just broke something in me…losing him like that. We work and work to try to bring justice to the victims and then end up victims ourselves. First it was Holly…and then Nick, then you, then Mike…I was abducted and then Lindsey, Gil almost burned out and then Sara got taken by the Miniature Killer…it just never seems to stop. I'm glad you'll be out of the field…I won't worry so much, you'll be safe. And I'm really not sure how much longer I can do this job."

One of the unexpected consequences of Jim's promotion was the resignation of Conrad Ecklie. He and Jim had sparred over the years and apparently the A.D. of the Lab was intimidated by the former detective being his senior, although Jim was several rungs up the ladder from Ecklie, meaning Ecklie would seldom have to report to him. Ecklie's departure left an administrative position open in the lab.

Jim sat down with the Director to discuss possible replacements. Catherine's name came up and Jim quickly bowed out. "Conflict of interest," he explained. "Why don't you sit down with the Sheriff and make a decision?"

A few days later the Director walked into Jim's office. "I want to explain our decision to you personally, Jim. We asked Grissom to take the position but he declined. We did consider Catherine, but she doesn't have enough of an administrative track record to elevate her to that position and besides, we thought it might be awkward with you as her superior, although you would rarely have immediate supervision over her. Looking at the other Supervisors, we just didn't see anyone with the experience and know how. So we're shopping for a replacement for Ecklie, as A.D. However, we are extending an offer to Catherine to replace him as Supervisor of the day shift. She's earned the opportunity. Again, we offered it to Grissom first and would have made her sole Supervisor of Grave, but he declined. Realistically, I think that's best. Day shift has more administrative responsibilities and we all know how much Gil despises that part of his job. Catherine handles that aspect very well."

"I appreciate your telling me this, but have you told her yet?"

"I thought you might like to be there…" smiled the Director.

"Ah…I do want to be there, as her husband, not as her superior. So why don't you give her the good news and then I'll get to hear it all from her."

"Okay….as you wish. And Jim, I appreciate that you kept your hands off of this. It could have been really awkward if…"

"Just trying to do what is right for everybody," Jim told him. "You know your people; it should have been your decision."

Catherine walked into his office a few hours later. "Hey…" she smiled at him.

"Hey yourself," he smiled back, waiting for her to tell him her news.

She sauntered towards him with that sway of hips that was all Catherine and slid onto the corner of his desk, looking down at him in his chair. Her whole demeanor was predatory and she had a look…that look about her that said she was on the prowl and he was her chosen prey. Leaning back, he grinned up at her wondering what she was up to. He licked his lips as his eyes roved the length of her tantalizing body and quickly he realized that his reaction to her was a totally inappropriate response as her superior. However, as her husband…_amazing_ he smiled. _That look is for me… _But he waited patiently.

Her eyes caressed him before glancing around the room. She glanced over her shoulder at the door and as quickly as she had slid on his desk she was off. Jim watched the curve of her hips as she swayed towards the door and closed it. She turned and faced him, again looking around his office.

"Something about my office bothering you?" he smirked.

Her eyes settled on him and a seductive grin grew on her face. "Yeah," she told him as she headed back to him. "It hasn't been properly christened…"

Jim squirmed in his chair. "Ah, what, I need to get a bottle of champagne and break it across my desk?" _God she looks hot…_

"You need to break something across your desk…"

His eyebrows rose towards his receding hairline as he sucked in a deep breath. "I do?"

"Yeah…I'd suggest a virgin's cherry but…"

"Can't. I'm a married man and my wife would emasculate me…literally. There'd be blood everywhere; she's a blood analysis expert over at CSI, you see. She knows about these things…."

"You make her sound very dangerous," she said huskily.

"Oh yeah," he licked his lips, "very…"

"So no virgin cherries then, huh?"

"No…I um, like my body parts intact…"

"Mmmmm, and such nice body parts too," she murmured as her eyes undressed him.

"Just average…" he quipped, his eyes fixed on one particular set of her body parts.

"Mmmm, you call that 'average?' she asked as she eyed the added volume in his pants.

"Uh…well, yeah. It's about average for such close proximity to…"

"What? A virgin?"

"A vixen like you." He reached up and grabbed her by her waist and pulled her down into his lap, nearly overturning the chair. She giggled as she landed on him, readjusting her position to get the full effect of the recent growth in his pants.

The room suddenly grew hot as their lips locked and the fires of passion leapt between them. Catherine fanned the flames, using every advantage to raise his 'average.' After a few minutes, Jim pulled back, sucking for air. "My god, woman…you trying to get me kicked out before I ever get started in this job?"

She snickered. "No. But…I do think we need to initiate your office….for good luck."

"And if someone walks through the door?"

"It's locked and I told your secretary, Ms. Hot-in-the-Pants for you, that you didn't wish to be disturbed. She looked disappointed, I might add. I think she was hoping to be the virgin offering."

"Who? Sandra? I don't think so. I've seen her boyfriend…"

"Yeah, well…he might be a hunk but all body and no brains gets old. Besides, you know how to treat a woman…how to appreciate without going all caveman. Her hunk probably falls just short of clubbing her and dragging her by the hair into the cave…"

"I thought you liked it when I go all caveman on you," he queried as his hand combed through her hair, his blue eyes delighting in the sight of his thick fingers caressing her silky mane.

"Sometimes it's fun; but not as a steady diet. But I don't want to talk about Sandra and her hunk…"

"You brought her up…" he chuckled.

"To let you know that she's guarding the door…"

"Ah…" he acknowledged as his fingers traced her jawline with a featherlike touch. "Then…"

His words were cut off by her kiss. Once she was satisfied that he was sufficiently aroused, she slid off his lap and onto his desk, her legs straddling him. His eyes grew wide as he realized she was wearing nothing under her skirt. Chuckling mischievously, he began to caress her legs, his hand moving slowly upward. "You are a naughty, naughty girl Catherine."

"But you like naughty, don't you Jim?"

His answer was physical rather than verbal as he rose to meet her over his desk. Never in his entire career had he taken a woman on his desk. He'd thought about it, fantasized about having this particular woman between him and the smooth surface and now it was happening. She responded to him with fervor and the meeting was concluded in just a few minutes, leaving them both satiated and gasping. He settled back into his chair, too weak in the knees to stand, and looked up at her. There was so much he wanted to say, but words just wouldn't come to mind, so he just stared at her, looking like a love struck puppy, smiling.

She smiled down at him, her color returning to normal. Then suddenly, she slid off his desk and bent over him, pausing just inches away from his lips. "Now, you're going to have to help me initiate my new office…"

Eyes widening, Jim licked his lips. "Your new office?"

"You know about it…you have to."

"Ah…I want you to tell me about it."

"I'm the new Day Shift Supervisor. I get a nicer office."

"Congratulations Baby. You've worked hard for this."

"Well, being married to the Under-Sheriff probably didn't hurt…"

"Had nothing to do with it. The Director made the decision all by himself. And I think he made a good one too…"

"Mmmm, well, you still need to help me initiate my new office."

"Today?" he asked incredulously. "Because I don't think I can…not after...well, what just happened."

"Let me get moved in first," she laughed as she opened his door and headed out, leaving Jim in his chair wearing a goofy grin.

A week later, he appeared in her doorway to return the favor.

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	41. Rounding Third and Heading Home

It took a few weeks for everyone to adjust to the new schedule. Lindsey was elated that her mother would be at home for her now and began to open up more, even asking her mother to take her shopping, an activity that Lindsey had not wanted to share for months.

Drew blossomed with the new schedule. He was sleeping better at night and talked non stop from the time they picked him up from school until well after supper. Jim and Catherine took turns helping him with homework, making sure he got caught up with the other children in his class. Jim was careful to be sure that Drew spent time alone with Catherine and a bond was developing between them. Slowly the little family was coming together.

Former Under-Sheriff Jeff McKeen had been arraigned and his trial date had been set. It was only a few weeks away. Everyone was surprised by how quickly things progressed but the D.A.'s office wanted to be sure that the public saw a speedy reaction to the criminal behavior of the public official. Oddly, the defense also wanted a speedy trial and so did nothing to block the D.A.'s efforts. The media pounced on the story, pointing out the irony that McKeen had been appointed in lieu of Captain Brass and then it was Brass who broke the case open…now replacing McKeen. The media blitz of the story and inquiries into Jim's career made for an uncomfortable few days, but then one of the casino moguls was found murdered in his hotel suite and the press moved on to the new story, much to the relief of the entire Brass clan.

It was a week before the trial was to begin when Ms. Goodlette once again appeared in their lives. She appeared on their doorstep, unannounced one morning, ready to inspect the home. Catherine was furious since it was her day off and she had yet to get dressed. She'd cooked breakfast and was depending on Jim to take the kids to school. He had just come out of the shower and stood in the hallway in his slacks and undershirt, hair dripping, and frowning. "You couldn't call first?" he growled.

"No, I need to see the family in a normal setting, acting as you do everyday." She retorted.

Just then Lindsey came bounding in, IPod attached to her ears, and humming along. Drew ran down the hall and stopped in his tracks when he saw the woman from CPS. Jumping behind Jim's legs, he peered around his Papa at the woman, afraid she had come to take him away. Jim tousled his hair and spoke softly. "Hey Buddy, Mama has your breakfast ready. Go on in the kitchen and eat or you're going to be late for school." Drew inched along the wall, his back skimming it as he warily watched the woman. When he got to the doorframe, he bolted through and sat at the table, where Catherine served his plate. Once he was settled, she joined Jim in the hall.

"What is it you wish to inspect, Ms. Goodlette?"

"The house, your behavior around the children…their routine. Does your daughter always have that thing attached to her?"

Jim smirked. "No, we make her take it off in the shower."

Catherine elbowed him. "She listens in the morning and leaves it in the car while she is in school and then listens in the evenings after supper."

"While doing homework?" the woman was aghast.

"We tried making her go without, but she didn't get much work done, so we tried letting her have it for homework and her grades have improved. So yes, we let her have it while she is doing homework. Besides, she'll soon be graduating and heading off to college. Isn't it better that we let her learn to take responsibility for her choices now while she has us to fall back on, rather than having to learn it after she leaves home?"

Catherine had her on that one. Ms. Goodlette harrumphed a small acknowledgement. "And the boy? Is he behaving any better?"

"He's doing much better," Catherine emphasized. "He's catching up in school, has made a few friends, depends less on Jim and has become an important part of our family."

"Humph, we'll see," said the woman. "May I see the room where he stays?"

Catherine glanced at Jim. "You go eat. I'll show her his room. Otherwise you won't have time for breakfast."

Jim glanced at Ms. Goodlette and then nodded at Catherine. "Okay, thanks."

Catherine led the woman to Drew's room while Jim headed for the kitchen. Jim took charge of getting the kids ready and managed to get himself together as well. The kids headed for the car while he went to find Catherine. Poking his head around the corner, he spoke into Drew's room. "Okay Baby, we're heading out. I'll call you later," he told her.

"Excuse me," Catherine said to Ms. Goodlette. Stepping into the hall she hugged Jim and laid a steamy kiss on him that would make a polar bear sweat. He smirked as they broke apart. "You're not very nice," he whispered. They both were aware of the CPS woman lurking in the doorway.

"Call me later," Catherine smiled.

"Yeah…before lunch," he said as he headed out.

Catherine turned her attention back to Goodlette. "Sorry, but I always make it a point to send him off to work like that. He needs to know I'm here for him."

"And what about you, Mrs. Brass? Is he here for you?"

"Most definitely. Jim's the best thing that's ever happened in my life…well, besides Lindsey, of course. And now we have Drew with us. But Jim…he makes it…complete. He's helped me with Lindsey a lot; we were having a terrible time before Jim and I got married. Somehow him being here has helped. He's a good father to her but he never lets her forget Eddie, her real father. They've developed a special relationship. And Drew, well…he's like a different kid. Jim is so patient with him."

"And you, are you patient?"

"I believe I am. It has taken a lot of effort for Drew to learn to trust me but everyday it seems to get better."

"But he still prefers your husband…"

"Jim risked his life to pull that boy out of the car, away from that child molester. Of course Drew prefers him. He's not stupid; he knows Jim saved his life that night."

"How is his counseling progressing? You are still taking him, correct?"

"Yes, we are. And he seems to be making great progress, but I would prefer that you talk to the counselor about that."

"Oh, I intend to." The woman looked around the room one more time, grunted, and then asked to see the rest of the house. Catherine showed her around, tolerating the woman's rude comments and obvious dislike of some of her decorating choices. An hour later, the woman left. Catherine shut the door behind her, walked to the couch and picked up a pillow that she used to beat the arm of the couch with. Once her angry energy was spent she sank down onto the cushion and sat, numbly reviewing the visit. She thought things had gone reasonably well, considering the surprise attack, but only Ms. Goodlette knew for sure. That thought created a queasy grumble in her stomach. "Augh..." she growled.

Jim called a little while later. "You okay?" he asked.

"Yeah, I suppose. If I had killed her, would you have arrested me?"

Jim chuckled. "I would have helped you bury the body."

They chatted a few minutes and then Jim got called away to a meeting, leaving Catherine to fume awhile longer before cleaning up the kitchen and starting in on her housekeeping chores.

Myra Jenkins called late in the afternoon to inform them that the adoption proceedings had been moved up and the court date set for the following week. "But that's the day Jim has to be in court for the McKeen case," Catherine told the attorney.

"Uh oh…well, we'll have to work around it. I can explain tot the judge and proceed with our other testimonies until Jim can appear, I suppose. I'll get back to you."

"Okay, thanks," Catherine said uneasily as she hung up.

That evening, she explained it to everyone as they ate supper. Jim's eyebrows quirked at the news but he kept quiet. Drew was visibly shaken and Lindsey…well, she was oblivious, really. "Oh it'll be fine," she told Drew, as if his whole future was already secure.

Drew began having nightmares again that night, making Jim and Catherine think maybe it was a good thing that this would be over soon. Then he could feel more secure and the nightmares would go away, maybe for good. Neither Jim nor Catherine slept easily for the next few nights, each worrying that something from their individual pasts would prevent the court from granting custody.

Finally the day came. Jim dressed in one of his nicer suits and headed for criminal court. The D.A. had promised to get him on the stand as early as possible, so that he could leave to appear in family court. Catherine and the kids headed straight to family court, where they met Myra Jenkins.

Myra did a good job of stalling for time and presenting some of the preliminary testimony, setting up for Jim and Catherine. Finally, the judge cleared his throat and asked, "Where is your husband, Mrs. Brass?"

Catherine took a deep breath and began to explain that he was a witness in a criminal proceeding when Jim slipped through the door. "Ah… he's just arrived, Your Honor," Catherine said, relieved.

"Alright, I have documentation here from Ms. Goodlette at CPS. She has conducted the interviews and inspections, inquiring not only into Andrew's progress but your suitability as adoptive parents. She has submitted a psychiatric report that says it would be detrimental to the boy's development to be taken out of your home at this time. She points out some negative aspects to both of your pasts but believes that they those events are not relevant to the present. I'm not sure what the long list of witnesses and depositions are about, Ms. Jenkins; Ms. Goodlette recommends that Andrew be placed in the Brass home permanently. Therefore, I am granting full custodial rights to James and Catherine Brass and approving the adoption." He paused and then continued. "Now, I understand Andrew has a petition to present?"

"Yes, Your Honor," said Myra. "He wishes that his name legally be changed to Andrew James, in honor of his new father."

The judge looked down at Drew. "You want to be Andrew James?"

Drew stood up and glanced at Jim. Then he looked straight at the judge, just like Ms. Jenkins had told him to do. "He's my Papa. He took me away from Stan…Stan was gonna hurt me again. I told him I wanted to be Jim, like him. But he said that might be co'fusing. Mama said maybe I could be Andrew James. That way, I'd still have the name my Mommy gave me but I'd have my Papa's name too." Then he smiled. "I'll be AJ…that'd be cool."

"So you intend to go by AJ?" the judge said softly.

"Uh huh….AJ Brass." Drew stood up straight, beaming with pride.

The judge chuckled. "Well, then Andrew James Brass, it is. And I expect to hear good things about AJ Brass in the future, son. Your Papa is giving you a good name; it's your job to take care of it."

Drew nodded as the judge hit his gavel on the block, signaling that this case had ended. Catherine was the first to get to him and hugged him tightly. Jim thanked Myra Jenkins and then scooped his son into his arms lifting him up. Lindsey hugged her mother, and then Drew. "See…told ya," she smiled.

"I think we need to celebrate,' Jim announced. "Where you like to go for lunch, Drew?"

The boy frowned at his Papa. "AJ…I'm AJ, the judge said so."

"Right, sorry. So AJ, where are we going for lunch?"

AJ looked thoughtful for a moment and then he nuzzled into Jim's shoulder. "I wanna go home."

Jim looked over his head at Catherine, who had tears forming in her eyes. "Home it is, then."

Myra Jenkins stood, watching the scene. "You guys are amazing," she said.

Catherine and Jim looked at her quizzically.

"Ms. Goodlette picked your lives apart and honestly, I was afraid we were going to lose this battle. But the pieces of your lives…your life together…it just doesn't add up. You are more than the pieces; larger than the sum of your parts."

Jim smiled at her and then glanced at Catherine. "We're a part of each other, Myra. So intertwined that nothing can break us, and Lindsey and now AJ are a part of that. You can't break us into pieces and understand anything about us."

Myra Jenkins nodded. "I envy you. What you have is rare."

Jim looked at Catherine, a warm smile overtaking his features. "I know," he said simply and then he led his family out, headed for home.

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So that's all folks. Hopefully all the loose ends are taken care of. Thanks for reading along and especially for the reviews! Please use the little button one more time and let me know how you liked the ending.


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